


What the Spring??

by polaris_dreams



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Awkward Flirting, Bang Chan/??? - Freeform, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Meet-Cute, Multi, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-25 08:08:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 37,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30086064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polaris_dreams/pseuds/polaris_dreams
Summary: Changbin is a pro at making bad decisions. From his friends, to partners and career choices - he is sure he attracts all the evils in the world. Including Jeongin. And his powerful deal to get the University's gossip board to get off Changbin's tail over his past relationship. The catch? He needs to pretend dating Jeongin's basketball player brother - Kim Seungmin.OrFake-dating au with half nerd/half clueless Changbin and playful jock Seungmin.
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Lee Felix, Kim Seungmin/Seo Changbin
Comments: 24
Kudos: 29





	1. Do you really like spring you fools?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!
> 
> This fic is inspired by the song of the same name by 10cm - my absolute favorite song for various reasons. Do give it a listen and with lyrics. You won't regret it hehe.
> 
> This is going to be my first chaptered fic, solely because it's super long and has some unique stuff :) 
> 
> As usual, shout out to Boh because this is her prompt and I hope I justified it well. 
> 
> Happy reading :)

Changbin is a pro at making bad decisions.

  
  


Ask anyone and they will nod in agreement. His parents, two losers he calls friends, his teachers. Everyone.

  
  


At first it was just trivial stuff. Like bringing home poisoned flowers or accidentally choosing the worst tasting gummy bears in 'Surprise Me' packets. It could be forgiven and forgotten easily. Young Changbin was strong enough to not cry to bed.

  
  


But then he grew up. And things got worse.

  
  


"Wait, microbiology? What were you even thinking?"

  
  


"I don't know! Yeonsoo and I signed up for it together. We will be able to find some time for us now. You know how high school was."

  
  


"Okay, I will be blunt here. You are not good at science. Yeonsoo, on the other hand, graduated top 5 in our section. I'm sure she has better University choices sitting on her desk…"

  
  


"Why do you hate her so much, Jisung? She has been nothing but nice to you."

  
  


"Hate is a big word. I don't dislike her either. It's just….She is so high-maintenance and it hurts me to see you wagging your tail behind her. She's not worth it. Wake up!"

  
  


"Don't say shit you don't know. It doesn't concern you."

  
  


"Yep, the only thing I hate here is your empty brain. You don't like science, Bin. You wanted to go with visual communications, remember? Ah, how do I knock some sense into you!"

  
  


"You are exaggerating it too much. I can learn to love it. Biology has more opportunities than photography anyway. I can try forest research later. I can look for life under the sea."

  
  


"You are scared of deep waters."

  
  


"Whatever."

  
  


"And that's marine biology. That and microbial ecology is totally different. Seriously, Changbin?"

  
  


"Okay, big brains. I forgot I was best friends with a know-it-all."

  
  


"This know-it-all has been saving your ass since primary school. Give credits where credit is due."

  
  


"Yes, sir! You are the best. Now you have to help me with the assignments please."

  
  


"Why me? You claim your genius girlfriend is going to the same course. Shouldn't you be begging her?"

  
  


"I never begged you. Fine! Yeonsoo loves me anyway."

  
  


She did not.

  
  


Oh well.

  
  


She dropped his ass only a month into the designated course. Seoul University, Forensic Sciences. Her dream career. And it wasn't just her changing universities. Apparently, long-distance was too much for her. 

  
  


All lies.

  
  


He knows she picked up another guy in Pukyong National just months after their breakup. Not that Changbin is keeping a tab on her Instagram. But things like these cannot be kept hidden. Especially in a close-knit neighborhood like theirs. 

  
  


Half of the blame goes to their University's anonymous gossip board too. 

  
  


**Pukyong Confessions** @pkconfessions

_Rumours say that Lee Sehoon (ECE 303) is dating an SNU student. They were last seen in a coffee shop near Jeonpo-gu, Seomyeon. Apparently, his date A has her car and they left together in it._

  
  


And then a picture. The girl 'A' looked suspiciously like someone he knew. He need not dig deeper, though. Universitizens were too smart and almost detective-like.

  
  


@hyewsyoo: wait, i have seen her in the uni before

@imparkjaywhy: oh yes, she was in my microbiology class. only for few weeks though

@soobinuwu: how can you people judge from pixels? i can see nothing T.T

  
  


And they were right. It was Yeonsoo. A quick cross-check on her and Sehoon's Instagram proved that.

  
  


Changbin had been dumb to believe her lies. She had kept her distance in Pukyong National stating vague stuff like 'We are new to this uni, let's keep low?' And he had given in, as usual. Now she is all out dating another fellow from the Engineering faculty and suddenly it was fine. 

  
  


Jisung has been right about her all along. But Changbin, being Changbin, had put all his faith into that 5'2" brainiac bitch. 

  
  


He was sad at first, then super mad. But it's been over three months since the rumors started and died down and no one has associated him with the alleged pixel lady yet. 

  
  


Thankfully. 

  
  


Changbin is not sure if he could have taken the gossip and all the eyes on him well. This stupid course is migraine-inducing enough. 

  
  


Anyway, as his luck has it, he can not switch to other faculty. 

  
  


At least this semester. 

  
  


His grades last semester were far below the acceptance criteria. And Pukyong National needs you to at least pass marks if you want to switch to another faculty. 

  
  


They should understand, Changbin was heartbroken and could not concentrate much. 

  
  


He had still tried to attend all the classes. Felix's idea. 

  
  


_Maybe they would accept you if you are regular._

  
  


It was a bad idea. Of course. 

  
  


First, Changbin had to rush to University at freaking 7 in the morning three days a week all semester. Prof. Huem's Molecular Biology started at 8 sharp. One minute late and you wouldn't be allowed to attend. Fighting for parking space was another headache. Seriously, who comes to University that early? Changbin is only half a human before Noon.

  
  


Second, he should have divided his class schedule better. But lovestruck Changbin had tried to match his girlfriend's schedule to be at least in the same direction she breathed. 

  
  


Thanks to that, he had one class at 8 AM, another at 11 AM and the last two at 3:30 PM and 5:30 PM. With long ass breaks in the middle which Changbin couldn't even use to travel back home. His family house is a good twenty minute ride on clear roads.

  
  


Third, constant to and fro and long hours at University made him too tired to concentrate in class. He was sleepy most of the time. Muzzled brain. Empty notebooks. God bless the technology at least he had presentations and recordings to refer to before exams. Which did not help much. Obviously.

  
  


The horrors of last semester are still fresh on his mind.

  
  


He had lost his 'first' chance to get out of Microbiology. His girl. And his room. Almost. His father had threatened dorm life away from the luxuries of his own place. That would mean no jacuzzi tub, multiple game stations, home theatre, and everything dorms could only dream of having.

  
  


A fair threat.

  
  


Because Changbin hates dorms. Tiny spaces of horny people that never let you be on your own. They would constantly judge you and walk over you if needed. Like University life but hundred times worse. He has heard enough stories from Jisung to come to this conclusion. 

  
  


His best friend is not the one staying at a dorm. 

  
  


Jisung's boyfriend Felix is. 

  
  


Changbin has never personally visited the one bedroom lodging area which Felix shares with a senior. But he can imagine how it is going to be - dirty and full of smelly clothes. 

  
  


Sungjin plays for the University's baseball team. Just a regular jock. He is forgetful on top of everything. Always dropping by their table to fetch keys from Felix. 

  
  


It's not that Changbin has a thing against jocks. He was pretty popular in high school himself. Interacting with them is just not on his priority list for now. He has exams to pass. Which will start in the next few weeks. He has moped enough, it's time to get his dignity back. There's a lot at stake.

  
  


He can do it. He can get the numbers on board. If he concentrates hard enough, he will be able to mug everything needed for his papers. Jisung is helping him with the reports anyway.

  
  


Semester two is going to be a piece of cake. Hopefully.

  
  


\----------

  
  


They say when life gives you lemons, you should make a lemonade.

  
  


It wasn't even lemons for Changbin. Not a fruit. Plain rock. Unusable rock.

  
  


"Wait, what do you mean all the seats are full? It's impossible!"

  
  


His raised voice does nothing to phase the girl at the student counselling desk. She looks bored at max. Judging eyes behind thick glasses.

  
  


"Sorry, Mr. Seo. We only had one place in Communications. And we had to give it to someone else. They had higher grades than you."

  
  


"It's unfair! I had grades above the acceptance criteria! At least take an interview or something!"

  
  


"Feel free to contact the faculty. I can only help this much."

  
  


And then she gives him a look. Clearly asking him to get lost and stop wasting her time.

  
  


Changbin leaves reluctantly. Mind full of the curses he is going to write to the faculty heads. This is not fair. All his hard work gone into waste.

  
  


No wonder they called him up on semester break. He had expected good news. How innocent of him. At least he was asked to visit the office at 3 PM. Changbin is awake enough to control his anger. Hopefully.

  
  


He decides to take a walk around the campus to clear his mind. It's deserted save for a few students who might have stayed back for the holidays. 

  
  


Changbin is still not very familiar with the campus. His one year here had been him spending time in classes, commuting to home and back, and spending whatever time he was left on campus to cram lessons. Mostly in the library or under this particular tree in the fields. Jisung and Felix joined him more often than not.

  
  


First year is usually fun for University goers. Changbin can not relate. 

  
  


He is not the quiet type. His parents love to throw parties and get togethers. Mingling with strangers and making small conversations is like second nature to Changbin. He had met Jisung in one of those at six years of age. And Yeonsoo in another. At 15. 

  
  


But for the past two semesters, he has been trying too hard to remain anonymous. Avoid any eyes on him. First because he doesn't want anyone to notice his association with Yeonsoo. He could do better than being the butt of the 'poor guy' jokes. Secondly, he has no time to spare on the college-life buzz.

  
  


Or dating. 

  
  


Meeting someone new. Starting something with them. Couple happy moments and then everything goes down. 

  
  


The 'happiness' is all illusion. You get nothing out of it, but pain. The bright weather, rosy days are all movie shtick. 

  
  


The motivation, the urge to write poems for them. It all comes back to bite you in the ass later when you burn your diaries. Your memories.

  
  


Reality is far different than the one you see with your supposed 'partner'. 

  
  


They indulge you and then they leave you for someone else.

  
  


Like Yeonsoo did.

  
  


He would rather spend his time studying. No joking.

  
  


Call him a shit friend. But Changbin's been suspiciously eyeing his best friend's relationship ever since his own breakup.

  
  


No bond can be this strong. He refuses to accept that.

  
  


After all, Jisung doesn't even go to the same University as Felix. 

  
  


He got accepted at Pusan National University. The best University in his area. And is pursuing Economics and International trade. 

  
  


His dream course. Full scholarship. 

  
  


Changbin would have been doing the same. If not for Yeonsoo.

  
  


If being 'blind in love' was a brand, Changbin would have been the face of it.

  
  


Felix goes to Pukyong National. His University. Mass communications program. The same one Changbin is trying to get into. He is taking up advertising and public relations as his major, while Changbin wants visual communications.

  
  


And he will get it. Even if he has to repeat one year. First year is for the foundation anyway.

  
  


Anyway, if Changbin could nitpick Jisung's and Felix's relationship, he would find a lot of loopholes.

  
  


They are poles apart. Similar to Yeonsoo and him. Jisung is smart and nerdy, while Felix is chirpy and kind of 'airhead'.

  
  


Number two. They don't have common interests. While they both like reading, Felix goes frenzy over fiction but Jisung is the 'Acads guy'. 

  
  


Three. They don't see each other more than a few hours a day. Changbin knows he is being very petty here. Because you could be attached to the hip and still break up.

  
  


Like Song Joongki and Song Hyekyo.

  
  


Four. They both drag Changbin to a lot of their 'dates'. 

  
  


Is that signs of 'trouble in paradise'? 

  
  


Naah, it's just Felix being super considerate of Changbin's situation. Being the sympathetic one of the three, he takes it himself to make sure Changbin is okay. Even if it means him being 'unwilling' third-wheel to their cheesy outings.

  
  


Cherry blossoms? Who the fuck has time to walk through trees. Pink trees on top of it.

  
  


Changbin had outright refused Jisung's proposal at first.

  
  


_Um...Felix wants you to come with us._

  
  


_Come? Where?_

  
  


_Uhh...we are going to Yeouido….He is asking if you can come._

  
  


_Seriously? And you are okay with it?_

  
  


His best friend had just shrugged at that.

  
  


_Who in the right mind asks their friend to third-wheel on their own date? There's something wrong with the both of you. Are you breaking up?_

  
  


_Don't say bullshit Bin. It's not like that._

  
  


_You will do anything for Lix, yeah?_

  
  


_Anything reasonable._

  
  


_And this is reasonable?_

  
  


_Just come. I'll help you with your assignments later._

  
  


Changbin knows he had looked stupid and totally out of place that day. A bitter crow amongst dancing swans. 

  
  


But Felix has him by the leash. Just like he has Jisung wrapped around his fingers.

  
  


They had been considerate enough to hold their overly affectionate gestures in front of him. Changbin knows they are hundred times worse when alone. He had been unfortunate enough to walk in on them making out once. It was horrible. Changbin wants to burn that image from his mind.

  
  


One-time third wheeling turned into multiple such 'pseudo dates'. Pseudo, because how the fuck can it be a date when you have another person tagging along. They might as well go poly at this stage.

  
  


Which is a horrible idea.

  
  


Felix's round ass and chubby cheeks have no effect on him whatsoever. And Jisung? That's incest please.

  
  


He is not ready for any sort of romantic association. Thank you very much.

  
  


At least it's not very cold today. He would hate getting frostbite at this stage. March is just knocking on the door. Changbin is desperately waiting for his semester break to get over.

  
  


And the walk has certainly made him warmer. Changbin is not used to physical activities, his gym membership has been only utilized three times in the past year. He would rather eat and spend his day gaming away. Fitness is a myth anyway.

  
  


The white walls of his faculty look bleak and very formal, especially in front of the graphics building Changbin had just passed by. 

  
  


How depressing. He can't wait to get out of here. One year was more than enough.

  
  


Cafeteria is just around the corner. Should be empty just like the campus. He is desperately in need of pineapple juice. The sweetest of its kind. Perfect for his palate.

  
  


The heater is running on full inside. Even though there are only a handful of people. Changbin quickly unbuttons his blue cardigan. He is sweating anyway.

  
  


The tall ceilings are almost comforting. Familiar. He needs that reassurance now.

  
  


Changbin walks around the spacious hall for his favorite seat. At the far right. Overlooking the campus gardens. His fresh pineapple juice in hand. Full on expecting the garden to be empty at this hour.

  
  


Only it isn't.

  
  


There are two people making out in the broad daylight. A redhead boy and a girl in a pixie cut. He can't see the faces clearly. 

  
  


What the hell.

  
  


Snogging in public should be made a crime. 

  
  


And then he remembers all the time Yeonsoo and him sneaked out for quick makeout sessions in semi-public areas.

  
  


Disgusting.

  
  


Changbin takes his eyes off the couple and back to his drink. Right now is the best time to go through his Twitter.

  
  


**Jisung Kim** @jisung_kim

The South Korean economy fared better than many other countries in 2020, boosted in part by a large amount of government spending. The economy is expected to boost by 3.2% in the coming fiscal. Here's my report on it: [ https://bit.ly.ghs ](https://bit.ly.ghs)

  * **h.renjun** @renjun2303 These are some nice points, Jisung! Thanks for sharing the link.


  * **yenachoi** @ choiseuyena There are other factors involved too. I have added them into my case study: <https://bit.ly.yena>



  
  


Jisung's studies are actually very compelling. Changbin likes to go through them sometimes. Even when it's full of jargon and numbers he understands nothing about.

  
  


**VIXX photos** @vixxotography

Amazon's wildlife sanctuary is out of the world.

[REEL 5242012]

  
  


Ah, they are in Brazil right now. Changbin's dream team. The photography agency he wants to intern at. 

  
  


**:Donghae** @donghae1015

finally we meet! reunion party with #clubsuperjunior @choisiwon @jungsoopark_0107 @eunhyukee @jongwoonaug @kyuhyunram @shindonghee @sungmin_lee @ryeonggu @milkywayking @hangeng @snowkim 

  
  


He knows about it. His cousin had been way excited about meeting his old college mates. They had a band of some sorts back in the University. Now they are all working at different places around the globe. Donghae and his best friend cum business partner Hyukjae have a retail chain under their name. _Leesheims_.

  
  


**Yujinnie=°=** @seoyujin

nyc at 3 am shines differently :)

[Pic 1] [Pic 2]

  
  


At least his sister is having a good time. Yujin is currently working in the States. Changbin wishes he was as adamant as her. Carefree. She has always been like that - doing things the way she wants to, taking bold steps, owning her mistakes. Even if the world goes against her. 

  
  


Like their parents. 

  
  


The Seos had been furious at first. At her decision to drop University. To move out and start living on her own in Seoul. Multiple odd jobs, but the sense of freedom had won everything for her. Now she is happily out of the place she loathed the most. 

  
  
  


Yujin is happy, that's all Changbin had ever wanted for her. He can't say the same for their parents though. 

  
  
  


Sometimes the damage is so deep, any filling can leave bumps on the surface. Their fight hadn't been very smooth. Insults flying to and fro. Changbin was fourteen and could only understand half of the things mentioned. 

  
  
  


The oak doors had not been not strong enough to put curious Changbin away.

  
  
  


But he had realized one thing that day. His parents did not expect much from the both of them - just finish University and hold their reputation by being a decent social human. That's all.

  
  
  


After Yujin, the baton was with Changbin.

  
  
  


Which he was failing so bad.

  
  
  


Upcoming semesters are going to be very hard for him. Especially with a course that is difficult for even those who have a strong liking for it. 

  
  
  


But Changbin will do it. 

  
  
  


He will work harder. Gain his motivation back. 

  
  
  


He has to graduate. He has to prove himself and everyone who has ever doubted him. 

  
  
  


Visual communications can wait.

  
  


\--------------

  
  
  


"I'm thinking I should..shift on campus."

  
  


Jisung and Felix turn at him comically. Half eaten popcorn falling from his best friend's mouth. Felix has shock written all over his face. 

  
  
  


Thank God Changbin has the popcorn tub with him. They would have toppled them in horror.

  
  


It can not be that unbelievable. Right?

  
  


"What possessed you today? No, seriously. Are you okay?"

  
  


"Don't be dramatic, Sung. I realized I can save so much time. And commuting daily is tiring."

  
  


"But you hate dorms!"

  
  


"I hate you too, Felix. But I'm tolerating you well. I can do it in the dorms too."

  
  


"Wow, so mean."

  
  


"Thanks. I need to graduate and I can sell my soul if needed. It's just moving out."

  
  


"And you would tolerate a frat house?"

  
  


"Solo dorms exist. For a book genius, you sure are dumb."

  
  


"What's with you throwing insults left and right today? Like, I know you are upset about that last seat. But don't take it out on us. We are trying to help."

  
  


"I know, I am sorry. To you too, Lix. I'm just… really stressed."

  
  


"It's okay. School starts in a week. I can help you look for a dorm! I have some connections."

  
  


Changbin looks at Felix suspiciously. The smaller one is visibly excited for some reason. Like it is a mission of sorts.

  
  


But it's Felix. Who has been with him during his lows. He will trust the man. After all, he is the one staying on campus. Dorm-hunting sounds stressful enough.

  
  


"I'm okay as long as it's roomy, well-ventilated, and with an on-suite."

  
  


"Trust me. I'll find you the best one!"

  
  


"Um..thanks."

  
  


That cold response seems to satisfy Felix though. He goes back to the movie, rewinding a bit to catch up on the scenes they've lost in the conversation.

  
  


Changbin has no interest in the movie. It's a shitty chick-flick. Something about two people hating each other but then falling for each other. Such cliche stuff never happens in reality. 

  
  


In real life, you only encounter people who hurt you and then leave you alone.

  
  


Or maybe Changbin has bad luck.

  
  


Jisung's apartment is as spacious as a wealthy guy's den could be. He had moved out of home last year. A graduation gift from his parents. Changbin can't relate. 

  
  


His life had been too rosy to think about his grades at that time.

  
  


But he is happy for his best friend. He deserves all the success he is getting. And Felix.

  
  


Damn, Changbin should stop being so salty over their relationship.

  
  


The room is really dark. Only lit slightly by the blue-tinted TV screen. But Changbin can still feel eyes on him. 

  
  


It's Jisung. Boring holes into his face.

  
  


He has something to say.

  
  


They are sitting on Jisung's three-seater sofa. Entertainment center across from them. Felix is on the foot of the couch, head on Jisung's right knee. He likes sprawling himself on the rug when watching movies. It's more comfortable for him.

  
  


Changbin looks at Jisung. The question is clear on his mind.

  
  


_What's wrong, bro?_

  
  


Years of friendship and you sure develop a telepathy.

  
  


_I gotta speak to you._

  
  


_Message?_

  
  


_Sure._

  
  


Me: now tell me

  
  


Jisung: I need your help..

  
  


Me: what happened?

  
  


Jisung: It's awkward haha

  
  


Me: i have seen you naked bro

Me: whats more awkward than that

  
  


Jisung: Me asking for sex tips?

  
  


Me: wdym? 

Me: you and felix haven't done it yet?

  
  


Jisung: Yeah….

  
  


Me: why am i even surprised

Me: you drag me around everywhere

  
  


Jisung: That's not the reason

Jisung: I don't have experience you know that

  
  


Me: bro it is not rocket science

Me: even if it is

Me: you are a genius with science

  
  


Jisung: Theory and practicals are different cases

Jisung: I have read a lot about it, but I still have doubts

Jisung: What if I'm not good?

  
  


Me: im sure you will be

Me: or if not, change partners

Me: lol sorry

  
  


Jisung: You are so cruel with him

  
  


Me: idk idc

Me: BUT how do you want me to help?

  
  


Jisung: Well, you are more experienced than I am?

  
  


Me: i have slept with ONE guy, and it wasn't even good duh

  
  


Jisung: Certainly more than I have

Jisung: Plus you can tell me what's not enjoyable

Jisung: It can be more difficult than girls

  
  


Me: trust me it is

Me: but the main thing is being cautious? like be gentle, use more lubricant yada yada. dont rush.

  
  


Jisung: Do you think I can do it?

  
  


Me: kim jisung, why are you doubting yourself

Me: youll be a banger

Me: lol

  
  


Jisung: You're lame

Jisung: On that note

Jisung: Can you come with me tomorrow. I want to pick condoms and lubes

Jisung: Let's purchase them a bit further

Jisung: In case anyone recognizes us

  
  


Me: chill its not drugs

Me: its good that you being safe haha

Me: but okay

Me: i need to stock myself with ready to eat packets and drinks anyway

Me: who knows how the dorm life could be like

  
  


Jisung: It's dorm. It would be different from home of course

Jisung: But it cannot be that bad

Jisung: If it is. Come live with me

  
  


Me: and third-wheel you both more than im already doing?

Me: hard pass

Me: ill survive

  
  


"Why are you both on phones? What did I miss?"

  
  


Jisung almost jumps on his seat. Felix is looking at them with curiosity. Yellow shirt falling from his right shoulders.

  
  


He has some nice collarbones.

  
  


Stop right there, Seo Changbin.

  
  


"Nothing. I got a message from BA legal gc."

  
  


Jisung is shit at lying. At least to his boyfriend. The man is sweating now, round glasses crooked on his face. His oversized white sweater doesn't help him much.

  
  


For a genius hot shot, Jisung sure has his weak nerve in Felix. Changbin fears for him. One day he will have this nerve snapped too. Hope he will not be like Changbin and recover fast. Relationships aren't worth it.

  
  


Felix moves like a cat. Stealthily sliding into Jisung's lap. It's a wonder how his best friend hasn't given in yet. The man sure has balls of steel. Changbin could never.

  
  


The younger purrs. And that's his cue to leave before he starts a show no one would watch, ever.

  
  


"Okay. Continue. I'm going home."

  
  


He receives only hums in response. Expected. They have stopped caring if Changbin is in proximity anyway. Making out in front of a witness is as normal as breathing to them now. Bloody exhibitionists.

  
  


He can't wait to go back to his SFW games now.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


The supermarket is quiet at this hour. 

  
  


Of course. Jisung had been super cautious about the timings. He even did the background footfalls research for that particular chain. Just to be safe.

  
  


It really isn't that deep. 

  
  


They are kilometers away from Jisung's place. A precaution. But it's nearby to Pukyong. Not that Changbin cares. He knows zero people in his University anyway.

  
  


They run through the isles. Basket full of Jisung's grocery (or healthy stuff) and Changbin's junk and canned food. 

  
  


He needs to stock on Red Bull. To hell with side-effects of sugary things, he needs to survive first.

  
  


Jisung is on the other corner of the market. Sorting veggies and fruits. That's the thing with living with family, you don't have to do adult things.

  
  


Not anymore, Changbin reminds himself. This dependency is only short lived. After that you have to fend for yourself. Good luck on being a fully-functioning adult.

  
  


One crate. Two crates. Real orange juice, in case he craves something 'healthy'. Boxes of yogurt. So many choices. He is not good with choices.

  
  


Coconut ice cream.

  
  


Last box.

  
  


And it's gone.

  
  


There's another hand taking it away before Changbin can claim it. A taller boy. Tousled red hair. Too overdressed for a supermarket visit in his back denim jacket and white undershirt. And boots. Who wears boots to a family-friendly place like this.

  
  


"You are staring.."

  
  


Uh. 

  
  


That redhead is speaking to him? What the hell.

  
  


"No, I am not? And that's my ice cream."

  
  


"Why? It has your name?"

  
  


"No? But I saw it first!"

  
  


The man looks at him intently. Changbin wants to kill that smirk on his face. No way this guy is trying to get under his skin. 

  
  


"Let it go. It's just an ice cream box."

  
  


The redhead continues lazily. Covering his mouth with his free hand. He is clearly yawning. It's too early for him. 

  
  


"I only like that flavor."

  
  


Changbin refuses to let go. He can be adamant if he wants. Right?

  
  


He need not fight for long though. The redhead has his own distraction. A tall girl with straight dark hair and bangs.

  
  


"Come on, Min. Let's go. I have everything with me."

  
  


"Cool."

  
  


And he leaves the coconut ice cream. Just like that. 

  
  


They walk away. Probably towards the counter. Girl leading the way, the redhead attached to her waist. Like a lost pup.

  
  


Changbin was once like that too. Fucking whipped. Oh well, they will break up too. 

  
  


"Here you are."

  
  


Jisung is panting. Visibly nervous. He might have sprinted through the isles. So much for keeping it lowkey.

  
  


Changbin drops the ice cream tub into his basket. In case there is another ice cream stealer lurking around.

  
  


"Let's get...um...let's get our stuff."

  
  


"Alright. Second row. Near cosmetics. I saw a couple good options."

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


Jisung clearly has no idea of what he needs and ends up purchasing everything Changbin suggests. 

  
  


Changbin should have toned down on the teasing. Because now there are 5 boxes of flavored condoms - peach and cherry, 3 boxes of non-flavored, and 10 bottles of strawberry-flavored lube sitting in their basket. 

  
  


It would last them a year. Oh well.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


Remember when Changbin had doubts over Felix's selection.

  
  


Crap that.

  
  


He is a genius.

  
  


Changbin could give him his first-born if he asks for it.

  
  


He had been dreading the final dorm round since the past week. Building scenarios over scenarios. He could envision cockroaches, dirt, soppy walls and dingy rooms.

  
  


The reality was a hundred times better. Or even thousand times, if he were to compare it to the ones he has seen in the movies.

  
  


The dorm is a mini apartment of sorts. Second floor of five floors. No doorman or elevator but that is doable. Only two doors on one floor. A roomy lobby, wide stairwell, open concept. Breathable. Of course, it is on the pricier side. But Changbin can pay whatever price. He is desperate.

  
  


Plus it's only minutes away from Life Sciences faculty. A bonus indeed.

  
  


Felix had to pull some strings to get this place. Of course, this dorm doesn't look very regular. It has a wide living space with a small but workable kitchen. A 10 by 10 bedroom with double doored closets and an on-suite with a bathtub. Clean white walls. 

  
  


Overall, it looks livable and quiet. 

  
  


Changbin is really happy. 

  
  


And so he decides to treat Felix in a cafeteria just outside of the campus.

  
  


It's just three days before University starts. No wonder the cafe is bustling with young faces. None of them are familiar to him at least.

  
  


Felix is sitting across from him. Happily eating his rainbow cake and chicken puff. One bite here. One bite there. Questionable taste but whatever.

  
  


Changbin had only ordered a tall cappuccino. It's 4 PM. He has to rush back home for the 'We are sad to see you go, Changbin' party. His mom sure has weird choices. But he is going to indulge her. And everyone else. Only this once. 

  
  


"You sure are generous today."

  
  


"Don't get used to it. I'm just….thankful."

  
  


"Aw. I should mark today in the calendar. 3rd March 2020. The day Seo Changbin went soft on me."

  
  


Changbin busies himself on his phone. Scrolling mindlessly through his Instagram. There is nothing of interest there as well.

  
  


"You are so full of yourself…"

  
  


He half expects a clapback from the boy. But receives none. 

  
  


Felix is distracted. Not by him. But someone behind his back. 

  
  


It's as if he is trying to catch someone's eyes. And then he is smiling. Ear to ear.

  
  


"Hi!!!!"

  
  


So loud.

  
  


"Oh hey! Wow, you came in early?"

  
  


Changbin hears the excited voice before he sees the owner. Wow, the guy is a looker for sure. Tall and blond and totally unfamiliar. He is dressed as if for the runway. A loose white blouse tucked in neat slacks. Loafers. He has that attractive presence that could leave heads turning. 

  
  


Changbin's head has turned for sure.

  
  


He is so lost in the newcomer, Changbin almost misses another guy who is tailing the blond. He has square glasses on. Short but really cute. He is wearing a navy vintage sweater and jeans.

  
  


They both join Felix and him on the table. The blond is really graceful and chatty, he notices. And the glasses guy is mostly quiet. 

  
  


"...And I thought I should get some Americano before leaving for home. Seungmin was here too, now I can't see him. Oh well."

  
  


"Right, right. Oh, I totally forgot. Guys, this is Changbin. Second year like us. He is in….wait, what are you majoring in again?"

  
  


As expected.

  
  


"Microbiology."

  
  


"Awesome!! Channie is a science student too. Life sciences. Do you share classes?"

  
  


"I don't think so…"

  
  


"We do. I think Lab 3? I have seen you before."

  
  


Really?

  
  


"Oh really? I am sorry. I'm usually….busy."

  
  


Chan has a very soft voice. And a softer laugh. He seems like a very gentle and soft-spoken person overall. Changbin decides he likes him.

  
  


"It's okay. I understand. Our course is not exactly easy."

  
  


"I have never seen you around the campus though? By the way, I'm Hyunjin. Fashion major. Felix and I share creative writing. It's nice to meet you."

  
  


"Hi, I'm Changbin."

  
  


"Bang Chan."

  
  


"Felix Lee!!"

  
  


"Everyone knows you, Lixie baby."

  
  


The blond, Hyunjin, chuckles prettily. 

  
  


Too bad Changbin can not stay behind and chat with them. He has places to be.

  
  


A quick trip to the cafe bathroom and he will get going. The party starts at 6 PM. 

  
  


Now when Changbin says people should keep things in their pants. He actually means it.

  
  


He had just wanted to freshen up not to witness a whole make out session.

  
  


It's his third this week. First in the University, second his fucking best friend, and now this. 

  
  


Wait. That redhead seems familiar.

  
  


Oh.

  
  


It's the same guy. The park, the supermarket. And now here. 

  
  


He is dating three people at once?

  
  


Or is he fucking cheating?

  
  


Changbin hates cheating. And he will not tolerate this.

  
  


He pushes past the door, the loud sound breaking the two men apart. The dark haired guy looks at him with annoyance, while the redhead seems bored at max.

  
  


"Who are you? What are you doing?"

  
  


It's the dark haired guy. He is shorter than the redhead but fiercer.

  
  


"It's a public place. I will report you both to the management for public indecency."

  
  


Changbin is going to keep his ground.

  
  


"It's none of your business. Get out of my way."

  
  


"Let it go. Sorry for the trouble, boy."

  
  


Boy?

  
  


The audacity of this redhead to look down at him. 

  
  


Before he can shout though, the redhead clears his throat and moves out of the bathroom. The dark haired guy follows him out.

  
  


Changbin did not sign up for this mess.

  
  


Also, why does he keep bumping into this cheating asshole all the time?

  
  


Just three days and he hopes to never see him again.

  
  


\------------

  
  


Moving day.

  
  


Changbin has tried to do everything right this time.

  
  


His schedule looks better with non-zombie hours. First class at 8 AM but everything else sticking close so he can finish all his classes by 2:30 PM. 

  
  


Except Fridays. 

  
  


His lessons will stretch to 5 PM on every Friday. 

  
  


A happy thing, for a change.

  
  


Changbin has now signed up for vocational photography for extra-curricular. If not for the main, he can at least enjoy this extra-credit. Something is better than nothing.

  
  


He even got permission to bring his Skoda over. What if he stays on campus. He needs something to visit Jisung. Or just for outings. Now he has time to do things other than simply studying.

  
  


The dorm came semi furnished. He only had to drag a mattress, his clothes and some cutlery. 

  
  


Just some fixes here and there. Curtains, new sheets, a new rug, closet organized by color and he is done.

  
  


Jisung is busy with his own paperwork. Felix as well. He has a new roommate now. Sungjin is living off campus with this boyfriend. Good for him.

  
  


Changbin is almost done with his own. He just needs to attest a couple copies and he will be done. All free to relax in his new dorm. He is not obliged to attend tomorrow's orientation anyway. They will introduce freshies and he has no interest knowing their names or faces.

  
  


Fearing long lines, he had waited for late evening to submit the last of his papers. Hurried students are like hungry avengers. He does not want to cross anyone. 

  
  


It only takes him ten minutes to reach the windows. A miracle. 

  
  


He can now go back to his dorm and relax.

  
  


Changbin only has a day before his classes officially start. He could very well dedicate all the time he has left to himself. 

  
  


It's late evening now. 

  
  


Getting his dinner packed had taken him longer than expected. The hole in the wall restaurant had been full of students and a few parents. Everyone looks to socialize before starting their semester.

  
  


He just wanted his kimchi fried rice.

  
  


Changbin is walking up the stairs when he hears it.

  
  


Packers and movers.

  
  


But this place came fully furnished?

  
  


His curiosity gets the best of him.

  
  


And boy is he surprised.

  
  


The flat across him is huge. Like really humongous. He can only see the living room from the open doors, but it's still bigger than his full dorm.

  
  


Looks like it has the same set up as his though. The curtains look similar to what he had in his dorm. The TV looks almost the same size. Couch too, just make them three. 

  
  


Only the new occupant is getting them changed.

  
  


There are new sofa sets in the lobby. Still covered with plastic. A 65 inch Samsung TV cover. 

  
  


Damn, there has to be more than one person living here. The new stuff is too overwhelming for one student. 

  
  


Unless they are some rich kid who refused to let go of the luxury. Not everyone can be Seo Changbin.

  
  


Anyway, he can not see any student lurking in the area. Just the workers. They must be inside then.

  
  


He is not interested in interactions anyway. Hopefully, they will be quiet.

  
  


Changbin quickly fishes his keys out of the backpack. His dorm doesn't come with an intercom. Which is okay. He won't be getting any guests or burglars.

  
  


The sounds of moving furniture carry on till late that night. Even after he has had his dinner and prepared for bed. His gaming headphones come to his rescue or Changbin wouldn't have been able to sleep at all.

  
  


Why is he a light sleeper of all the things?

  
  


He wants to be like Felix. The boy can sleep anywhere and anytime. Comfortable spaces or not.

  
  


It's just for one day. He can do it.

  
  


\--------------

  
  


"Yeah..um..hi."

  
  


_"Hi?"_

  
  


"May I know what's the procedure to change your dorm?"

  
  


_"Okay. Name? Age? Year?"_

  
  


"Seo Changbin. 21. Second year, Microbiology."

  
  


_"Which dorm? Floor number?"_

  
  


"153, SNA dorms."

  
  


_"Okay. You can not change. Sorry."_

  
  


"Why?'

  
  


_'It's on the rulebook Mr. Seo. You did not read it before signing?"_

  
  


"No-"

  
  


_"We can't help you. Thanks for calling us. Have a good day. Pukyong University Helpline signing off."_

  
  


And they cut the call. 

  
  


Changbin could not even say another word.

  
  


His head is on fire. Paracetamol can not help him anymore.

  
  


And the sounds from the next doors is adding fuel to fire. It's like someone is hammering straight to his head.

  
  


There's a limit to wearing gaming headphones. Okay, he can use them when sleeping. But during the day?

  
  


Nothing can help. 

  
  


His neighbors are straight from his nightmares. Loud, obnoxious and inconsiderate bastards.

  
  


At first it was just the sounds of moving furniture. And it was okay. They were all settling in. He has had that phase too.

  
  


But then it was moving furniture AND shouting. A lot of shouting, screaming, and laughter.

  
  


Why do dorms have thin walls?

  
  


It's not that his neighbors were only loud at night. They were freaking monsters all the time. 

  
  


He is not sure how many people are living there, but it has to be more than half a dozen hooligans living in that apartment. Or they get a lot of guests.

  
  


Either ways, it's not good for Changbin's sanity.

  
  


The mystery is how he has never crossed paths with even a single floormate. Good for them. Changbin will rip their heads off without a second thought. That's how annoyed he is.

  
  


And it's just the third week of the semester. The studies are getting harder by the day and he has no relief. At all.

  
  


He knows the logical thing is for him to speak to the housemates like a civil person. But fuck it. Changbin will rather change his dorm than to face them.

  
  


Poor Felix. He had tried so hard to get him into this place. It's all spoiled due to his neighbors.

  
  


So he had raised a dorm ticket a few days back, stating - 'My neighbors are loud af and I can not concentrate on studies. Thank you.'

  
  


Things got better for a while. No lying, he had best two days of sleep during that time.

  
  


Calm before the storm.

  
  


Because now it isn't just shouting or moving things.

  
  


_Moans._

  
  


Someone has sex behind the walls of his living space. In the broad fucking daylight. And it's so loud as if they are moaning directly in his ears.

  
  


How can someone have sex in an apartment full of people? 

  
  


Okay, he has. 

  
  


Changbin wants to die in embarrassment. The things he has done before.

  
  


The dorm authority apparently has some rules against changing rooms. How unfair. How did he never notice.

  
  


What is he going to do?

  
  


\---------------

  
  


In hindsight, it had been a stupid idea.

  
  


Changbin should have assumed his neighbors had a thick skin. People who were not phased by insults or warnings.

  
  


The paper Jisung is holding is a solid proof of that.

  
  


"I don't know whether I should laugh or cry. It's an absolute mess, Sung."

  
  


"I can see that."

  
  


They are sitting in Jisung's living room. Minus Felix. He has an important class today. It's Saturday, Changbin has none.

  
  


He half wishes he could have stayed back in his bed. This week has been a hard one. Assignments, labs and what not. Everything expected yet so so difficult. 

  
  


Changbin is glad he has a study mate now though. Sort of. Chan and him have grown closer through the stress and workload. Often spending their free time on campus together.

  
  


He is nice and gentle. Definitely someone worth spending time with.

  
  


They are sometimes joined by Felix and Hyunjin. Their chattier counterparts. But it isn't that bad. At least Hyunjin is nice to look at. 

  
  


The best part is that they are not intrusive. They don't ask personal questions or try to pry things out of him. Not that Felix needs to know anything. All thanks to Jisung who can not keep his mouth shut in front of his boyfriend.

  
  


Anyway, Felix is still not aware of Changbin's problem with his dorm. And he is going to make sure that Jisung keeps his bro pact at least this time.

  
  


"By the way. We are not in middle school."

  
  


"Stop making fun of me."

  
  


Jisung is trying to hold his laughter. Eyes shut in half moons.

  
  


He knows this is something a middle schooler would do. So the response should have been expected.

  
  


But in his defense, it was 3 in the night and he was half asleep.

  
  


And it was his favorite paper too. He would do anything but to sacrifice a page from his favorite notebook for that shit show.

  
  


_Hi,_

_Can you please keep it quiet? I can't sleep well._

_Sincerely,_

_Your distressed neighbor_

  
  


_LOL, NO. SUFFER._

  
  


This is why Felix can not know.

  
  


Changbin is trying to be grateful. If shifting rooms can not be done, then be it. He will speak to the housemates and get things sorted. It can not be that weird, right?

  
  


But first, he has to know who is living next door.

  
  


\------------

  
  


It takes him another four days of constant hunting pre and post his schedule to even get a glimpse of his neighbors.

  
  


For people who like to destroy Changbin's sleep, they are awfully quiet during 'natural' hours.

  
  


And wow, he had imagined hunks and players.

  
  


Not this mousy boy.

  
  


Funnily enough, Changbin had bumped into this boy in the main lobby of the building. Not on his floor.

  
  


They both had exchanged their apologies. So far so good. 

  
  


He had continued climbing up his floors, the boy quietly following him. Which was okay. He could be staying at the floors above him.

  
  


But no. The boy had stopped at his floor.

  
  


Then he threw him a toothy smile and vanished behind the problematic door.

  
  


Changbin was too stupefied to say something. Or anything, honestly.

  
  


Now Changbin isn't very tall. He can admit to that.

  
  


But his neighbor, or at least one of his neighbors, is even shorter than he is? Only if his assumptions of there being more than one people in the house are correct.

  
  


It better be. This boy alone can not make all the noises. He looks pretty harmless. Wavy hair tucked behind a snapback, casual attire - yellow t-shirt and denims. Probably a freshie. But he could be wrong.

  
  


Their eventful 'meeting' happened at 3:30 PM. Just after his last class today.

  
  


Thursdays are usually hell days with Prof. Shin's Instrumentation. A.K.A. the class he is miserably failing at. Prof. Shin is strict and unapologetic. And loves to give a hard time to his pupils. 

  
  


Why is he even surprised? 

  
  


Half of the professors in science courses are like that. Chan had mentioned once or twice about his own troubles with Prof. Ham. The difference is that Chan is actually good at his subjects. While Changbin can only pass if he gives his ass to it. 

  
  


Which is becoming harder by the day.

  
  


No wonder he has shifted his base to the college library in the wee hours. A repeat of his first year, only now at night.

  
  


He is not going to complain though. It's peaceful and perfect for cramming all the lessons he is forced to feed upon. 

  
  


And the best of all - there are no noises. No horny people having their way next room.

  
  


Changbin can snack in peace and actually study. And let go of his headphones. His ears hurt from the constant use.

  
  


Today is going to be another day of camping. There's an important quiz tomorrow. 

  
  


It's 8 PM according to the wall clock in his room.

  
  


He had lounged around the rest of the evening, eating Doritos and scrolling through his Twitter. Nothing very interesting. Just a couple of very excited tweets from Felix. Apparently his mission had been accomplished. God knows what that means.

  
  


Maybe Jisung finally got over his initial nerves? 

  
  


Naah. His best friend couldn't have taken that long.

  
  


Unless.

  
  


Wait. He is yet to hear from Jisung about the 'progress'. They had dropped the topic after the awkward visit to the supermarket. Changbin had even educated him about stuff he knew in detail. Kind of like the 'bird and the bees' talk. 

  
  


No lying, Changbin is curious to know more. But it's none of his business.

  
  


He has more pressing matters in hand.

  
  


Like deciding what to eat for dinner.

  
  


And the quiz. Oh well.

  
  


He takes a quick shower to save time. Usually Changbin likes deep baths but today is not the day for that. He needs to rush so he can get his dinner and be in the library on time.

  
  


An oversized flannel and sweatpants should do for now. Not that he dresses fancy for his regular day classes anyway. 

  
  


Changbin packs everything needed for his night out in his bag. Earphones, textbooks, his iPad, mechanical pencil, markers, two packets of gums, bottled water, dorm keys. He should probably pack his neck pillow too, just in case. Now where did he keep his glasses?

  
  


He drops a quick text to Chan in case he wants to have a study session together. He has a test too, if Changbin remembers correctly.

  
  


Me: hey chan

Me: im going to the library

Me: wanna come with?

  
  


The reply is quick. Chan must have been on his phone.

  
  


Chan: Sorry, I can't. Not today.

Chan: Some commitments

  
  


Me: ok, cool

Me: have fun

  
  


So it's gonna be just him today. Better that way.

  
  


He quickly hops on his shoes and heads out. 

  
  


Only to come face to face with Chan.

  
  


Hugging a man.

  
  


What the hell.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


Changbin is not good with people.

  
  


Like seriously.

  
  


He would rather jump into a dry well then to have one on one talks. He might have been conditioned by his family parties to engage in small, meaningless conversations.

  
  


But nothing could have prepared him for interactions with someone as intimidating as this guy. Or Chan's boyfriend. Or whatever.

  
  


This man is definitely way older than him. It's written all over his gaze and the way he carries himself. He has this scary, authoritative aura. Enough to turn Changbin's insides into motionless putty.

  
  


They are still standing awkwardly in the lobby. It's been nearly 10 minutes and Changbin can not find himself to move an inch.

  
  


Chan is trying to avoid his gaze. He is not sure why. Are they hiding their relationship? It's not on him anyway. And he knows better than to rat him out. Chan is his only 'kind of' friend on the campus. 

  
  


And Changbin's views on dating are solely his, he can not remember ever telling Chan about anything from his past. He hopes Felix did not elaborate or anything either. 

  
  


His older neighbor, however, is eyeing him intently. Like assessing the competition. Only this ain't a boxing match.

  
  


"So, you are the one living here."

  
  


The guy points at his door. A statement.

  
  


"Good. Good. Nice to finally meet you, neighbor. I'm Minho."

  
  


Shit, he has to reply. Changbin swallows his spit.

  
  


"Hi. Changbin."

  
  


"Sorry for all the troubles. And for destroying your sleep, I guess. The kids don't listen to me anymore."

  
  


Kids? The snapback boy is his kid? 

  
  


"And no. They are not my actual kids. I'm the oldest one here, so it's kind of a habit?"

  
  


"Uh, okay."

  
  


Changbin is not sure whether he should ask Minho if he can leave. It's getting late.

  
  


Looks like Minho can read him well.

  
  


"Oh, go go. I don't want to stop you for long. Come over some day for breakfast, yeah? Chan makes amazing pancakes."

  
  


"Okay. Thanks."

  
  


Changbin quickly leaves the battle scene with more questions than answers.

  
  


There are definitely more than one people living in the flat next door. The snapback boy, Minho and his 'kids'. Chan either lives here or visits his boyfriend often.

  
  


Wait. Chan.

  
  


Is Changbin living under the rock? How did he never cross paths with Chan on his own goddamn floor. And to think they spend a lot of time together.

  
  


The blame definitely goes to Changbin being so secretive about himself. And not expecting anyone to share their details either. He thinks the less he tells people, the better it is. No wonder their secret games have resulted in this disaster.

  
  


So messy.

  
  


Wait. The moans.

  
  


Was he really hearing Minho and Chan having sex?

  
  


No, it can't be. Chan is pretty quiet. And he would have definitely recognized his voice. And the other guy sounded nothing like Minho. He had a raspier tone.

  
  


What is Changbin doing? Is he really analyzing moans out of everything?

  
  


He needs to start preparing for his quiz. He has to pass this one.

  
  


Moans and neighborhood drama can wait.

  
  


\-----------

  
  


**Pukyong Confessions** @pkconfessions

Following up with our release of Lee Sehoon's case, we received a tip that Miss 'A' was dating another student 'C' from our University before Mr. Lee. Speculations say that they were childhood sweethearts.

@parkj_h00n: A, B, C, D, E, F, G - what is this alphabet soup?

@queengyuri: give us hints!

@loleehyunjae: i have no clue about this one o.O

@oktaek: goodbye baby goodbye~

  
  


Today has been a disaster so far.

  
  


Only God knows why he took the long way to his faculty. Sure, a good walk to kill time had sounded better in his head. But getting hit by a basketball? That wasn't in his routine at all.

  
  


And neither was coming face to face with that cheating asshole.

  
  


So that redhead plays for the University basketball team. Fits him. Perfectly. He looks and acts like a jock indeed.

  
  


At least he had the decency to run to him and apologize. His navy tank and shorts sweaty under the May sun. 

  
  


For once he had no chicks dangling by his arms. Changbin had kept his cool throughout their short exchange. He need not bring any attention to himself. Especially when the jock's teammates were eyeing him like hawks.

  
  


He had just nodded in acceptance. Running out of the way as fast as he could.

  
  


But things had yet to take an ugly turn for him.

  
  


Changbin is furious. 

  
  


Who won't be? The Universitizens were having a field day guessing the so called 'C'. Someone had leaked information about him. 

  
  


The same thing he had been hiding from the world. From himself.

  
  


It's so unfair. Yeonsoo had to go and ruin everything for him when all he ever did was to love her. 

  
  


Love ain't shit.

  
  


Now all Changbin can do is lay low. No discussions. Nothing out of the norms.

  
  


And so he attends all his classes for the day. Thankfully it's Friday. He has a field photography session outside of campus. Perfect distraction from the Lab 3 he had attended earlier.

  
  


Things have been pretty awkward with Chan since that day. 

  
  


Changbin has never asked him explicitly, but the boy looks very sad these days. Hardly interacting with anyone, including him. They have never been really close to share personal problems anyway. Changbin can just hope everything is good in his life.

  
  


He had almost given in to the sympathetic side of him when he had received the unfortunate call. 

  
  


Felix.

  
  


_Changbinnie, don't open your Twitter today!_

  
  


This had made him a hundred times more curious. And of course, he ended up opening it.

  
  


_What the hell._

  
  


_I know! I'm so sorry. I don't know who leaked this information. But I'll try and find out for you._

  
  


_Thanks, Felix. I'm just -_

  
  


_I know. Listen. Act normal. They are just speculating. No one knows shit. So you are safe. For now._

  
  


He truely hopes so.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


There's no better distraction than sea waves.

  
  


Changbin might be scared of deep water, but he for sure loves the sounds of the shore. Beaches. Everything that doesn't require him to go into the water.

  
  


Gwangalli beach.

  
  


Their photography team held their first stop for the month some 3 kilometres from their campus.

  
  


They are here to capture the setting sun. West shore. Red skies with a yellow afterglow. A perfect view behind the mountains.

  
  


Changbin adjusts his microlens to retake his shot. 

  
  


There are only five of them in the troop. Two senior girls - Ara and Soomin, one batchmate - Yejeon, one freshie - Daehyun. And their post graduate mentor - Sungkyu.

  
  


The group is mostly quiet and busy with their own areas. Changbin likes their company. They are fun when needed and know how to respect personal space. 

  
  


Changbin is monitoring the end of the beach. The one with the calmest waves. There is a solo palm tree on top of that small hill. It looks pristine. 

  
  


He decides to sprawl on the sand for a bit. He knows it will take him ages to get sand out of his shorts' pockets. But that's a problem for later. 

  
  


Right now he just wants to forget everything and relax.

  
  


With everything going on in his life, Changbin really wants to quit University and his studies. And everything. 

  
  


Maybe he can stay with his sister in New York City for a change. He can find a job for sure.

  
  


Then again, that will be him running away from inconveniences. The main reason he shifted away from home was to face his fears head on. He can not quit now.

  
  


He can not be the one disappointing his parents.

  
  


It's just two and a half years. Hopefully things would get better.

  
  


"You okay, bud?"

  
  


He looks up. It's Sungkyu. His open shirt flowing in the mild wind.

  
  


His mentor drops on the space next to him. Clapping his hands to get rid of the extra sand.

  
  


"Hmm..I'll be okay."

  
  


Understanding draws into Sungkyu's face. 

  
  


"Ah, relationship problems."

  
  


Changbin wants to laugh. How ironic.

  
  


Maybe he can drop some things. Nothing in detail. Sungkyu is a postgraduate student. He has no time for childish gossip anyway.

  
  


"Past relationship problems. And studies problems. And a lot of other problems actually."

  
  


Sungkyu chuckles.

  
  


"You have science, right? I had some friends taking up science and yeah, they had the same problems like you. The studies part. Not the first one haha."

  
  


"Studies are actually the last thing I'm stressed about. I know I'll pass. It's just-"

  
  


"You don't have to share, you know that right?"

  
  


"Hmm..Thanks, hyung."

  
  


"No issues, kiddos. Now take your time. I will go and take a look at what others are doing. Yeah?"

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


They do a quick fist bump.

  
  


Changbin feels so much lighter now. Even though he did not share anything substantial with his mentor. 

  
  


Sometimes you really just need the reassurance that someone is there to listen to you. And it's enough.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


Days turns into weeks. And things do get better for Changbin.

  
  


Maybe it was him finally visiting NYC for a weekend. It made him feel better indeed. 

  
  


Yujin had been more than happy to give him a tour of Manhattan and the outskirts. And everything worth seeing.

  
  


Her studio was full of character. Just like herself. Decorated with trinkets, buddha mantras and everything that made Yujin. Changbin is glad for his impromptu decision to fly out. Even if it was just for two days.

  
  


And his neighbors were finally behaving for a change. There was no loud noise. No moans. Nothing alarming apart from certain screeches.

  
  


Talking about neighbors, after their first confrontation, he did meet Minho a few times. Mostly in the evenings, after he classes. 

  
  


Minho is a postgraduate student. Korean history. No surprises there. He had declared himself as the oldest of his flatmates.

  
  


Plus, they were five of them living in the opposite flat. Makes sense.

  
  


And Chan was one of them. This made sense as well. Of course, he was rooming with his boyfriend. It's a wonder how Changbin never realized they were living so close.

  
  


Then there was the smallest, and the youngest, Jeongin. 

  
  


The snapback boy.

  
  


The one he keeps on bumping in the lobby till now. He always looks at Changbin in curiosity. As if he wants to say something. But then he just walks away. Without saying a word. Weird.

  
  


Minho had revealed another name - Seungmin. But Changbin has no idea who this person is. 

  
  


It was the last name that finally had Changbin's braincells rolling.

  
  


Hwang Hyunjin.

  
  


Felix and Chan's friend.

  
  


That means Felix had known about this arrangement all along.

  
  


And Changbin had put him on a pedestal just like that. 

  
  


'What the fuck, Felix. You should have told me about Chan and Hyunjin living right next to me.'

  
  


'Whoa, whoa, whoa. In my defense, you never asked. So I kinda assumed you knew? Like you do get along with Chan.'

  
  


'I had no fucking idea. I kept on cursing everyone only to know this. It would have been much easier knocking their door and knocking some sense into them.'

  
  


Changbin has all rights to be this mad.

  
  


And then he has none.

  
  


Felix actually did not know about Changbin's stupidity. He had just wanted to help.

  
  


His anger is totally misplaced.

  
  


"Ah, I'm sorry. I know it's not your fault."

  
  


"It's okay. Something happened?"

  
  


"Naah, I'm just stressed."

  
  


"Yeonsoo thing?"

  
  


"Kinda."

  
  


"Aww baby."

  
  


Changbin would never admit this. But Felix gives the best hugs. He is warm and really soft all over. And so comforting.

  
  


"Wow, I only went out for like two minutes and you've already snatched my boyfriend."

  
  


"Don't be jealous, Sung. Come on, puppy pile!"

  
  


And Jisung really jumps on them. They cuddle like that for hours. Changbin sandwiched between Jisung and Felix. On Jisung's soft bed. Another of their dates.

  
  


Maybe he does love them after all.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


Every curiosity has a limit.

  
  


And it seems like Jeongin has reached his.

  
  


Changbin is preparing to head out when Jeongin knocks at his door.

  
  


It surprises him to no limits.

  
  


He quickly rushes the boy inside his messy place. 

  
  


Changbin knows his dorm is not guest-friendly. But that is solely because he has never had guests over. Not even Felix. They usually keep it on campus or at Jisung's place.

  
  


No wonder there are empty packets all over the kitchen counter. And his clothes from today lying lazily on the armrest of his solo couch. 

  
  


Changbin quickly throws the dirty laundry out of the way to make room for the boy. He takes the solo chair across from it.

  
  


"Hey."

  
  


"Hi."

  
  


So awkward. 

  
  


Changbin really isn't a people's person. Seems like Jeongin isn't one either. 

  
  


"We haven't formally met yet, I guess."

  
  


"Yeah."

  
  


"Umm. I'm Seo Changbin. Second year Microbiology. Hi?"

  
  


"I know who you are actually. And no, it's not from Minho hyung. Or Chan hyung."

  
  


"Ah?"

  
  


"I think I should return the favor first before we talk business."

  
  


What?

  
  


This kid has business. With him?

  
  


"So, I'm Kim Jeongin. First year, Law. And now to the main matter. I kinda know some stuff about you. And I have a proposal for you."

  
  


"What kind of proposal?"

  
  


"First tell me. Do you have my full attention?"

  
  


"Uh, yes?"

  
  


"Good. Now, can you do something for me?"

  
  


"Why would I do something for you?"

  
  


"Because I know your deal with Yeonsoo."

  
  


How the fuck.

  
  


Literally, how? This boy is a fresher. How does he know about Changbin's business?

  
  


"I don't know what you are talking about."

  
  


Changbin has to keep his ground. This tiny boy can not intimidate him.

  
  


"Oh, you very well know that. And look, I don't have anything against you. Just a simple bartner."

  
  


"I don't believe you."

  
  


"You should thank me, actually. There someone out there exposing your dirty laundry for everyone to see. I thankfully had some controls so I hid the main information. Even other admins don't know 'C' is actually you."

  
  


What?

  
  


"You run the University confessions page?"

  
  


"Correction. I am one of the admins."

  
  


"This is all so unbelievable. I don't know what to think…"

  
  


"I get you. That's why I don't have your name out in the open. The perpetrator had named you in bold letters."

  
  


"Why would you do that for me?"

  
  


"Naah, I would have done that for anyone."

  
  


"So, why this barter?"

  
  


"Because, I'm sure the perpetrator would try to do this another time. And I can not control what other admins do. I would have to use more time and brains to keep your name out of it. Don't you think I deserve something in return for putting my reputation at stake?"

  
  


It did make sense. And then again it did not.

  
  


"What do you want?"

  
  


"Date my brother."

  
  


Wait.

  
  


What?

  
  


He takes it back, this deal made zero sense.

  
  


"Why would I date your brother? What the literal fuck?"

  
  


'No, I mean. Fake date my brother."

  
  


"I don't even know your brother."

  
  


"We can change that. Give me your phone."

  
  


Changbin works on autopilot. He has realized he has no control over himself in front of his intimidating neighbors.

  
  


"Here you go. I have added both mine and my brother's number. You can contact him anytime."

  
  


"Wait. Who all will know this? I mean if I agree to it."

  
  


"Oh, you will. But take your time. And no one else can know. I will not say a word. Promise. Keep yours on your end. Or you know the consequences."

  
  


"Is your brother actually okay with it?"

  
  


"He needs it. I will head out now. Nice doing business with you, Changbin."

  
  


And Jeongin is out of his door in seconds leaving Changbin in complete shock.

  
  


What had happened just now?

  
  


\-------------

  
  


God bless people who are fast in making good decisions.

  
  


Changbin is prone to taking forever going through the options, weighing pros and cons before deciding on something. And it still turns out to be wrong. Most of the time. He has to accept that.

  
  


And this one is not just about dinner choices.

  
  


It's about relationships.

  
  


Fake relationship. But still.

  
  


He thinks and thinks and thinks some more.

  
  


Is he really prepared for all the eyes on him? Maybe. It would be better than being a 'loser' ex-boyfriend at least.

  
  


Can he really be lovey-dovey to this guy? No way. PDA has to be written off their works.

  
  


What if it slips down to his family? It's okay. They were cool with Yeonsoo. They really don't care about who he dates as long as his grades are good.

  
  


What will he tell Jisung? And Felix? He has to add some truth to it. Jisung would be easier to fool as he stays away. Hopefully, Felix will not meddle much.

  
  


Is he really ready for this step? Changbin is shit scared. Sure he has had a few public relationships, but none of them ended smoothly. Last one was a disaster. Maybe this one being fake will help? They don't have to open up about anything. And keep everything just for the show.

  
  


This should be okay.

  
  


This 'fake-dating' might help him clear his name. Who knows what that person is trying to do to him.

  
  


Changbin still has more than 2 years to survive in this University. 

  
  


He takes a deep breath. 

  
  


Okay, this can not be that bad.

  
  


His iPhone is plugged on the bedside. There are only a couple of notifications. App updates. His Amazon delivery has been dispatched.

  
  


Contacts.

  
  


Kim Seungmin. 

  
  


An empty iMessage box.

  
  


Don't chicken out now.

  
  


Me: hi

Me: is this kim seungmin?

  
  


He has to make sure. What if Jeongin was pranking him?

  
  


No instant reply.

  
  


Good.

  
  


He is such a fool. Not everyone is free on a Saturday. At least in the evening. 

  
  


He will wait.

  
  


Evening turns into night and then Sunday morning. Yet no reply.

  
  


The anxiety is killing Changbin.

  
  


He is not someone who is glued to his phone 24/7. But the anticipation has him on toes for the entire day. He keeps on checking his phone every five minutes. 

  
  


It's okay. This Kim Seungmin might have been busy.

  
  


Sunday evening and Changbin loses it completely.

  
  


He can not wait for it anymore. 

  
  


He pulls out his keys and runs down the stairs to his parked Skoda. He needs a breather.

  
  


The drive around the city calms him a bit. At least Changbin has something else to hyperfocus on. The idiots on the streets.

  
  


There's a three story 7-Eleven on the 37th street. He might as well get some grocery and food stocked.

  
  


He walks around to pick up some familiar and new snacks. Shrimp heads, durian, milk tea cans, chocostubs, frozen pizzas, dark chocolate. There's not a lot of stuff he can store in his mini fridge, this should do for now.

  
  


It has gotten darker now. 

  
  


6:30 PM.

  
  


Jisung's place is just round the corner. He should drop by to say hi. 

  
  


A neat modern apartment building on a mini hill. Gray exteriors, big french windows. Jisung's taste.

  
  


His loft is on the fourth floor. At least the building has an elevator.

  
  


Changbin rings the doorbell. Once, twice.

  
  


No response.

  
  


Jisung's out? But his lights are on?

  
  


He waits a bit. Patiently. One minute and the intercom buzzes.

  
  


Only a head is visible.

  
  


Dark, tight curls. Tousled.

  
  


Of, fucking, course.

  
  


"Open the door, Felix. It's me."

  
  


His face is visible now. As clearly as a pixelated intercom can reflect. Big eyes peeking directly into the camera.

  
  


Then he moves away. Probably to open the front door.

  
  


Click.

  
  


"Sorry. Come in."

  
  


He is panting. Only a bit. His loose shirt too big on him. It's Jisung's. SpongeBob SquarePants. Changbin has a similar one in his closet. They had bought it together.

  
  


The living space looks untouched. Thank God, he doesn't want to accidentally sit or step into body fluids.

  
  


He makes himself comfortable on Jisung's couch. Plush and comfy. He remembers all the nights he had spent here crying after his breakup. 

  
  


"Got some snacks. Chocopie, your favorite."

  
  


Felix takes the packet from him. Grinning. He quickly opens it up to pop the chocolate cookie in his mouth.

  
  


"You are the best, Binnie. Mwah."

  
  


"Yeah, yeah."

  
  


"Quit rolling your eyes, I know you want to kiss me too."

  
  


"Over my grave."

  
  


"Aw. Then let me kill you quickly hehe. By the way, Jisung is in the shower."

  
  


"I know."

  
  


"And thank you, I guess. For, umm."

  
  


Why is Felix suddenly this shy?

  
  


"What?"

  
  


"We did it. Like yesterday. And it was soo good. So. We did it again. Today."

  
  


Wait.

  
  


They only had sex for the first time yesterday? Jisung really chickened out for four whole months? That too when he had Felix ready and on the same page?

  
  


Changbin is not going to let Jisung live this one.

  
  


Also, Felix's tweets from weeks ago. It might have been over something else. He is overanalyzing stuff.

  
  


Oh. 

  
  


Maybe Felix can help him? He is the social butterfly in their friend circle. 

  
  


"Lix.."

  
  


"Hmmm?"

  
  


"Hypothetically, how do you know if someone is avoiding you?"

  
  


Felix looks up from the half empty snacks packet. This might have peaked his attention. Changbin really loves digging a hole for himself.

  
  


"Oh my. Do you like someone?"

  
  


"Whoa. Where did that come from? I never mentioned any interest. It was a genuine question."

  
  


"Getting defensive..first sign of attraction. Hmm.."

  
  


"Never mind. I will ask someone else."

  
  


"Wait, wait, wait. I'm listening. Tell me what troubles you."

  
  


Changbin raises his eyebrow. Should he? Or should he not?

  
  


His predicament is saved by Jisung walking into the room.

  
  


"Changbin, to whom do I owe this pleasure?"

  
  


"Just one day and you've already lost your brains. Why am I friends with such idiots?"

  
  


"Hey!"

  
  


"Babe, Binnie has an interesting question for us."

  
  


Trust Felix to gaslight the situation.

  
  


Time to drop. If he wants to save himself from the interrogation.

  
  


"Naah, I have none. Anyway, I need to go. Paper's due on Wednesday."

  
  


"You are no fun."

  
  


Jisung just laughs. He is already used to Felix's antics. And Changbin's too.

  
  


Seems like Changbin has no other option then.

  
  


\------------

  
  


Me: hi

Me: jeongin

  
  


Kim Jeongin: Yes?

  
  


Rude.

  
  


Me: are you sure you gave me the right contact info?

  
  


Kim Jeongin: I can see and reply to your messages well

  
  


Me: not you

Me: seungmin

  
  


Kim Jeongin: His contact is correct too

Kim Jeongin: He will reply

Kim Jeongin: Good luck

  
  


Changbin hopes at least his brother is easy to deal with. Or this arrogance could run in their genes.

  
  


No.

  
  


He shouldn't be judging anyone like this. Especially when he doesn't know them.

  
  


Maybe the brother is genuinely busy with his studies. Happens. Changbin has had those days too. He had cut his interactions with Jisung and his family for two whole months during one of his peaks. 

  
  


He hopes Seungmin answers him before he gives up on this deal altogether.

  
  


Jeongin can not blame him if it's his brother's fault.

  
  


\------------

  
  


Fortunately. Or unfortunately. Changbin receives a reply the next morning.

  
  


He had been getting ready for his 8 AM classes. 

  
  


Kim Seungmin: yes, it is seungmin

Kim Seungmin: do i know you?

  
  


Please don't be a jerk.

  
  


Me: hi

Me: jeongin gave me your number

  
  


Kim Seungmin: oh

Kim Seungmin: meet me near artfac

Kim Seungmin: 12:30 pm

  
  


Me: can it be later?

Me: i have classes

  
  


Kim Seungmin: cool, just text me when you are around

  
  


Me: okay

  
  


And that's it.

  
  


Whoa. Changbin can breathe better now. This was easy. 

  
  


Now, he will just meet this guy and discuss the 'do's' and the 'don'ts'. 

  
  


Hopefully, this will be enough to keep that person off his tail.

  
  


What has Changbin come to? He is willing to exchange his soul to keep his past hidden. This is why you should never ever fall for anyone.

  
  


The day is too stretched out today. Maybe because he is anticipating his meeting with Seungmin too much. 

  
  


This is not a date. 

  
  


They are just meeting to discuss the arrangement.

  
  


It takes forever for the clock to turn 4 PM.

  
  


Thank God, Changbin had already texted the guy about the delay. He did not want any bad impression.

  
  


This is not a date.

  
  


What the hell.

  
  


He is out the minute his last class gets over. So much so for not being impatient.

  
  


The art faculty or ARTFAC is three buildings down his own. Nearby sports grounds. Changbin has not been here often. Only when he wants to take the longer route to his faculty. Or to take a walk around the campus to clear his head.

  
  


It's a place he would avoid hanging out in. If he would hang out that is. Between his classes, photography sessions and self studies, he hardly gets time to himself. This semester is harder than the past two; it's not good news. At all.

  
  


Changbin wonders how he will manage this 'fake dating' on top of his other commitments.

  
  


But then again, it's fake. They only have to keep appearances in the public and it's going to be fine.

  
  


Just his partner should be cooperative.

  
  


This 'Seungmin' guy seemed understanding though. He had been adjusting to the change in the timing. And his text-speak was okay too.

  
  


Plus, the guy also needs this arrangement, according to Jeongin.

  
  


But why exactly?

  
  


The ARTFAC looks as fancy as ever. Upside down rainbow umbrellas in the walkway. Red textured walls. Hanging origami art. Very creative. Very inspiring. 

  
  


They did take one photography session here. Sculpture Exhibition. Sungkyu had them cover the ongoing event for the University blog. The pictures had come out great.

  
  


The building is still buzzing with life. Students running here and there. Boxes, cardboards, papers, fabrics. Art supplies.

  
  


Hyunjin's classes also happen in this particular faculty. Well most of them. He still has to share some in literature faculty with Felix. 

  
  


Speaking of Hyunjin, he has not crossed paths with the boy in a long time. His lunch dates with Felix and Chan have been reduced to none. Felix says Hyunjin is busy. 

  
  


Maybe. 

  
  


The fashion student had mentioned his upcoming ramp reveal or something. And Changbin knows there's something up with Chan. 

  
  


4:30 PM. Their meeting time. 

  
  


Changbin stands by the entrance. Just to make sure he doesn't miss the guy. 

  
  


Oh, he should tell him about what he is wearing. There are people around.

  
  


Me: hey, im by the gate 1

Me: blue checks shirt, glasses

  
  


Then he waits.

  
  


It's still sunny outside. Late afternoon on a hot Summer day. His flannel does help someway. The advantage of wearing clothes that don't touch your skin directly.

  
  


With nothing else to do and mind being on 'waiting' mode, Changbin knows he will land up on Twitter. Honestly, his favorite pass time ever.

  
  


10 minutes. 

  
  


He has already caught up on the latest scoops on Yonhap. Some compelling arguments. Social events. Some propaganda. It's fun when you are reading them. Not so much when you are in that position.

  
  


He knows about Dispatch. Yeonsoo had an interest in knowing celebrity gossip. How ironic.

  
  


But what Pukyong Confessions is doing is much worse than Dispatch. Sure Changbin has no impact on the rest of Korea, the issue will be very much local. Then again, he has no professional lawyers and PR teams to help him clear his name. He will be branded forever.

  
  


How he wishes he could get out of this University. But his father won't allow Changbin. And he has no guts or money to survive on his own.

  
  


Getting his name omitted from the list is the only thing he can think of. If Jeongin is right and there are people behind leaking his past.

  
  


What would anyone get by doing it?

  
  


And who knows him well enough to do this? 

  
  


Yeonsoo?

  
  


But she has her name out in the open. And anyway why would she care about some petty local page? 

  
  


Yeonsoo is someone with high ambitions. If she had wanted to create unnecessary drama for the public, she wouldn't have broken up with him in private. Going as far as keeping their 'relationship' a secret.

  
  


It doesn't make any sense.

  
  


Then who else knows and could benefit from this 'scandal'?

  
  


Any of his old schoolmates? But him and Yeonsoo weren't public even in High School.

  
  


Yeonsoo's friends?

  
  


Hina and Nayun are both studying in Canada. He doubts they'll have interest in spilling their tea for fun.

  
  


His friends?

  
  


He has a total of 3 friends. Jisung would never do this. Felix is just trying to help. And Wooyoung doesn't even know they've broken up. Changbin hasn't had a chance to detail his life to his old childhood friend. They've yet to speak apart from 5 minutes quick catch-up calls. 

  
  


Changbin can't blame him. Wooyoung is very busy with his wife and toddler in Seoul. And working 3 shifts a day is hard on him and his family.

  
  


So who else?

  
  


His father?

  
  


What is Changbin even thinking?

  
  


30 minutes.

  
  


Now where the hell is this guy?

  
  


Me: where are you?

Me: ive been waiting for half an hour

Me: ill wait 10 more minutes max

  
  


No reply.

  
  


This is so annoying.

  
  


Another five minutes vanish with the setting sun.

  
  


Instagram. Twitter. Instagram again.

  
  


There are hardly people around. The day has already ended for most of the students.

  
  


Okay, five more minutes.

  
  


Maybe the guy is occupied.

  
  


He takes the bench. His legs hurt now.

  
  


There's no new person.

  
  


Well, except for a redhead who is running towards the faculty. College basketball jersey. A backpack. Wet hair.

  
  


He is very familiar.

  
  


Wait.

  
  


He is that cheating asshole. Wow, isn't it too early to go victim-hunting? He should have at least dressed up for a change. No girl would be impressed by his attire. Or a boy. Maybe.

  
  


The guy enters straight into the building, unrestrained. Of course, he knows the faculty. He might have had multiple flings here.

  
  


Enough of people watching. Changbin is a man on a mission.

  
  


Which is failing. Terribly.

  
  


Last chance.

  
  


Message won't do now. He should call him.

  
  


Changbin looks up 'Kim Seungmin' in the directory. And takes a deep breath. It's a fellow student like him. He can interact. Or scold him Whatever.

  
  


Ring.

  
  


Ring.

  
  


_"Hello."_

  
  


The rushed voice answers. As if he is running. High-pitch.

  
  


"Kim Seungmin. I have been waiting for a long time. Tell me if you are coming or not. Don't waste my time."

  
  


_"Whoa. Slow down. I'm…….here. Inside the hall? I can't see you?"_

  
  


So he is inside. 

  
  


"I'm waiting by the entrance. First bench. Did you even see my message?"

  
  


_"Ah, sorry. I missed it. Give me two minutes."_

  
  


Changbin stands up. Nerves higher than he would admit to. 

  
  


It's not a fucking date.

  
  


It's not Seungmin coming out of the entranceway. It's the redhead.

  
  


Okay. He will wait another minute.

  
  


Only he doesn't need that.

  
  


The redhead comes and stands in front of him.

  
  


Things fall back into place.

  
  


Changbin is doomed.

  
  


The redhead seems confused. Eyes traveling from top to bottom. What the fuck? He really has the audacity to check him out?

  
  


"You are…...Changbin?"

  
  


"Correct. And you are a serial cheater."

  
  


This arrangement can never take off. Changbin would never give his soul, fake or not, to a cheater like him. He has had enough experience in that area. Not another one.

  
  


"Uh?"

  
  


Shock looks great on the redhead's face. Only if Changbin was petty enough to expose this guy to the Confessions page. His partner must have had high hopes on him.

  
  


But he won't do that.

  
  


Especially because he is also a victim of college gossip.

  
  


Who this redhead dates or cheats on is none of his business anyway.

  
  


Unless he gets pitched to be 'fake dating' a serial dater. Which is now.

  
  


Like seriously, why does this person even need a fake date? As a beard? Or to shield whatever illegal and immoral stuff he has been hiding?

  
  


Strange.

  
  


"See, I don't care who you date or cheat on. I don't think I can be someone's side chick while they are already in a relationship."

  
  


"What relationship?"

  
  


"I don't know. You tell me. I have seen you 5 times with 5 different people. Don't you think your girlfriend, or boyfriend, will be upset?"

  
  


"I'm not dating anyone?"

  
  


"What bullshit."

  
  


Changbin really wasted his time here.

  
  


Wait.

  
  


If the redhead is Kim Seungmin. He lives in the same complex as his. The flat next door.

  
  


Oh God.

  
  


"See. I can't fake date you. I had no idea you were the one living with Minho. In the flat next to mine. I would have never agreed to fake date you."

  
  


The realization is clear on the redhead, Seungmin's face. Nice, he is a dumb jock. Stereotypes are there for a reason.

  
  


"Jeongin sent you?"

  
  


"Good one, Sherlock."

  
  


"Don't be cocky. I wouldn't date, fake date, you either."

  
  


"Well, excellent for me. Now, if we are done then I will take my leave?"

  
  


"I can drop you. I have to go back and change anyway."

  
  


What a gentleman. As if.

  
  


"No, thanks. I'm not one of your damsels in distress. Don't you have people to make out with? You seem pretty popular with college hotties."

  
  


"I could kiss you here, if you want."

  
  


The reply surprises Changbin to no ends. He is suddenly alert. This guy really has no shame.

  
  


"What the fuck? Like really? Anyway, goodbye. Hope we never meet again."

  
  


Seungmin chuckles at that. Cocky and confident. Changbin hates it. 

  
  


"We live a door away, babe. You can't avoid my kisses for long."

  
  


"Fuck off."

  
  


Changbin is really the crown prince of the land of bad decision-making. 

  
  


No doubts.

  
  


He just wants to go back to his room and sleep. This is horrible. So horrible.

  
  


Why a cheater of all the people?

  
  


If what Yeonsoo did wasn't enough.


	2. Are cherry blossoms really that pretty, you idiots?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And things get worse for Changbin. Of course.

"I'm calling it off."

  
  


"Wait, why?"

  
  


"It is...It's your brother. I don't think I can do anything with him."

  
  


"You said you don't know him?"

  
  


"I wish I did not. God. Listen. Thank you for your concern, but I can't do it."

  
  


"I say you think about it, Changbin. It's not as light as you think. I'm trying to shield you as long as I can."

  
  


"It makes no fucking sense. Why are you trying to protect me? You don't even know me!"

  
  


"I'm a decent human being, that's why. And aren't I taking something from you as well?"

  
  


"Exactly! I'm sure your brother has people lined over to fuck. Why are you dragging me into it?"

  
  


"Because he needs it."

  
  


"What the hell? For your information, your brother also refused this fake dating shit. Does he even know what you are doing this? Looking for targets to set him up with?"

  
  


"That is totally not what is happening, Changbin. Calm down.'

  
  


It's funny how a younger guy is dictating him like this. Jeongin is calm. A hundred times calmer than Changbin is. He is sipping on his Frappuccino. They look like two friends meeting over a cup of coffee. Nothing suspicious. 

  
  


Only they are not friends. Just acquaintances. Meeting over a failed deal.

  
  


It's not that serious. He needs to stop seeing everyone with a critical eye. This is not healthy for his mind. His heart.

  
  


Changbin goes for his Americano. One sip. Two sips. Clear attempt to calm his insides out.

  
  


It's not their regular café. They are not even inside of the campus.

  
  


_Jesters'_ is a quirky little spot near Changbin's home. Very unknown. Especially to the Pukyong lot. No student would travel 30 minutes for a burger. Maybe they would but Changbin is yet to see one here. He is a frequent visitor. Yeonsoo used to hate the psychedelic patterns here. But he loves it. The Mac n Cheese here is to die for.

  
  


There is one portion of bacon Mac n Cheese sitting on the table. Some wedges. 

  
  


Jeongin is not a picky eater. Thankfully. 

  
  


It's better that the younger guy asked him to meet somewhere farther. This way he can stay away from campus gossip. How ironic.

  
  


"Okay. I'm okay now. Tell me what you are planning."

  
  


"I'm not planning anything."

  
  


Jeongin is not the type to budge. He has clear statements. Stuff you would be scared to cross-question. No wonder he is going for a law degree.

  
  


But he is not here to make friends or admire how headstrong the person sitting in front of him is.

  
  


He is here to refute whatever Jeongin is planning that involves him. And that guy, Seungmin.

  
  


"See, I really don't care what you and your brother's business is. Please go find someone else to play houses with. I don't have time and energy to do this."

  
  


Jeongin nods. Understanding. Is he, really?

  
  


"Okay, I will let you go for you. But think about it. You both will benefit from this partnership."

  
  


Spoken like a true lawyer. Changbin's life is a business deal now. Great.

  
  


'Thank you for your time, Jeongin."

  
  


He can't help but be sarcastic. Jeongin smirks, totally in the mood.

  
  


"Pleasure is mine, Mr. Seo."

  
  


For someone who dresses up like a teenager, Jeongin sure is a scary guy. Changbin would think a hundred times before coming into his bad books.

  
  


The brothers have totally different aura. Kim Jeongin comes across as calculative and brainy. While Kim Seungmin is laidback. And uncaring. And a fuckboy with no regards to people's feelings. 

  
  


And they both live in the frat house next to his dorm. 

  
  


Excellent.

  
  


\--------------

  
  


Midterms come and go. Soon enough they all disburse to their homes.

  
  


Changbin had never thought he would be this excited to go back to home. But here he is, packing all the essentials into a small duffel bag. He need not bring more stuff anyway. He has everything he needs in his childhood room.

  
  


Contact lens box. His beloved wrist watch. Three pairs of boxers. Two undershirts. One pair of jeans. Slippers. Phone charger. Earphones. And he is done.

  
  


It's Summer. He can't wait to go dipping in his swimming pool. It's been a while.

  
  


He is expecting a call from his mother's driver. Changbin had decided to drop his car for the trip. It's for a week anyway.

  
  


What he did not expect was frequent knocks on his door. 

  
  


He did not give his dorm number to the driver, who is it then?

  
  


Changbin opens the door to a slightly disheveled Felix.

  
  


And Hyunjin.

  
  


Hyunjin?

  
  


"Hey, hey hey!"

  
  


"Hi Lix, Hyunjin. Come?"

  
  


Felix is wearing his regular clothes, a striped rainbow shirt and high waisted pants. But he has the power to make everything look great on him. 

  
  


Hyunjin on the other hand is dressed for a game. Graphic t-shirt, chains, distressed denims, boots, red Summer coat. Light makeup. He looks amazing.

  
  


They both look very excited for something.

  
  


Changbin sits them on the lone sofa. Leaving for the micro fridge. He has some soda laying somewhere.

  
  


"Here you go."

  
  


Felix takes it up happily. It's his favorite.

  
  


"Thanks, Changbin. I can't take it today actually. I have a runway in three days."

  
  


Oh yes. His event is this week. Felix had shared the details, he might have the flier in his desk drawer. 

  
  


"How is it going though? Sorry, I could not speak to you guys a lot. Just submitted all my papers yesterday. Hell week indeed."

  
  


"It's okay haha. I understand. But it's going great! I have most of my garments ready. Doing womenswear this time. Russian Roulette theme."

  
  


Changbin has no idea what he is talking about but he still nods in appreciation. Hyunjin is speaking in gestures, clearly pumped up about his showcase.

  
  


"And there are like 5 full garments. Organdy skirt, embellished jackets and bustiers. It took me two months to complete them but they look great!"

  
  


"Yes!! Hyunjin's collection is going to rule the stage, I have seen them first hand."

  
  


"Wow, that sounds amazing."

  
  


Changbin is genuinely looking forward to seeing Hyunjin's talent.

  
  


"You are coming right? What I am even saying, you have to come. I have booked seats for you all. Including Jisung."

  
  


"Aw, thanks, Jinnie. I'll speak to Jisung today, he has his last exams tomorrow. Should be fine! Anyway, I'm sure he would love to meet you.'

  
  


'Really? Yay! Thanks bub."

  
  


"No issues hehe. Anyway, Changbin. When are you leaving for home?"

  
  


Technically anytime now? Where the hell is his driver?

  
  


"I was actually waiting for my driver."

  
  


"Aah. Jinnie needed your help. Like his garments are really heavy and his Volkswagen is under repair."

  
  


"But it's okay, Changbin. We'll look for something else. You don't have to do this."

  
  


Technically Changbin can go to his home any time. Hyunjin needs his help.

  
  


How can he let Hyunjin suffer?

  
  


"No no no. I can help you out. Let me message home real quick."

  
  


"You would do that for me? Really? You are such a sweetheart aah."

  
  


Hyunjin is bubbling with joy. Pretty eyes sparkling. 

  
  


Damn. Changbin hopes his driver hasn't started yet. He is not ready to hear his dad shout at him. Again.

  
  


Me: maa

Me: i will have to stay back for a bit

Me: some pending stuff with the course

  
  


Felix has left his seat and is wandering in his kitchen now. Probably looking for some snacks.

  
  


"It's in the first cupboard. To the left. I only have banana chips left though."

  
  


This friend jumps in his place, surprised by the call out. This is so Felix. So much like a cat. Fierce yet soft. 

  
  


"Thank you, baby!"

  
  


Ah right. Felix and his endearing terms. It's a wonder how Jisung trusts him this much. Felix is very flirty with and without them. 

  
  


But that's none of Changbin's concern. 

  
  


He would be there for Jisung if he needs his shoulder though.

  
  


Stop.

  
  


Felix is his friend. What is he even thinking?

  
  


Ding.

  
  


It's his mom.

  
  


Maa: Oh, it's okay

Maa: We were running late anyway

Maa: Have fun

  
  


Cleared.

  
  


"Hey Hyunjin."

  
  


Hyunjin looks up from his phone. 

  
  


"We can get going."

  
  


"Thanks!"

  
  


Changbin asks them for a few minutes as he changes into his outside wear. He needs to be at least presentable if he is going to be at Hyunjin's rehearsals.

  
  


An oversized peach shirt and black slacks. This should do for now.

  
  


Felix is alone when Changbin comes out. He is playing with the TV remote, feet up on the sofa.

  
  


"Wow, you look good."

  
  


"Thanks."

  
  


"You really have a crush. Yeah?"

  
  


"Don't say bullshit, Lix."

  
  


"Aw. You made your hair. You never do your hair. Unless it's Yeonsoo. Oops."

  
  


"Shut up."

  
  


"Tell me, tell me. I can set them up with you, if you want hehe."

  
  


Felix is wiggling his eyebrows. So annoying. And untrue.

  
  


He doesn't have a crush on Hyunjin.

  
  


Or does he?

  
  


They don't get time to speak as Hyunjin barges into the apartment. Hands full of things. Some files, a box? Loose fabric draped over his shoulders.

  
  


Jeongin is just behind him. One hand controlling a big ass suitcase.

  
  


It looks messy.

  
  


"Guys, let's go down? Changbin, where have you parked your car?"

  
  


"Basement 1, 521. Come, I'll help you."

  
  


He takes some of the items off Hyunjin and leads the way.

  
  


They all place the materials carefully in the trunk and on half of the backseat.

  
  


"Felix will go shotgun. I have to make sure they don't drop down."

  
  


Hyunjin gestures to the loosely packed items in his car. Makes sense.

  
  


Felix happily takes over the front seat. They generally don't take Changbin's Skoda - Jisung, Felix and him. Jisung's hatchback is classy enough for all of them. He is not sure if it's Felix's first time riding his car.

  
  


The ride is slow. Very very slow. 

  
  


Not only the campus has 30km/hr guidelines. Changbin has to purposely drive slowly to make sure Hyunjin's stuff is not harmed.

  
  


It's embarrassing to watch even pedestrians walking faster than his goddamn car.

  
  


It takes them 15 minutes to reach the destination. 

  
  


The ARTFAC.

  
  


It looks way different from what it was on Changbin's last visit. Livelier. 

  
  


The entrance has a couple banners hanging - _The Spectrum_. The fliers had mentioned the name of the showcase.

  
  


Looks like students from all years are participating in it. Freshers, seniors, graduates. 

  
  


Hyunjin leads them to a big hall. Other participants have their assigned enclosures based on the year they are in. Hyunjin's enclosure is second to last. It's a big one with a platform and some chairs. There are some mannequins lined up against the wall. Two big, two small.

  
  


It's Changbin's first time watching the preparations behind any show. It's busy. People are talking, shouting at each other. There is some instrumental song playing in the background. 

  
  


They drop the suitcase and other stuff on the table and Hyunjin rushes to sort through them.

  
  


"Lixie, darling, can you please check my phone and tell me if Prof. Ham has any message for me?"

  
  


"Okay!"

  
  


Changbin is not sure what he has to do now. So he takes a seat and decides to look around.

  
  


He watches Felix and Hyunjin fumble through the pins and use steam iron to smoothen out any pending crease lines. The models will apparently arrive in 30 minutes so they need to be ready with the garments.

  
  


"Shit shit shit."

  
  


It's Hyunjin cursing out loud.

  
  


"What's wrong?"

  
  


"I forgot my trims bag in my room. I'm fucked now."

  
  


Changbin decides to step in. 

  
  


"Hey, I can get it for you."

  
  


"Oh, you are a Godsend. It's in my bedside drawer. Jeongin will be at home. I'll quickly let him know."

  
  


"Cool, I will be right back."

  
  


Changbin can see Felix's interested gaze on him and decides to ignore it.

  
  


Well.

  
  


He rides back smoothly. In his own pace. It takes him less than 5 minutes.

  
  


Ding.

  
  


Ding.

  
  


No response.

  
  


Hyunjin was saying Jeongin is inside?

  
  


Maybe he is busy.

  
  


He rings the bell anyway. It's urgent.

  
  


He can hear footsteps. Finally.

  
  


But it's not Jeongin who opens the door.

  
  


It's Seungmin.

  
  


Fresh out of the shower. Head dripping water. Bare-chested, only a towel covering his lower body. 

  
  


Why?

  
  


"Oh, it's you."

  
  


Seungmin is painfully mundane. So so painful. They are not friends discussing the weather. They don't even like each other.

  
  


And Hyunjin needs him.

  
  


Or his trims bag. 

  
  


Whatever.

  
  


"Move. I need some stuff here."

  
  


"My. You do remember I live here, right?"

  
  


"Yes. But I'm not here to entertain you. Move."

  
  


Seungmin chuckles but lets him inside. 

  
  


Their flat is as beautiful as the first time he saw it. So Instagram-able. 

  
  


Spacious living area. Neat couches. Half messy but 'better than his' kitchen. Multiple doors leading to bedrooms and bathrooms. 5 doors in total. So maybe three rooms and 2 bathrooms?

  
  


Wait, he did not ask Hyunjin which of these was his.

  
  


He will have to speak to Seungmin again. 

  
  


Such bad luck.

  
  


Seungmin is by the kitchen. Working on his coffeemaker. Still in a towel. Back wider than anyone's he has seen in recent times.

  
  


"Hey, do you know which is Hyunjin's room?"

  
  


The redhead turns to look at him. Brow raised.

  
  


Then he gestures to the room on the right. 

  
  


"Thanks."

  
  


"You are welcome, Sweetie."

  
  


Changbin wants to puke. 

  
  


"Get lost, you fucking creep."

  
  


"Really? May I remind you where you are? And creep? Well there's no one else in the apartment. So…"

  
  


Focus. Don't get distracted. Hyunjin is waiting.

  
  


"I don't have energy to fight with you. Now let me get what I need and I'll never step a foot in this house. Especially if you are around."

  
  


Seungmin goes back to his coffeemaker. Laugh so high-pitched Changbin can hear it from Hyunjin's room.

  
  


The space itself is very Hyunjin. Clean walls. Aesthetics. But there's a cramped study table next to the window. Post its' everywhere. Probably his roommate's. Hyunjin's course doesn't have this level theory subjects, if he remembers correctly. There is a full-length mirror with vanity lights above it sitting on the corner of the room. You can tell which side is Hyunjin's. It's really pretty. 

  
  


Now the drawer.

  
  


Changbin directly moves to Hyunjin's side table. The bracelets and trinkets on top of it make it clear that he is correct.

  
  


First drawer. Some notebooks, glue, color pencils, stencils. His art supplies.

  
  


Nope.

  
  


Second drawer. Empty delivery boxes, cosmetics.

  
  


Nope.

  
  


Third drawer.

  
  


Fuck.

  
  


It has lube and condoms.

  
  


What?

  
  


He mentally calculates the placement of the room. 

  
  


Oh shit. 

  
  


This is the room. His ultimate torture phase. 

  
  


It was Hyunjin?

  
  


He was hearing Hyunjin's moans?

  
  


He quickly closes the drawer and moves to the next. He should not be thinking this. 

  
  


The bag is fortunately in the last drawer. Now time to run away.

  
  


He bumps directly into a bare chest. Seungmin is a head taller than him.

  
  


"What the fuck are you doing?"

  
  


"Going to my room?"

  
  


"This is your room?"

  
  


"Yes? Why are you so surprised?"

  
  


Oh no. No no no.

  
  


He has seen and heard enough. Now he will handle the last stuff and go back home.

  
  


Changbin can't handle this shit show anymore.

  
  


\--------------

  
  


His home is as it was before.

  
  


Quiet and relaxing.

  
  


A nice change of pace for Changbin.

  
  


Here he would not have to worry about campus gossip or horny neighbors.

  
  


He can just lay in the pool and forget about the world.

  
  


As he is doing now.

  
  


It's midnight but no one cares. Summers are getting hotter by the year and he will take up as much time as he can before he goes back to the dorm.

  
  


Everything is so fast-paced, overwhelming.

  
  


His phone vibrates on the platform besides him. Changbin quickly dries up his hands.

  
  


Jisung: You'll be going to the fest right?

  
  


Right. The fest. Changbin wishes he could just jump into the pool and forget the last two days ever happened.

  
  


Me: yeah

Me: most probably

  
  


Jisung: Come

Jisung: Felix wants us to

  
  


Fucking whipped.

  
  


Me: ok

Me: pick me up up at 6 i guess

  
  


Jisung: Sure, thanks

  
  


There's no running now.

  
  


\--------------

  
  


Choosing an outfit for the showcase is more difficult than Changbin had initially thought.

  
  


Especially when he had to take pictures and send it to Felix for approval.

  
  


Why exactly is he even doing this?

  
  


His attire should have at his accord. But apparently this was a big event and Felix had wanted them to 'dress-up at least for this one'. It's cute how involved his best friend's boyfriend is in his appearance. Because it doesn't even matter what he wears now.

  
  


He has no one to impress.

  
  


He had, but not any longer.

  
  


Changbin sure has some bad choices in people.

  
  


_"Wear that black coat!"_

  
  


"It's really hot outside, Felix."

  
  


_"But the auditorium is gonna be air-conditioned! Wear it, it looks good on you."_

  
  


They are video-calling right now. Jisung, Felix and him. The boyfriends are together at Jisung's apartment. Clothes already decided. Changbin feels a headache coming.

  
  


"Okay. Anything else?"

  
  


_"Nope, just add that long pendant. And leave your curls as is."_

  
  


He will look very disheveled. Very shaggy. But Felix is saying that will look good. And he is the only one Changbin can trust in terms of styling.

  
  


"Hmm. I'll go wear them then. See you in 30 minutes."

  
  


_"Bye!"_

  
  


He puts the phone down. Tired. He should eat something if wants to survive till the night.

  
  


Some leftovers would do. Galbitang from yesterday's dinner. His mom's favorite.

  
  


He is slurping through half of his soup when he gets it.

  
  


A message.

  
  


Soo: hi changbin

  
  


Fuck. He had never expected a message from Yeonsoo. They have not contacted each other in a year. 

  
  


And did he really not change the name?

  
  


He is supposed to hate her. She made him look like a stupid. So paranoid.

  
  


Then why did he pick up the phone to answer her.

  
  


Deep down, he knows he will never be able to hate Yeonsoo. They have shared beautiful memories, time and childhood. It's difficult to brand someone if you have a soft spot for them. Even if they have been nothing but cruel to you.

  
  


Me: hi yeonsoo. long time. how are you?

  
  


Soo: im good good. how are you?

  
  


Me: good too. whats up?

  
  


Soo: oh nothing

Soo: it had been a while

Soo: just wanted to check on you

  
  


She wants to check on him. Ah.

  
  


Me: thanks

Me: just preparing for a friends showcase

Me: going with sung and lix

  
  


Soo: oh wow, that sounds fun

  
  


It's anything but fun.

  
  


Me: yes it is

  
  


Soo: cool

Soo: also changbin

Soo: want to catchup someday?

  
  


What?

  
  


Soo: i mean only if you want

Soo: we can meet at jesters

  
  


Me: you hate that cafe

  
  


Soo: but you love it

  
  


What is going on? Yeonsoo wants to meet him?

  
  


Me: okay

Me: tell me when

  
  


Soo: is saturday okay?

Soo: noon-ish

  
  


He will be at home. It should be okay.

  
  


Me: sure

Me: see you

  
  


\-----------

  
  


The final showcase is nothing like the rehearsals.

  
  


For one, they are on the performance side not the green room. All the preparations are going on behind the heavy red curtains.

  
  


Second, the presenters and the models have their hair and make up done based on the collections they'll be wearing. They were mostly barefaced in trials.

  
  


Third, he, and everyone else in the auditorium, are dressed up. From flashing, expensive items to dressy like he is wearing.

  
  


It's not Changbin's first time attending a fashion show. He has been to one with his mom. But this might be his first for the University.

  
  


He is sitting in the bottom row just above the podium with Felix and Jisung. Hyunjin sure got them the best of the seats. 

  
  


Jisung is wearing black on black and it suits him well. Especially the multiple earrings he has on right ear. Very unlike Jisung's regular attire, but fancy nonetheless.

  
  


Felix, on the hand, looks like a fairy. Bright orange oversized blouse tucked into loose pants and his hair done perfectly into waves. So pretty.

  
  


They are not the only ones of Hyunjin's invitees attending the show.

  
  


Jeongin is sitting right next to Changbin, followed by Minho and Chan.

  
  


Chan. It has been a while since he last met him. They had exchanged quick pleasantries just before the show. He was visiting home for the mini vacations. 

  
  


Minho had been as welcoming as ever despite the man's intimidating aura. They were running late so there wasn't any scope for doing more than a few conversations.

  
  


Seungmin is nowhere.

  
  


He might be backstage with Hyunjin. It fucking hurts.

  
  


The show had started with an MC introducing the jury. The dean, a couple influential figures from the Busan parliament, one TV actress. This is a bigger deal than what Changbin had thought.

  
  


Then couple collections. Womenswear. Strong geometric figures attracted to the shoulders - 'The law of physics'. Jungle themed with prints and fake attachments.

  
  


Models walking in different formations. Loud applause at the end of every collection.

  
  


Then Kim Hyuil's menswear collection. Drumrolls, models marching to the center of the stage. Military trims.

  
  


A few more.

  
  


The show is very interesting. The collections do reflect the hard work and passion of the creators. It's honestly impressive.

  
  


Felix thinks the same. He is shouting and clapping and passing his positive energy to the participants. And Changbin can't help but join him.

  
  


Jeongin is relatively quiet on his side. Mostly on his phone. 

  
  


Chan and Minho have big smiles on their faces. Supportive. Or maybe things are better between them now. 

  
  


They really look good together.

  
  


They have that energy that balances each other out. And Chan's very mature for his age. No wonder Minho is attracted to him.

  
  


"And next we have, 'Russian Roulette' by Hwang Hyunjin! Please give him a big hand!"

  
  


Finally.

  
  


The first beat starts playing. Mysterious. Changbin is almost at the edge of his seat. This sounds so good.

  
  


He has had the chance to look at Hyunjin's collection before. He remembers the trims, the gems, the heavy fabric. 

  
  


But they look ethereal when put together. 

  
  


It's bright and shiny and so Hyunjin.

  
  


Everyone is clapping hard and Changbin feels so proud. 

  
  


Every collection is given 4-5 minutes so Hyunjin's comes to an end very soon.

  
  


He is happy to have been here amongst the crowds cheering his friend up. Changbin has no chance with Hyunjin but either way, he is Changbin's friend and it's enough.

  
  


Russian Roulette is followed by 10 more collections. All amazing and unique in their own ways.

  
  


Somewhere around the last of the collections, Hyunjin joins them in the seating area. He is bright red and so happy. He is practically glowing. 

  
  


Hyunjin's aura is so bright, Changbin almost misses Seungmin who is just behind him.

  
  


So he was backstage.

  
  


Hyunjin passes by all their friends, shaking hands and bright smiles. He is warm. 

  
  


Last stage.

  
  


It's a mixed collection. Mens and womenswear. 'Polaris'. Celestial stuff with 3D approach and dark palette. Very impressive.

  
  


The MC takes over the stage. And then jury members. They give their view on the showcase. Good words. The students deserve it.

  
  


"Thanks for being a part of The Spectrum. While we won't be awarding top collections, the credits will be added to their final grades. Congratulations to the participants! You all did a fantastic job!"

  
  


Loud claps.

  
  


And with that the red curtain falls dramatically. Marking the end of the show.

  
  


Audiences disburse one by one. There are multiple exit points so things are not crowded or overwhelming anymore.

  
  


They all meet in the lobby. The eight of them. Happy smiles.

  
  


"Congratulations, Jinnie!"

  
  


It's Minho.

  
  


Hyunjin immediately goes to hug him. And then everyone. It's really sweet to see their exchange.

  
  


Chan hands him a bouquet. Carnations. 

  
  


Oh, he should have gotten something too. Changbin is really dumb in this area.

  
  


Then Hyunjin comes to him. 

  
  


Vanilla and sandalwood. So fresh. So beautiful.

  
  


"It was great, even if you had spoiled me with the type haha."

  
  


"It's okay, thank you for coming."

  
  


Felix takes over. Introducing his boyfriend to his friend. They both are animated talkers. Cute. He knows Jisung will like Hyunjin too.

  
  


"Guys, guys, guys. Let's go to _Solaire._ My treat!"

  
  


_Solaire_ is a high-end restaurant a few minutes outside of the campus. Not fine-dining but close enough. With bigger tables and stuff out of norms for regular campus outings.

  
  


They take their own cars. Jisung, Felix and him taking Jisung's hatchback. Minho and Chan in a Hyundai, most probably Minho's. And Seungmin, Hyunjin and Jeongin riding together in the redhead's latest Kia Seltos. Bright red, just like his dyed hair.

  
  


It takes them more than 15 minutes to reach there. Unapologetic traffic.

  
  


The restaurant is on the fourteenth floor of a commercial building. Glass exteriors. Changbin is thankful he dressed up today.

  
  


They are ushered to a huge table on the side of the restaurant. Two couches, empty chairs. It will fit the eight of them.

  
  


The interior is very oriental despite it being a French restaurant. Dark paneled walls, cut outs, slow music.

  
  


They take their seats - Minho, Hyunjin, Chan and Jeongin taking the bigger couch, while Jisung and Felix taking the smaller one. 

  
  


He takes the solo chair dragging himself near Jisung's seating area. Seungmin does the same, but for Jeongin.

  
  


Changbin can see Jeongin eyeing him from the corner. But the guy doesn't speak much. He is safe, for now.

  
  


But the tension is not just between Seungmin and him. They all are talking in batches. Some visibly ignore the others.

  
  


The atmosphere is as dense as Seoul's population.

  
  


Felix is narrating his day to Jisung. It's adorable. And cheesy. But Changbin's attention is not on them. Not entirely. 

  
  


He can see Chan is really uncomfortable. Shifting in his seat. Looking up and outside.

  
  


It's weird.

  
  


Then he realizes Chan is sandwiched between Hyunjin and Jeongin. Minho is at the end of the sofa, discussing menu items with Hyunjin. 

  
  


But aren't they all friends?

  
  


Why would he be awkward around his friends? Unless they have had a fall out or something. Which doesn't seem to be the case though.

  
  


What's wrong with him?

  
  


He doesn't get to think much. Minho shushes everyone for a call out.

  
  


Right. He is the oldest.

  
  


"Alright guys, we are ordering now. Onion soup, Veal stew, casserole, scallops, crepe and souffle. Anything else you guys might wanna eat?"

  
  


"Get me some beer please?"

  
  


"No, Jeongin. It's not good for you."

  
  


"I'm barely any younger than most of you. Cut me some slack. And I'll go back home anyway."

  
  


"Let's get drunk, all of us!"

  
  


Hyunjin is immediately up on the idea. He deserves a good day though. Changbin would give him anything if he wants it.

  
  


"Hyunjin."

  
  


"Channie, please. I need stuff, this whole month has been shit."

  
  


Okay, Chan should step back. Let the guy do whatever he wants. 

  
  


Thankfully, Minho agrees.

  
  


"Channie, it's okay. We'll not drink more than needed though. And those who are driving, please step back."

  
  


This meant Jisung, Minho and Seungmin. Wow, the way he forgets about the redhead's existence all the time. He is insignificant anyway.

  
  


The courses begin one by one. Food is surprisingly delicious. And as authentic it can get. Hard to find in the entirety of South Korea, honestly. Most often they just do adaptation. Which is okay. Real French cuisine will be too bland on their Asian palate.

  
  


And Budweiser. He honestly missed it. Changbin hates having alcohol alone and Jisung is a teetotaler. The last he had a proper can of anything above 0.1% alcohol was just after his breakup last year.

  
  


He would have preferred soju. But he is not nursing a heartbreak. 

  
  


Well technically.

  
  


Changbin needs to have self control. People are not worth the effort or his time. Look at what happened with his past relationships.

  
  


Falling for any pretty face is just not done.

  
  


Especially if that pretty face is involved with someone else.

  
  


It's just three cans. Why is his mind conjuring scenarios?

  
  


The deal with Hyunjin and..that guy is their own. If they like to sleep around, it's their business. Or if they are friends with benefits, that's on them too. Being friends with Hyunjin will not change the fact.

  
  


Good. Friendzone yourself before the other person does it for you.

  
  


Okay, it's spinning now. His head is heavy. 

  
  


Because why is Chan looking longingly at Minho? 

  
  


Or why is Felix eyeing Jeongin this hard?

  
  


Hyunjin is happily eating his meal. So is Jisung.

  
  


Seungmin is doing whatever playboys do.

  
  


But the overall tension on this table is so thick he wants to puke.

  
  


Wait, that's not the reason.

  
  


Changbin hears alarm bells going off in his head. The onset. 

  
  


He rushes to the bathroom. Opens a stall and gets his dinner out.

  
  


Well, fuck.

  
  


\-----------

  
  


They say don't drink much especially if you are doing it after a long time.

  
  


They are right.

  
  


Changbin looks okay. _Feels_ okay now.

  
  


Water splashes really do wonders. His hair is kind of wet for the free water droplets. But it's okay. He is wearing his natural curls anyway.

  
  


He grabs some tissues to wipe his face out. He is stalling time, he knows that. But it's better than to just get out with a heavy mind and stomach.

  
  


The table did not notice. Changbin is happy if that's the case. He needs no pampering. No one aside from Jisung and Felix knows him well anyway.

  
  


Wrong.

  
  


There's a rustle and the bathroom door opens. It's Chan. Honestly the last person he had expected.

  
  


Chan looks worried. Out of place. More than he had been on the table earlier.

  
  


Maybe he did not come for him. Changbin is hoping that is the case. His low tolerance to alcohol is highly embarrassing.

  
  


"Hey, you are here. I thought you went out for a call or something."

  
  


Thank God.

  
  


Also, Chan is addressing him directly? It's been a while since he had properly interacted with the guy. He is mostly distant these days.

  
  


"Yeah, I had a call. Just came here to wash my face. Had too much I guess haha."

  
  


"Umm..it was good. I don't blame you."

  
  


Chan moves to the basin. Just washing his hands. No attempts to make use of the open doors. He is here to stall time too.

  
  


He is not drunk. At least not visibly. Chan's speech is clear too. 

  
  


Then why is he speaking to Changbin willingly?

  
  


Changbin takes a seat on the solo couch in the dry area. Pretending to wipe his face. He is waiting for his stomach to settle down.

  
  


Chan is by the front wall now. Hands dry from the hot dryer. He is using his phone. A focused look on his phone.

  
  


"Chan."

  
  


He looks up.

  
  


"Hmm?"

  
  


"Chan, are you okay?"

  
  


He visibly stiffens. He is not okay.

  
  


"Sorry….I'm just…. there's a lot on my head."

  
  


"Hey, hey. You don't have to tell me. I just..I noticed you have been distant so wanted to check on you. Sorry for not messaging you earlier."

  
  


"No. Ah. I could have messaged you too haha. We kinda meet everyday in class. I'm too caught up in my head, I guess."

  
  


"It's okay. We all have those days. I was a mess last year so I think I get what you mean."

  
  


Why is he telling Chan? Shit, is he still drunk?

  
  


"Oh? I never noticed."

  
  


"I would hope that wasn't noticeable haha. It's just...very embarrassing."

  
  


"Haha, I would have hope mine wasn't noticeable either. But I guess I'm not a good actor haha."

  
  


The 'hahas' are so dry Changbin wants to floor himself. Chan and Changbin are really similar. They are both very awkward with people. Even like-minded ones.

  
  


"Well, I had a breakup. A bad one at that."

  
  


"I wish mine was a breakup."

  
  


Oh? So Chan and Minho are having troubles in their relationship? And it's worse than a breakup? Toxic relationship?

  
  


No wonder he had been sitting with Hyunjin on the table. And the longing look? It explains everything.

  
  


Changbin holds himself from asking more about it. Because if he does that, he will have to tell about his past too. Like a fair exchange.

  
  


"I hope things get better for you, Chan."

  
  


"Me too haha. By the way, let's do our studies together? Like we used to do?"

  
  


Changbin honestly missed that. Missed Chan's brains and patience. And he needs Chan Miracle in his life now. Fourth semester is cruel, they say.

  
  


"I would love to! Message me anytime you wanna do it. I'm coming back to dorm on Tuesday next week."

  
  


"Perfect. I'll be back this Sunday. Have some work. We can do it in the library. Or in my apartment, if you are okay with it."

  
  


Right. Another reason to floor himself.

  
  


Chan lives next door. With his boyfriend. And Jeongin. And the redhead.

  
  


And Hyunjin.

  
  


Perfect way to hurt yourself, Changbin.

  
  


"Cool. By the way, you can speak to me anytime, yeah? I am on the same floor as yours hahaha."

  
  


Changbin needs to sober up. He is spilling more than he is should be.

  
  


"Thank you haha. I'll go back now. Minho must have been waiting for me."

  
  


"I will just take another call and be back soon. They must have called for the desserts."

  
  


"They did. I'll save some for you. Seungmin is planning to eat everything by his own."

  
  


Why is Chan friends with Seungmin? That man doesn't even speak. But neither do Jeongin or Chan himself. Fellow introverts. 

  
  


Just Jeongin gives out this dark aura, as if he is not an introvert. Just choosy.

  
  


And Seungmin is not chatty, but way too nonchalant for his liking. Even being friends with him would suck all his energy. He would want to avoid that on all costs, thank you very much.

  
  


Lastly, Chan. The only one he can mildly relate to. Mildly tolerate. And he did show Changbin his human side today. That he is not the perfect A student with a secure life as he had initially thought. 

  
  


Good for him. 

  
  


No, not good for him. Especially if that's affecting his love life. Changbin has had his fair share of relationship issues and he knows how devastating and affecting it can be on one's social and personal life. Chan deserves better than that.

  
  


Everyone deserves better than that.

  
  


Including himself.

  
  


The table is on their last course when he goes back. Jisung has a silent question on his face. Felix mirroring it.

  
  


_Are you okay?_

  
  


He nods.

  
  


_Yes, I am._

  
  


Changbin is not lying. He is feeling better now. As good as he can be in the middle of a crowd he hardly knows about.

  
  


Hyunjin has changed his place now. Sitting with Seungmin on the other couch. Or is that a seat even? He is practically on the redhead's lap. 

  
  


Chan and Minho are together, sharing a plate of soufflé. And a dessert spoon. 

  
  


Jisung is not a dessert person. Has never been one. He is off to the side, holding a strong conversation with Minho. Something about the difference in the state of art today versus that in the 18th century. 

  
  


Felix goes back to his phone, a plate of coconut ice cream untouched in front of him. 

  
  


There's another plate of ice cream on his side. Chocolate. Ah, he is not a fan of chocolate but will still eat it. This is a party, a treat.

  
  


There's someone missing.

  
  


Jeongin.

  
  


"It's so much fun aaa. Let's do this often."

  
  


Hyunjin's chirpy. He did drink his heart out then. Seungmin is holding him tightly.

  
  


Can they hold off their public display now? Changbin doesn't want to see them getting chummy with each other. Right in front of his ice cream.

  
  


"Yes! It's like two sets of friends coming together! We can do a picnic or something! Or maybe adventure park!"

  
  


Felix joins in. Just as excited as his friend is. Expected.

  
  


"Babe, slow down. But it was really nice meeting you guys, I'm sure we all will get along."

  
  


Ever polite Jisung.

  
  


"We will, that's for sure. I wish you were in the same university though."

  
  


Minho is playing with Chan's free hands. A habit of sorts. It's cute.

  
  


"I was kind of wary after hearing about Changbin's _interesting_ neighbors. But it's great haha."

  
  


Kim Jisung. He is going to lose his head. Soon.

  
  


"Ooh. What all did you hear?"

  
  


Now, this gets the redhead's attention. Of. Fucking. Course.

  
  


"Just some stuff about noises. Nothing major."

  
  


Felix is giggling on Jisung's side. Great, he was right. The cheesy couple are devil incarnates.

  
  


Changbin tries not to murder his best friend with his glare. That guy has to live. He is the only person Changbin can rely on. And now even he is on the edge. 

  
  


He needs to see a shaman. He attracts all the evils in the world. 

  
  


Hyunjin is laughing. A decibel or two higher than what this restaurant would allow them too. Changbin doesn't want them to land up in prison for creating ruckus in a luxury area. His reputation is mostly clean till now.

  
  


Barring the time he almost tanked his last boyfriend. Legit tanked. With 80 litres of water. 

  
  


He was enraged, please. How dare that piece of ass use him to check his sexuality? 

  
  


He knows what that person was - asshole-sexual. Wait, that sounds wrong. He liked ass; but he was 'straight', just experimenting. His exact words.

  
  


Changbin could not be someone's 'experimental' bunny so he dumped him. Ah, good old days. When he could show his anger as and when needed. 

  
  


21 year old Changbin is a chicken. 

  
  


A coward.

  
  


"What did he even hear? Haha me shouting at Hyunjin to clean the mess he calls his room? Or Jeongin's screech when Seungmin gets a little too close to him?"

  
  


Minho is not taking it seriously, thank goodness. 

  
  


Only if Jisung doesn't spill more.

  
  


Kim Jisung. You have one chance to redeem yourself.

  
  


As on cue, his best friend looks straight at him. And goes silent.

  
  


"Just that and moving furniture haha. It's my fault. I should have realized you guys won't be bumping that often due to different schedules. I kinda assumed you already knew you guys will be sharing a floor. Especially you, Chan. And Hyunjin."

  
  


Felix. Why would you do that?

  
  


Ah, his headache has no end.

  
  


"It's practically my fault? Like I was so busy I hardly paid attention to who I was sharing floors with. I wasn't bothered. Don't worry. Haha."

  
  


Changbin had to pipe in before more details were shared.

  
  


"Oh really? Is that why you passed on that paper? What was it again? Yeah - Please keep quiet - or something. I can't remember properly. I was mostly focused on the 'sincerely' part. It was so fake, my god."

  
  


The table bursts into laughter.

  
  


At his expense.

  
  


Changbin needs not one but 6 graves. They won't live to see another day. Time to buy bigger shovels. Jeongin is not here so he will be spared.

  
  


"Shut up, Seungmin. It wasn't like that, Changbin. Min is just exaggerating. Oh my, we have been such lousy and problematic neighbors."

  
  


Minho is trying too hard to conceal his laughter. But the tears in his eyes say otherwise.

  
  


"No, no. Someone had complained about us being loud as fuck. Was that you? Minho had me tape my mouth for the entire day. I was sad."

  
  


"Jinnie, you really are really loud. That wasn't just for the complaint. I wanted to make sure Chan could study for his papers."

  
  


"Why would I disturb Channie on purpose, Min? Stop acting so possessive."

  
  


Oh?

  
  


"Guys, stop. Please stop. Let's not create a scene here."

  
  


"Of course, you will side with Minho here. Won't you?"

  
  


"Jinnie. Calm down. It's not like that. Let's speak later?"

  
  


If Changbin thought the tension was thick before, it's even thicker now. Like rubber skin.

  
  


It feels as if he is watching some soap opera. Ones his mom watches in free time. Those heavy makeup and 10837 episodes one.

  
  


Hyunjin flops on Seungmin's shoulder and the redhead holds him tighter.

  
  


On the other side, Minho is wiping bits of cream off Chan's mouth.

  
  


Jisung and Felix have dropped themselves on their phones. This ain't their business anyway.

  
  


Changbin can not wait to go back home.

  
  


He did not subscribe to a romantic thriller drama.

  
  


Jeongin joins them as Changbin finishes off his ice cream. It's water now. Basically.

  
  


"Sorry, I had this really long call. Seung, we need to get back home. Mum needs some stuff."

  
  


The tension goes off, replaced by urgency. Now they are not being held up by anything. Or anyone.

  
  


"Alright, yes. Guys, I'll have to head off now. Jinnie, will you be fine going with Minho?"

  
  


"I will take a cab."

  
  


"Don't be a child, Hyunjin. We won't speak a word, if that bothers you."

  
  


"No, you bother me. A lot. I will not go with you. Baby, can you call me a cab? Please?"

  
  


Seungmin lets out a sigh. Tired. 

  
  


Deserved.

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


Hyunjin's cab takes 10 minutes to arrive at their location.

  
  


10 whole minutes of awkward silence.

  
  


Hyunjin had already paid the tab. Even after Chan insisted to pay half of the amount. He really is a headstrong person.

  
  


They take the lift separately. Changbin is stuck in a box with Minho, Seungmin and Jeongin. While the other four take the next one.

  
  


Seungmin and Jeongin leave first. Followed by Hyunjin who had been reluctant to go now, hugging Chan so tight Changbin wonders if the guy can breathe. He is 100% drunk. Explains his behavior earlier. Felix and Minho are helping him get inside the cab.

  
  


Jisung and him are on the side. Taking in the situation. They are not directly involved, or as close Felix is, with the housemates. It did not feel correct to poke their nose into something that did not concern them.

  
  


Hyunjin finally gives in and leaves.

  
  


"I'm sorry you had to see that. He is generally not like...this. Maybe he drank too much."

  
  


Minho is apologetic. He need not be. They are all college students. Getting shitfaced is like the second nature to them.

  
  


"It's totally okay. We just worry if he is okay."

  
  


"He will be. I'll check on him tomorrow morning. Thanks again for turning up. And congratulating Jin. It made him really happy. I think we'll have to take our leave too. Min, let's go?"

  
  


"Yeah, thank you so much. And sorry we were shitty neighbors to you, Changbin."

  
  


"Oh, don't worry. Bye. Tell Hyunjin we had a fantastic time."

  
  


"Bye guys!"

  
  


Felix joins him in bidding them farewell.

  
  


They get into Minho's Hyundai and leave the area.

  
  


"Wow, that was a ride. Binnie, I'll drop you home. Or do you wanna stay at my place?"

  
  


"And watch you two fucking? Thank you very much."

  
  


"Haha, you have seen everything anyway. What's there to get shy about."

  
  


"Please. Please don't remind me. I couldn't get rid of Felix's ass off my mind for days."

  
  


Changbin needs bleach to clean his memory.

  
  


"Aw, so you _do_ find my ass sexy. I knew that!"

  
  


"Lix, no. Stop tempting the poor guy."

  
  


Jisung is not possessive. _Why_ isn't he possessive? Not even an ounce? No wonder Felix goes around calling people whatever he wants. This level of trust is crazy. Changbin could never.

  
  


"Haha, so funny. Please drop me home. I have had enough drama to last a lifetime."

  
  


"Sure, Binnie boy."

  
  


"Shut up, Kim Jisung."

  
  


\--------------

  
  


Past.

  
  


Your past is one of the most significant things in your life.

  
  


It gives you memories to smile over even after years.

  
  


Or memories that give you tears.

  
  


Things that you learn from.

  
  


Changes you bring in yourself.

  
  


Past is as beautiful as it is haunting.

  
  


And preparing to face your past is not easy. Especially for someone like Changbin who has a hard time moving on from things, events. People.

  
  


From Yeonsoo.

  
  


No, it's not romantic. Their breakup wasn't very sudden. It was a mix of events. And distance. 

  
  


It made sense that way. Changbin wasn't the one for long distance relationship either. 

  
  


But he would have tried that for Yeonsoo. He would have made as many compromises needed for Yeonsoo.

  
  


It was that toxic. He was that blind.

  
  


And Yeonsoo might have gotten bored of his obsessive attachment to her. Makes sense. 

  
  


Maybe Sehoon is treating her better.

  
  


He hopes her new boyfriend is treating Yeonsoo better.

  
  


She deserves it.

  
  


Everyone deserves clean love.

  
  


He takes his time dressing up. To look good. This might not be a date. But he has to do it for himself. 

  
  


To give a message.

  
  


He has moved on from the breakup.

  
  


From Yeonsoo.

  
  


He wears pink because he likes that color. It looks good on him. It makes him happy. He hardly gets to wear these soft shades. Not out of choice, but out of inconvenience. Campus laundry might destroy his favorite pieces. He would never take a risk.

  
  


Changbin styles his hair carefully. Untangling curls. Tight waves. He is going to pop up a light pink beret anyway. His black slacks have gone tighter. Lack of exercise. But it's a good fit overall.

  
  


He snaps a full length picture using his bedroom mirror.

  
  


He knows he looks good, but there's someone else who can validate it better.

  
  


**Furries**

Me: [Attachment]

Me: guys how do i look

  
  


Felix: 💋💋💋

Felix: hot af

Felix: i approve uwu

  
  


Jisung: You look good bin

Jisung: Where are you going though?

  
  


Me: aah, yeonsoo wants to meet

  
  


Jisung: Why?

  
  


Me: just to catch up ig

  
  


Felix: are you okay bub?

  
  


Me: yes yes no worries

Me: ive moved on lol

  
  


Felix: i can see that🙄

  
  


Jisung: Let the guy live lix

Jisung: Good luck

Jisung: Take care

  
  


Felix: call me if you need someone to throw a bitchpunch

  
  


Me: lol okay lixie 

Me: thanks guys

  
  


_Jesters_ is familiar. It's his childhood and teenage years and now youth. He is familiar with every table, every nook and corner. No matter how many times they renovate it, make changes, the essence will remain the same for Changbin. 

  
  


He remembers all those evenings he spent here. Alone. With a thick shake. A rich kid with overwhelming parents. Fights. His sister leaving for the states. Troubles with his first boyfriend. Second girlfriend. All those birthday parties. 

  
  


_Jesters_ is his second home.

  
  


He walks in. Everything is the same. His last visit had been this month. Of course nothing has changed.

  
  


A quick bow to the staff. Changbin knows most of them. Many of them have changed.

  
  


His favorite table. A wooden high bench with two comfortable solo couches. A geometric block of light shining on the center of the table. 

  
  


Yeonsoo is already sitting. She knows his favorite place. Favorite place. Him.

  
  


She looks very pretty. Her long hair is nape-length now. A beret. Like him. They are soulmates indeed.

  
  


Her styling has changed though.

  
  


Comfortable yet so her. Fitted blouse, high-waisted pants. They dress like this in Seoul maybe.

  
  


"Hey."

  
  


"Hi. How are you?"

  
  


"Haha. Come sit down. You don't need to be so formal with me."

  
  


Changbin did not notice how stiff he had been. Nerves. It's just Yeonsoo. Someone he has known since forever. No matter how distant they are now, they were once attached to the hip. As friends. As partners.

  
  


"Yeah, sorry. I mean, I didn't expect us to meet. Like after all that."

  
  


"I know, and I'm sorry Changbin. I should have cleared stuff out with you."

  
  


"No it's okay, what happened. Already happened. You tell me. When did you come here?"

  
  


"Last Sunday. Semester breaks were for two weeks this time. So I took one for Summer training."

  
  


"Ah, still an overachiever, I see."

  
  


"Still pretty, I see. Oh sorry, it just came out."

  
  


"Haha, compliments won't hurt me Yeonsoo. Go ahead. Flatter me."

  
  


"Wow, so cocky. By the way, how are your parents? Jisung? His boyfriend? Sorry I forgot the name."

  
  


She seems genuinely apologetic.

  
  


"It's Felix. And don't let him hear that. He will rip your head without mercy. He seems chirpy and happy, but can be scary when needed."

  
  


"I can imagine. He kept glaring at me on our double date."

  
  


They both laugh. The air is lighter now.

  
  


"How are your studies going, Bin?"

  
  


Tragic.

  
  


"Good. Got passable score last sem. Will have to work harder for this one."

  
  


"Aah. Microbiology is tough. Sorry you took that one up for me and I just….left."

  
  


Changbin's stupidity is not Yeonsoo's fault.

  
  


"No, no. I genuinely wanted it. I'm taking photography on the side."

  
  


"Really? Wow, that's fantastic news. I have always loved your photography skills."

  
  


She has. Half of her reel had been Changbin's shots. Nature, animals, objects. Her. She genuinely loved them.

  
  


"Thanks haha. Maybe I can try to be a wildlife photographer. Will fit both my majors."

  
  


"Oh, you will do well. Wherever you go. I have full confidence in you."

  
  


This is…. honestly Changbin has no words. Yeonsoo is still his silly friend. The one who kept on cheering him up. Making him happy. 

  
  


Maybe they should have continued being friends.

  
  


Maybe that kiss was not what they turned it to be.

  
  


Maybe they shouldn't have rushed into a relationship.

  
  


Changbin had a great support-system in Yeonsoo. And he really misses that.

  
  


"Thank you. Really."

  
  


"Again? Stop being so formal. Now tell me Mac n Cheese and what?"

  
  


"Fresh watermelon juice."

  
  


"Basic bitch."

  
  


"Shut up."

  
  


They talk some more as their orders arrive. They talk about SNU, her classes, his classes, Yujin, Yeonsoo's friends. 

  
  


Everyone but Yeonsoo's current boyfriend.

  
  


She avoided bringing him up and Changbin is not the one to push.

  
  


It's their time anyway.

  
  


"I really missed this. Like hanging out with you. It's comfortable."

  
  


It is. Apart from the initial awkwardness, their conversation flowed like Han river. Smooth and happy.

  
  


"I did too. We can do this more. Like when you are in Busan."

  
  


"You know what, come home!"

  
  


"Won't your mom…"

  
  


"Ah, she knows we broke up. But before that we were friends. We are still friends. Right?"

  
  


"Of course."

  
  


They will be. If she wants. 

  
  


Changbin really likes to live on the edge.

  
  


They hug goodbyes and he feels as if he can breathe again.

  
  


It's refreshing, in a freedom kind of way. Freedom from bad thoughts. 

  
  


Freedom from his inner demon who kept on painting Yeonsoo as the villain of his story. 

  
  


She isn't a villain. 

  
  


No one is black, no one is white. They all have their own limitations, strengths, weaknesses.

  
  


\--------------

  
  


Changbin really brings things to himself.

  
  


No seriously.

  
  


He thinks something, the universe proves him wrong the very next day.

  
  


No wonder he has trust issues.

  
  


He had been dreading coming back to the dorm anyway. No motivation. The semester ahead will be rough as fuck. His thing with his neighbors ended on a dramatic note the last time they were together.

  
  


And today he got exposed by the University blind post.

  
  


Well, not entirely.

  
  


But the hints are stronger than ever. Almost impossible to know unless you know Changbin personally. Or Yeonsoo.

  
  


Pukyong Confessions @pkconfessions

Remember Lee Sehoon's case from last month? Turns out there's more to it. His SNU girlfriend 'A' and our fellow university-mate 'C' were caught dating near 'C's' home in Yeongdo. 

  
  


@yul_hee: leave them tf alone whats your problem

@tiffanyyoung12: i was okay with earlier stuff but this is stalking

@mijoonim: blocking and reporting💅

  
  


Changbin is happy with the support he is getting even though people don't know who 'A' and 'C' are.

  
  


By this logic, Sehoon would have been getting the most stamps of 'poor guy' and stuff. His name and love life is out in the open for everyone to talk about. Changbin is at least hiding behind an alphabet.

  
  


He feels bad for the guy.

  
  


Changbin had plans to go to the library to study. Now he just wants to dig a hole and stay inside. Without outside interactions.

  
  


Hopefully Chan will not ask him any questions if he refuses to go to the library.

  
  


Me: hey chan

Me: i dont think ill be able to join you in the library today

Me: dont feel too well

Me: tomorrow?

  
  


He puts the phone on the side, dropping headfirst on the unmade bed. His life is a flop romanctic piece that is rated 20% and below on Rotten Tomatoes. 

  
  


There's a vibration.

  
  


Oh, wow. Chan has replied quickly.

  
  


Only this isn't Chan.

  
  


Jeongin: I tried holding this off, but the other admins will get suspicious if I try too hard. Just think what we talked about. It would benefit you. 

  
  


The timing.

  
  


Amazing.

  
  


He knows Jeongin is right. A new gossip will put the cheating stuff on the backburner. But isn't Seungmin cheating too?

  
  


Me: let me clear this thing. is your brother okay with it? i have seen him kissing multiple people. is he already with someone? won't this create more gossip?

  
  


Jeongin: Yes. No. I don't think so

  
  


Me: you dont think so? 

Me: sorry how will i trust you if you yourself are not sure?

  
  


Jeongin: I mean I'll make sure it's not a gossip item. His partners have all been understanding so far. But in case something arises, I'll use my brother-card to get the information on the page. Your case was different.

  
  


Me: last thing. how long will this work for?

Me: ill be honest, your brother and i dont like each other

Me: the shorter the engagement is the better

  
  


Jeongin: I understand. Give it 3 months for now. Hopefully we'll be able to distract the audiences by then.

  
  


Me: 3 months 

Me: okay ah

Me: let me check w your brother too

  
  


Jeongin: Go ahead. Connect with me if needed. 

  
  


Me: sure

  
  


Great. Now he will have to tolerate the devil for 3 months.

  
  


Please be a safe ride. Changbin is fed up of bumps in his way. 

  
  


\--------------

  
  


"No one apart from Jeongin and us will know about this. We have to act natural okay? If anyone probes just say we have an enemy to lovers plot. We kept bumping, hated each other's guts, then got soft or something and now we are trying to date. To make this a success, we will have to show minute gestures at first. Got it?"

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


"So we will meet every day. Dinner, lunch, whatever, just be available. We can hold hands, that's okay. But no mushy stuff, please. That's my limit. The idea is to be public, in your face public, but not by doing things that would be uncomfortable for me. Or for you. Do you understand?"

  
  


"Yes."

  
  


"Okay, I have no issues with you kissing or whatever. Just don't do it on campus. Go out, go to Seoul for what I care. But I don't want to be called a side bitch. Do you understand?"

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


"And please. If you still have people to go out with or this thing is not for you, we'll drop it. But after 3 months. I just need my name cleared."

  
  


"Got it."

  
  


"Good. Now, any questions?"

  
  


"Yes. Is kissing in your rulebook, dear sir?"

  
  


Changbin had expected this question. After all, most of their run-ins had been with the redhead kissing one person or the other.

  
  


And he has decided to put his head and ego on stake for legit strangers. And his degree.

  
  


"It is okay. Do whatever, I don't care."

  
  


"Cool. Can we start now? I need to check if your lips are worth it. I haven't been with the same person for more than 3 days. And if I have to be with you for longer, your lips better be made out of cherries."

  
  


What the fuck. 

  
  


This is the longest Seungmin has ever said in one go. At least to him.

  
  


"Wait, wait, wait. Before that, what's your deal with Hyunjin?"

  
  


"Jin? He is my friend?"

  
  


The redhead has a very curious look on his face. As if he is checking what stuff Changbin can come up with.

  
  


"You mean a friend you have been fucking?"

  
  


A moment passes. Seungmin shifts from his position on Changbin's sofa. They are meeting in the afternoon. None of the wild housemates are around. Seungmin was tasked to make sure they won't be, for a while at least.

  
  


And then he is laughing. Legit laughing. Like throwing his head back and shaking his body. That type of laughing.

  
  


Changbin can't comprehend this reaction. Is sleeping with your friends that normal? If he sleeps with Felix and Jisung, will that be a normal thing?

  
  


"You really….you really come up with the weirdest things. Like last time I was cheating on someone and now I'm sleeping with my own friend?"

  
  


Okay, so it is not normal.

  
  


"Well, in my defense, I saw you with multiple people. Kissing. And then in Hyunjin's drawers, there were........see I'm trying to be civil with you. If you do this, it's difficult for me."

  
  


Seungmin is trying to hold his laughter now. Some sort of breathing exercises.

  
  


Changbin is embarrassed. Like red in the face embarrassed. 

  
  


He has no rights to judge people based on their looks or whatever status they have. Maybe Seungmin isn't the jock from his high school or from movies and dramas.

  
  


But then he kisses people with no restraints. He has admitted to not sticking one person, one relationship. He is the jock™, even if a jock with morals.

  
  


"What did you see, Changbin?"

  
  


"Huh?"

  
  


"In Hyunjin's drawers. What did you see?"

  
  


Uh.

  
  


"Just some...stuff."

  
  


"You mean sex toys?"

  
  


"What? No no. Okay, I saw condoms and lubes and a whole of other stuff. Not toys. I'm sure yours will have it though."

  
  


Seungmin starts laughing again. Unrestrained.

  
  


"My, you saw stuff you will find in any healthy boy's drawers and you assumed we were fucking? You think so low of me, Seo Changbin. I don't fuck anyone with legs. I keep them out of my circle. And I don't even share rooms with Hyunjin, for your information. Just sometimes. And I kiss people because I enjoy kissing. And it's always the other person coming to me."

  
  


Great. Now where is the Mariana Trench? He needs to jump right into it and disintegrate. 

  
  


"Uh."

  
  


"What else did you assume about me? I'm really interested to know."

  
  


He has a lot of things in mind. But he will not be embarrassing himself further, thank you very much.

  
  


"Shut up. So you are on our deal, correct?"

  
  


Seungmin scoots closer to him. What is he doing?

  
  


"Yup, now time for the free trial."

  
  


Oh.

  
  


He goes stiff. Not his first kiss. Not even with strangers. Younger Changbin was wild. At least after school. He has played alcohol pingpong, kissed strangers on dares, basically most of the stuff. He is not proud of who he was.

  
  


But kissing drunk and kissing completely sober are two different things.

  
  


At least Kim Seungmin is a looker.

  
  


And buff.

  
  


Not like that matters. He has always liked dominating his partners in kisses and on bed. But switching is okay. Just not his first preference.

  
  


The way the redhead is approaching him, teasing eyes and smirk intact, is like a wild tiger approaching his prey. Like he knows the other will give in. 

  
  


And he is correct. Sadly.

  
  


Just 3 fucking months.

  
  


Changbin shifts in his seat, turning on his side, feet up. If they will be kissing, he would rather not risk a sore neck.

  
  


"Cute."

  
  


Okay, he knows he is cute. Anything else?

  
  


Seungmin touches his neck. Cold hands. Changbin can't help but wiggle and close his eyes. This is his favorite posture. Turn-on point.

  
  


His lips are softer than expected. Seungmin pecks him once. Twice. And then uses his teeth to nip at Changbin's bottom lip.

  
  


The room is getting hotter by the second.

  
  


Changbin can feel the redhead's smirk even with close eyes. He is talented with his lips. And teeth.

  
  


Seungmin nips some more, demanding entry to his mouth. Changbin's reflexes have him holding to Seungmin's hair. They are slightly coarse. The amount of times he would have to dye his hair to maintain the red is definitely going make his hair dry as fuck.

  
  


And then Changbin goes blank. The feels heighten. His brain is hyper focusing on one thing. Kim Seungmin and his amazing lips.

  
  


They kiss for minutes. Or maybe hours. That's not kissing. They are fully making out. Their positions have changed, they must have kept changing them as they focused on each other. Makes sense. 

  
  


Changbin just wants to melt.

  
  


No wonder people attach to this guy as a leech. He is a skilled kisser for sure.

  
  


Changbin is not one of the leeches. He is doing Seungmin a favor by letting him kiss. And Seungmin is helping him too.

  
  


They are balanced. As balanced as fake boyfriends can be.

  
  


Fuck. Kim Seungmin is his boyfriend now.

  
  


Fake but still.

  
  


Seungmin is scrolling channels on his TV. This workout session did nothing for him. While Changbin feels as if his lungs have been replaced with fire.

  
  


It will take him some time to get used to their aggressive kissing.

  
  


Just 3 months.

  
  


Maybe this will replace his non-existent exercise routine. It's a win-win for Changbin for sure.

  
  


"I need a moment….Ugh."

  
  


"Haha, you'll get used to it."

  
  


"Bitch."

  
  


"Wow, you sure have a dirty mouth on you. Now talk about being surprising."

  
  


"I only have a dirty mouth when it's you. Don't be so full of yourself."

  
  


Changbin rolls his eyes. Cocky bitch.

  
  


"I'm happy to have that place, your honor."

  
  


Seungmin is so nonchalant about things it's absurd. Like they are old friends chatting about their day over a cup of coffee.

  
  


He needs his caffeine dose.

  
  


Right now.

  
  


"Uh..Kim. Can we conclude on all the terms? I have places to be."

  
  


"Okay. Date?"

  
  


"Yeah sure. I am not you."

  
  


"I meant our date? We can do from today, right?"

  
  


He will have to endure an extra soul on his coffee date. Perfect.

  
  


"Uh, sure?"

  
  


"It's you who wanted us to be public, Changbin. Why are you so unsure?"

  
  


"Right. Okay then. My car."

  
  


"Let's go."

  
  


Wait. He can't go out like this. Changbin is still in his sweats.

  
  


"Sit here. 5 minutes. I need to be presentable."

  
  


Seungmin shrugs but listens to him either way.

  
  


"I don't mind. But you do you."

  
  


Of course, you don't mind. You can wear anything and make it look like the one for a runway. Curse of pretty people. 

  
  


"Haha, you find me pretty?"

  
  


Shit. Wow. Changbin is high. For sure. 

  
  


"Shut up."

  
  


He runs to the bedroom to hide his embarrassed face. The things he brings to himself. It's a torture indeed.

  
  


10 minutes. 20 minutes.

  
  


Changbin is purposely stalling his time in the bathroom. He wants to stay here, pretend the last two years did not happen. But he has to be exposed to the real world soon.

  
  


A fish in the sky.

  
  


That's what he is feeling like. 

  
  


Maybe he needs an anchor. Maybe fishes can fly after all. Maybe he can face his fear this once. Maybe Jeongin's deal will help.

  
  


Maybe it's a great starting point.

  
  


\----------

  
  


The date goes okay.

  
  


_Han's_ isn't exactly like _Jesters'_ or _Solaire_ so that's that. But it is on campus.

  
  


Their entire deal is to be as public as possible.

  
  


Subtle. But in your face at the same time.

  
  


They are purposely drawing attention to themselves. Not hugging or touching. Just the proximity and the shear absurdity in their lifestyles should turn heads.

  
  


No one bats an eye.

  
  


Tragic.

  
  


His Americano tastes bitter even after adding more sugar than he would generally. A man of habit. Fixed taste. _Han's_ sucks.

  
  


Did Changbin really kill his palate for nothing?

  
  


In front of him Seungmin seems normal. Unaffected. He has nothing to lose anyway.

  
  


The redhead - actually orangehead, the red dye has washed out by a lot - is not here to drink coffee or have cakes. Sports person diet. He just came along to be here. To put a seal on their public relationship.

  
  


That's actually sweet of him. Unless he did that just to get on Changbin's nerves. 

  
  


Possible.

  
  


The guy is on his phone. A range of emotions going on his face. Smile, smirk, annoyance, amusement, bored. Mostly bored. He is more animated when not in motion. 

  
  


Wait. Why is Changbin analyzing Seungmin's face?

  
  


"Check my Insta. And download pics if needed. They will last longer."

  
  


Changbin is caught. Oh my God.

  
  


"I was not looking at you."

  
  


He needs to hold his ground. 

  
  


"Oh yeah? By the way, we are on a date. You are allowed to look at me."

  
  


"Fake date."

  
  


It slips before he can even think about it. Changbin quickly looks to his left and right. There aren't a lot of people in the hearing range. Good. He needs to be super careful. Put all his retorts for their time alone.

  
  


Seungmin has put his phone on the side. Both elbows on the table. Flower Boy pose. He looks ridiculous.

  
  


"Here you go."

  
  


Cheesy as fuck. No wonder he has all the bees around him, swarming him all the time.

  
  


"This trick won't work on me."

  
  


"At least show you are interested in me. Like 50%."

  
  


"10%."

  
  


"30%."

  
  


"20%. Final. No less no more."

  
  


"Okay. Cool. What will I get in my 20% barter?"

  
  


This conversation is ridiculous. But okay, let's entertain the guy while he finishes off with his Americano.

  
  


"Stares."

  
  


"Loving stares. I don't think boyfriends glare at each other."

  
  


"They do. When you annoy them."

  
  


"Wow, you do have experience with annoying partners then."

  
  


No one was remotely closer than Seungmin on the annoyance scale. But he need not tell this aloud. They are not really dating anyway.

  
  


"Yes, I think I can handle you well."

  
  


"Who says I'm annoying? I'm super sweet. See."

  
  


Seungmin blinks his eyes. It doesn't suit his physique and aura. At all. He looks like a bodybuilder acting cute.

  
  


It's so fake.

  
  


"Seungmin. No. And we need to think of something to create a buzz. No one really cares here aah."

  
  


"Because it's not full yet. Bad timing."

  
  


"It's good though. We couldn't just come with a bang. Subtle is good. It makes sense."

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


Changbin finishes his Americano and drags Seungmin outside. Sun is still out. Summer weather. 

  
  


They take shelter under a big tree. Changbin is in two minds. All his first year, he avoided every person, kept everyone at a distance. And now he is itching for at least someone to look at them. Someone to notice.

  
  


"Now what?"

  
  


"You say. I'm here to follow you."

  
  


"Stop being so cheesy ah."

  
  


Seungmin just laughs. What's so funny?

  
  


"Well, you need not worry about lack of attention. There's someone who did notice. Look."

  
  


Seungmin points to his back.

  
  


Someone did?

  
  


Who?

  
  


Fuck.

  
  


"Binnie! Seungmin! Hi!"

  
  


The Universe hates Changbin. 100%. Without a doubt.

  
  


It had to be Lee Felix. Of all the people.

  
  


Technically, hiding things from Felix is difficult. Two reasons. First, he goes to the same University as him. Second, the guy knows every single person in the University. Social butterfly Lee.

  
  


And he really can't keep his mouth shut either.

  
  


Jisung is going to play 20 questions with him. Very soon.

  
  


He just hopes Felix sees this as a friendly meeting amongst acquaintances. Yep, fitting. 

  
  


"Oh wow, you two together. I thought you had beef or something."

  
  


Was it that obvious?

  
  


"No, no. We are just……"

  
  


Seungmin looks straight at him. Checking for his reaction. Silent approval.

  
  


"....we are just hanging out. We don't have beef. Just our interests are different. But we are okay, right Changbin?"

  
  


"Absolutely!"

  
  


Too exciting. Tone it down.

  
  


"I mean, yeah. We are just grabbing some coffee here."

  
  


Changbin gestures to the cafe. Which is suddenly very crowded. Now, there are eyes on them. People are paying attention.

  
  


This is so awkward.

  
  


Felix is smiling devilishly. Like he can read Changbin's brain. Maybe he can.

  
  


"Oh sweet! I would love it if our groups can connect! By the way, I gotta leave. Date. See ya!"

  
  


Thank goodness.

  
  


And he just storms off. A spirit.

  
  


What just happened?

  
  


"No one will believe us. We are doomed. I'll be exposed to the world. Then I will change the University, and my name and fly off to Japan or something. This is never gonna work out. Ah, I can't act for shit. Its so -"

  
  


A touch. Light. Changbin opens his eyes. 

  
  


Seungmin is holding his hand. Lightly. As if testing waters.

  
  


"Breathe. 1,2,3…."

  
  


Changbin follows the voice. Calming down.

  
  


"You okay?"

  
  


"Hmm."

  
  


He is. That touch is calming indeed.

  
  


"You don't have to do out of the norms. Let's be natural? Like only if you want to stay in this deal. I'm okay if you aren't, by the way."

  
  


"I don't want to think about it today."

  
  


"Take your time."

  
  


"Thanks."

  
  


"I'm by the fields. Message me if you need me?"

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


Then Seungmin runs off. Leaving Changbin with his own thoughts.

  
  


Did he really want to do this?

  
  


Can he handle the pressure and all those lies?

  
  


Maybe.

  
  


For now, he just wants to sleep.

  
  


\------------

  
  


Jisung: You are dating?

  
  


Exactly what Changbin feared. And it's not even 2 hours after the cafe fiasco. 

  
  


Dispatch should hire Felix. He for sure moves really fast.

  
  


Changbin had been minding his business. Really.

  
  


Youtube shows. How to make cheese toast in the microwave. Some MCountdown videos. 

  
  


His original plan of sleeping did not go through. At all. 

  
  


And now this message.

  
  


Now, he could tell Jisung about the deal. But his best friend can't seal his mouth. He doesn't want to be subjected to another questioning text. Especially from Felix.

  
  


He would definitely want to live another day.

  
  


And Felix is kind of friends with Seungmin. Or friend-in-law, with his crossed connections to Hyunjin.

  
  


Blame Twitter for his Gen-Z mind. But he finds the term interesting. And technically they are friends. In law.

  
  


He could pretend to know nothing. Maybe?

  
  


This could work. Yes.

  
  


For now, he shouldn't respond. Delay the inevitable. Pretend he was sleeping or something. Not far from the truth.

  
  


Three more videos on Cheese Nation. Five close call compilations on National Geographic. 40 minutes of buffering.

  
  


"You watch enough of these cops, and you begin to get a feel for why the female chooses one male and not another. It's my guess that this guy isn't going to do well. I mean, that's pathetic,"

  
  


Even birds don't have it easy. Humans are social animals. Great.

  
  


What's so amazing about attraction?

  
  


Sure a lot of people can be subjectively beautiful. Felix is. Subjectively. Changbin might be allergic to love now, but he has eyes.

  
  


Hyunjin is.

  
  


Like really really pretty. Changbin should get him to model for his photography assignment.

  
  


Hyunjin's soft yet glowing features will suit his style of photography so much.

  
  


Purple sky, setting sun, fields and Hyunjin in a white shirt. Angel on earth indeed. 

  
  


Seungmin is pretty too. Like in a different sort of way? More like handsome? Strong jaw, sharp eyes, strong cheekbones. But he is not a conventional beauty.

  
  


Or Changbin's type.

  
  


Why is he thinking about Seungmin of all people?

  
  


Think about Hyunjin's smile. His laugh. 

  
  


The boy is suffering so much. His roommates think he is obnoxious and loud. 

  
  


Minho isn't any better, if you ask Changbin. Sure, you can be protective over your boyfriend. But bros over hoes is a thing right? 

  
  


He had even dropped Yeonsoo in a nail parlour when Jisung needed him. The fact that he went back sprinting is a different thing altogether.

  
  


But the way they all ganged up on poor Hyunjin was wrong.

  
  


He had wanted to hug the guy.

  
  


Oh well, it's a family matter. He should not involve himself into the mess. No really. Changbin has had enough parachuting himself into troubles. And his bad luck sees no end anyway.

  
  


Should he ask his mom to book a meeting with shaman?

  
  


This is ridiculous.

  
  


No pings.

  
  


It's a relief. 

  
  


Jisung is not the one to force anyone. Changbin is lucky to have at least one person with braincells in his life. 

  
  


Ring.

  
  


Spoke too soon.

  
  


Jisung: You don't have to tell me

Jisung: I was just asking

  
  


He should not run anymore.

  
  


Damn.

  
  


Me: no no

Me: we are just taking our time ig

  
  


No use covering up anything anyway. The more his best friend believes his shit. The better it will be.

  
  


The way he is trying to fool a genius.

  
  


Maybe Seungmin and him can make it look believable?

  
  


But Changbin has been visibly disgusted over relationships. Wait no. It's all in his head. Jisung knows some but it can work?

  
  


Jisung: Oh nice

Jisung: Anyone I know?

  
  


Oh you do. Kinda?

  
  


Me: its seungmin ksksj

  
  


Jisung: Makes sense

  
  


Wait. 

  
  


How does it make sense? Is Jisung okay? Changbin did not even interact with Seungmin in front of the guys.

  
  
  


Jisung: I mean I saw some tension between you two that day

Jisung: Some kinda sexual tension, if you know what I mean

  
  
  


Kim. Fucking. Jisung.

  
  


The way you are jumping into conclusions.

  
  


There was no sexual tension. At all.

  
  


It's all Felix's fault. He has corrupted his best friend.

  
  


Me: wdym sexual tension? 

Me: there was none haha

  
  


Jisung: 🙄

  
  


Me: really we are not there yet

Me: just sorting our feelings ig

Me: i was planning to tell you

Me: but felix is ahead of me

  
  


Changbin is going to hell for his blatant lies. But he can save his face. And potentially a degree. Useless degree but a degree nonetheless.

  
  


Jisung: It's okay 😂

Jisung: It's been a while since ive seen you this flustered 

Jisung: I'm your friend not a parent. I'll support you all the time

Jisung: Tell me when you need me to break his bones

  
  


Me: youll find someone for me?

Me: awwww 

  
  


Jisung: No, I'll send Felix. Who has his own circle of protection squad. I'm sure they include some goons too

Jisung: 😂

  
  


So, Jisung is aware of Felix's connections. His power. Good for him. 

  
  


Well, a guy with straight As - who is already booked for his internship - can not be as blind in love as Changbin had been before. 

  
  


Changbin won't be blind anymore.

  
  


He will tape his eyes, if needed.

  
  


Dating Kim Seungmin, professionally, should be enough of a repellant for his anti. He hopes so. 

  
  


Me: lol you always send him across

Me: dont let him see your messages

Me: i dont wanna cause a breakup

  
  


Jisung: hi!!

  
  


Oh no. Of course. 

  
  


Me: hi lix

Me: i was just joking haha

  
  


Jisung: i know hehe

Jisung: btw you and seung look hot together

  
  


Huh?

  
  


Jisung: your height diff is cute uwu

  
  


He is not that short! The redhead is taller than normal. Of course. Kim Seungmin is a basketball player.

  
  


He needs to pretend to be shy or something. Just to make this dating phase look realistic.

  
  


God, with Yeonsoo, Changbin would have blushed to Mars. They had a cute height difference too. Yeonsoo is really pocket-sized. Still is.

  
  


Oh.

  
  


He really needs to get over Yeonsoo. Thoughts of her. Not everything needs to be compared with her. Okay, they are back to being friends. Kind of? But this is toxic.

  
  


Love really sucks.

  
  


Changbin should abstain and go to the Himalayas or something. No distractions at all. 

  
  


Me: thanks ig

Me: we are not official btw

  
  


Jisung: its okay hahaha

Jisung: take your time bb

Jisung: WAIT

Jisung: lets do a double date!!!!!!!!

Jisung: or a trip aaaaaaaaaa

Jisung: jiji agrees too uwu 🥺🥺🥺

  
  


What the fuck?

  
  


Me: ill have to ask seungmin tho

Me: haha

Me: we are trying to take it slow yk with all that stuff going on

  
  


Jisung: Don't mind Felix

Jisung: He is just very excited for you

Jisung: I am happy to see you happy too, Bin

  
  


It's bittersweet. Changbin is fooling them all. But he still has the support-system. 

  
  


He hopes all this drama is worth it at the end.

  
  


3 months.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


Library is super quiet at this hour.

  
  


It's half past 11 at night. Only a failing student like Changbin and overachievers like Chan would bother to camp in the deserted hallways of this ancient library.

  
  


It could be haunted too.

  
  


Changbin is sure he heard some faint screeches a while ago. 

  
  


Or it's just his mind projecting things. To distract from the piles and piles of assignments he is due with.

  
  


His grades are horror-show worthy indeed. And those screeches could be equivalent to his dad's high pitch yells. Cinematic parallels.

  
  


And well, Changbin's life is like a shitty, low-budget horror movie with jump scares. A lot of jump scares. Total cringe. And unexpected.

  
  


He is that protagonist who tries to check the cursed attic while the viewers facepalm. 

  
  


Parachuting into troubles indeed.

  
  


"You need to revise this part….and this."

  
  


Chan points at the sections. The highlighter in hand, the neon cap placed neatly on the side.

  
  


He is so organized it hurts.

  
  


Chan's notes are super neat. White spaces. Color coded markdowns. He even bothers to underline important stuff with a ruler. Who does that these days?

  
  


And most importantly, he is okay sharing those with Changbin. Bless him.

  
  


"Okay…….. Also, your study on microbes. How is it going?"

  
  


Chan adjusts his glasses. Little uncomfortable. Or it is the stuffy air, maybe.

  
  


His phone is buzzing on the side. It has been doing that since 15 minutes. Chan did not bother to check or mute them.

  
  


It is important then. Or Chan just wants to stall it.

  
  


As Changbin, the king of stalling everything.

  
  


"Ah, I only have a few pages left. Will proofread once and then send it through. Probably by next week."

  
  


"Oh, that's amazing! I'm sure you'll get a good one!"

  
  


"Thanks haha."

  
  


The smile is genuine. They are friends. Changbin cares for this guy. Even if he is shit at expressing that.

  
  


"Your stuff…..umm..is it better now?"

  
  


"What stuff?"

  
  


Changbin just sits there. Maintaining the eye contact. He would not force Chan to share something he is not comfortable with. He just wants to make sure that his friend is okay.

  
  


The realization. It is clear on Chan's face.

  
  


"I wish. I mean, it got more complicated. I should have seen that coming."

  
  


Man, that sounds deep. No wonder Chan and him are friends. They both have shitty love lives.

  
  


"Oh."

  
  


Changbin had witnessed that. The drama at the _Solaire_. But Minho and Chan looked okay? Maybe their deal is deeper than it's shown on the surface.

  
  


The neighbors have stopped shouting now. There's no moaning too. 

  
  


Hyunjin…...he doesn't want to think about it anymore.

  
  


He stands nowhere in his scale anyway. Hyunjin might have boytoys hanging by his arms for all he knows.

  
  


Also, why is he believing Seungmin's shit? That guy could be lying. Changbin has caught him multiple times. Red-handed. 

  
  


Or maybe he really _really_ wants kisses and casual stuff? Seungmin mentioned about not dating. Maybe he is a cursed fellow like Changbin and despises relationships?

  
  


It's good then. Safe.

  
  


"Um...Changbin."

  
  


This breaks his stupid train of thoughts. He looks up. Chan is all packed up. When the fuck?

  
  


"Sorry...I got to go. Some urgent stuff."

  
  


Chan is apologetic. It's okay. He need not be. Changbin had noticed the urgency of his texts or calls or whatever.

  
  


"No, no. It's cool. See you then."

  
  


"Yep. Let's do this at my place next time? I have some dissection placed there. It would be easier for me."

  
  


"Perfect. Bye."

  
  


"Bye."

  
  


Chan runs off, leaving Changbin to his thoughts. And assignments. He should seriously get back to his work. There's still so much left.

  
  


1 AM. 3 AM. 5 AM.

  
  


He is super tired now. But at least his paper is done. Chan had helped a lot. Angel indeed.

  
  


It doesn't help that Changbin is only surviving on a stale sandwich and Doritos. He is hungry and tired. 

  
  


He will be skipping 8 AM for sure. To hell with Prof. Shin.

  
  


Ring.

  
  


Who can text him this early? Changbin is not coherent enough for drama please.

  
  


He checks his phone.

  
  


Serious question. Can pulling an all nighter damage your braincells? Or can they cause illusions?

  
  


If not. Then why the fuck is Kim Seungmin messaging him at 5 AM on a cursed day?

  
  


And it's not just his annoying self. He is being super sweet? What alternate universe is this?

  
  


Kim Seungmin: hey. chan says you have been working the whole night in the library? do you need food? drinks?

  
  


How the fuck is Kim Seungmin up at ass-o-clock in the morning?

  
  


And why does he care?

  
  


Okay, technically they are dating? But there won't be a single soul around to notice them? Make it make sense.

  
  


Kim Seungmin: tell me quick. i have practice in 10 minutes

  
  


Oh, that answers half of his question then. Kim Seungmin is a sportsperson. And sportspersons have super-strict training in the crack of dawn.

  
  


Cool.

  
  


He needs to leave his pride on top of Mount Everest. He is getting free food. Nothing is better than free food.

  
  


Me: thanks get me whatever

  
  


Kim Seungmin: alright. where are you sitting?

  
  


Ask his bums, please. They are hurting now from sitting in the same posture for hours.

  
  


Me: row three, second floor. near the windows

  
  


Kim Seungmin: up in 2 

  
  


Really? He had already got some food? Seungmin really thought Changbin would agree? Well, he is right. Some jocks do have brains.

  
  


Changbin should stop judging people. Really. It will do him no good. Plus, he has had enough troubles with people judging him too. So why do stuff he himself dislikes? That's so hypocritical of him.

  
  
  


Seungmin takes less than 2 minutes to reach him. Damn athletes. The now orangehead has legs for days. It is attractive. Conventionally.

  
  


He has a flimsy jacket over the University tank top and some basketball shorts. Freshly showered. Who showers before a practice session? When they know they'll be doing it after it anyway? Probably Kim Seungmin. 

  
  


Even his aftershave scent is strong and overwhelming to Changbin's sensitive nose.

  
  


"Hey, what's up?"

  
  


His I-just-woke-up grumble is hurting Changbin.

  
  


"What do you think is going on, mister intellectual?"

  
  


"You need sleep. Clearly. Here."

  
  


Changbin had not noticed a cloth bag in his hand. Damn, this guy uses eco-friendly stuff? So rare.

  
  


He takes the bag from the guy. Too hungry to think of morals. Or anything. 

  
  


It has real food. Not instant food. He had honestly expected chips or anything from the vending machine. Not two tiffin boxes. One with homemade egg rolls. Tiny ones

with pepper and bacon. And another box with freshly cut fruits.

  
  


"This is homemade…"

  
  


"Hmmm..Minho made it. For me."

  
  


What?

  
  


"Then why are you giving it to me?"

  
  


"Because you need it more than me. Simple. And I get to eat more home-cooked stuff than you anyway. I am not missing out on anything."

  
  


This is actually...sweet?

  
  


"Uh. Thank you. What will you eat then?"

  
  


Seungmin just shrugs.

  
  


"I have practice. I had banana milk in the morning. So it should be okay. If not, I can run back home and eat. Minho always makes extra for Chan and me."

  
  


Minho cares a lot. For Chan. For everyone. That's visible. 

  
  


"Uh okay."

  
  


"No issues. I gotta go."

  
  


Seungmin starts to jog and then comes back seconds later.

  
  


Changbin is getting the packed chopsticks out.

  
  


"Wait. I forgot."

  
  


He looks up.

  
  


"Come to the flat. At 3 PM sharp. No one's gonna be home."

  
  


Huh?

  
  


"Why?"

  
  


"I need help."

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


Changbin agrees. Returning his kind gesture. Kim Seungmin can be nice, if he wants. Or maybe he is reading it all wrong.

  
  


Well, at least the food is good.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


Hide and seek.

  
  


Changbin used to love this game when he was younger.

  
  


He played it in his past relationships. 

  
  


Now he is tired of it.

  
  


They are behaving like criminals. Visiting places when no one's around. Practically, this is to generate curiosity and believability factor of their fake relationship.

  
  


They can't just go - "Tada! We are dating. Believe in us uwu." That would be as fake as it sounds.

  
  


Jeongin had asked them to be as sneaky as possible at first. And then 'accidently' get exposed. And Changbin had agreed. This was the smarter way. His own relationship had gone down the same way. 

  
  


But it's been three days and they have generated zero interest amongst the Universitizens. 

  
  


Pukyong Confessions, do your job at least this once.

  
  


So far it was only Felix noticing them. And it had meant nothing. He is not someone who would shout around the campus about stuff going on with one of his friends. 

  
  


They need to step their game and be as 'publically' sneaky as possible. 

  
  


Seems like Seungmin had thought of that. Or maybe it's Jeongin's brain? He is honestly not sure.

  
  


Because the 'frat house' is not empty as he had been promised. Well, not technically. There was Jeongin opening the door for him. Smirking.

  
  


Seungmin was on the couch, sprawled. Track pants and an well-worn t-shirt.

  
  


And Minho near the seating area just at the entrance. Tying his shoes. He is heading out. Perfect. 

  
  


Changbin is glad it's Minho. Hyunjin would have been the perfect choice for the kiss-and-tell. But Minho would do too. He is not as loud as needed for this fiasco. But he will tell Chan, he hopes. And Chan will ask him, he hopes again. 

  
  


A tiny spark of interest. But interest indeed.

  
  


"Oh, hello! Innie, why didn't you tell me Changbin was coming home?"

  
  


"I don't know. Ask Seungmin."

  
  


"Ah, don't stand there. Come, sit. Min, get him something to drink!"

  
  


Seungmin is acting nonchalant about it. While Changbin is really nervous. What if they get caught? It doesn't even look like they know each other.

  
  


But that's what is subtlety. Right?

  
  


He grasps the can of coke offered to him with urgency. Act normal.

  
  


"I was actually going out. I guess you came for Seungmin?"

  
  


Minho is looking at him with teasing eyes. He thinks something is up. Plan successful. Maybe?

  
  


"Ah, yeah. I had something to discuss…..with him."

  
  


Minho doesn't believe him. At all. 

  
  


Changbin should be happy. Then why does he feel like flinging himself from the roof deck?

  
  


This is embarrassing as fuck.

  
  


"Cool the, have fun."

  
  


He feels as if he is surrounded by a pack of smiling hyenas. They all have a creepy smile on their faces. Minho, Seungmin, Jeongin.

  
  


Thankfully, Minho leaves them. Shutting the door with a grace like never before. Changbin can still hear the loud banging of the doors from before. Why are these guys being so cautious now?

  
  


Maybe because they promised to be civil floormates?

  
  


Or maybe because he is Seungmin's 'potential' love-interest?

  
  


This is crazy.

  
  


"My job here is done. Don't have too much fun."

  
  


Jeongin waves a quick goodbye and vanishes through the main door. 

  
  


"Well, that was eventful."

  
  


"Is it funny to you? My heart was in my mouth the whole time."

  
  


Seungmin says nothing. Just goes back to the T.V. There's a soccer match going on.

  
  


Changbin uses the time to calm down. He sips on the soda, checks his Twitter, Instagram, iMessages.

  
  


Nothing major. Nothing too controversial. There are messages from Yujin. Regular ones. Sharing quick stuff about her day. Like a diary. Changbin finds it very calming. 

  
  


At this point, he is living vicariously through Yujin.

  
  


"Oh, you are on Twitter? Add me?"

  
  


No fucking way.

  
  


His Twitter profile is his safe haven. In no way he is going to share it with Seungmin.

  
  


"Why?"

  
  


"I don't know. Just to be more vocal about our relationship? Like those couple things?"

  
  


"You for sure know a lot for someone who claims to have never dated. And that's Lovestagram. And it's for Insta not Twitter."

  
  


"See, I don't know."

  
  


"Yeah, yeah. Okay. But that's a good idea. Do you have something everyone knows? Like a brand or something? Or even stuff that can be used as couple items?"

  
  


"Naah. I have jerseys. Caps? If that counts?"

  
  


"A cap would do. Okay. Let's add each other to Insta first. My ID is seolar. S.E.O.L.A.R. underscore C.B. 99. Yep, that's me."

  
  


He gets closer to Seungmin to make sure he is typing it correctly. Damn, he really needs to update his DP. That was from ages ago. When he still had his braces on.

  
  


"Hmm. Done. Accept my request. Also, make your profile public."

  
  


"Right."

  
  


Changbin had made his Instagram private after his breakup with Yeonsoo. There was no need to do it. But he thought it would prevent her from checking how he is doing?

  
  


Moping. He had been moping. For an entire year. 

  
  


There were only a few pics from the missed year. Most of them from his 'dates' with Jisung and Felix.

  
  


It would have been hard to explain that no, he has not gone poly after the heartbreak. It's just his fucking friends.

  
  


He quickly changes his DP. A selca from a few weeks before. Boring but better than this one. And his profile is public now.

  
  


In contrast to his, Seungmin's Insta is very updated. Like a picture a day. 

  
  


**Seungmin Kim.**

  
  


How did he even catch hold of this user name? There would be thousands of other Seungmin Kims in South Korea.

  
  


Or does he have that profile since the inception of Instagram?

  
  


It's cool. Clean. And totally celebrity-ish.

  
  


Even his 'followers' to 'following' ratio is insane.

  
  


Seungmin Kim is only following 10 odd people and has 10.3K followers. How the fuck? Their University doesn't even have that many people. 

  
  


Changbin, in comparison, is following 89 and has 34 followers. Low profile, like how he is. 

  
  


It means whatever hints Seungmin drops will have more impact. Obviously.

  
  


"Uh, Seungmin. We got to have you posting something from my side. Because, you have more followers? I don't even have anyone from this Uni following me?"

  
  


"Okay. Tell me."

  
  


"Maybe take a selca or something right now? I could be in the background? Like not everything of me. Just a part of my shirt or something? This shirt works right?"

  
  


He is wearing a pale lavender Summer shirt. He hopes it looks good on him. 

  
  


Seungmin gives him a onceover. Just obliging to the request.

  
  


"Works."

  
  


"Cool."

  
  


Then Changbin bends a bit lower. Pretending to do something on his phone.

  
  


"Let me know if the angle is okay."

  
  


"Don't worry it's perfect."

  
  


One click. Two.

  
  


"Done."

  
  


"Cool."

  
  


"I'll get you one of my caps then."

  
  


Seungmin walks off to his room. Wait. This isn't his room. 

  
  


Wasn't his room on the right to the kitchen? Why is he going straight?

  
  


Maybe he has his wardrobe set in another room?

  
  


Or maybe he had someone else borrow it?

  
  


Changbin goes back to his phone.

  
  


Kim Seungmin, what the fuck?

  
  


**Seungmin Kim**

_Busan_

[Picture]

It's whatever

  
  


He had asked for a part of his shirt. Why did he post half of Changbin's face?

  
  


It's so obvious now. At least that they are hanging out.

  
  


Hopefully, no one remembers his face. 

  
  


Seungmin gets back into the living room. A navy blue baseball cap in hand.

  
  


He throws that at Changbin like a frisbee. Which he misses. Of course.

  
  


Seungmin just chuckles at his response.

  
  


"What the fuck Seungmin. I am visible in the photo? We discussed only hinting. Now your 10K followers will be behind my ass."

  
  


He is annoyed. For a reason. This is moving too fast.

  
  


"Ah, it would get us in notice faster though. And don't worry about the 'followers'. I will protect you."

  
  


Yeah sure, he will. Who does he think he is? A prince charming?

  
  


"No, thank you. The damage has been done. We have to own it."

  
  


"Sure."

  
  


"Is that all? This is why you called me here? To watch you lusting over soccer players?"

  
  


"You are funny."

  
  


How can someone be this casual? Seungmin feels like a rock sometimes. And no, it's not about the abs. He has no idea if the guy has muscles. Probably, he is a sportsperson. 

  
  


It's about emotions. Like genuine stuff. Seungmin is so laid back and emotionless it's kind of funny. Even his speech tone can be mapped with a ruler. No dips, no highs.

  
  


Like a rock.

  
  


"Actually no. I said I need your help. And I do."

  
  


"What is it?"

  
  


Please stop wasting his time. He got to go back to his room and sleep. That's 100% more important.

  
  


"I need your help in dyeing my hair."

  
  


Uh?

  
  


Honestly, Changbin's never had a dye-job phase in his life. He likes his hair alive, thank you very much. Plus, his natural curls make it difficult for him to carry a lot of hairstyles. 

  
  


Long story short, he has no idea how to work with a hair dye.

  
  


What if he accidentally fries Seungmin's hair?

  
  


"Uh. I don't think I'm the right person. Get someone else. I don't know how to use a hair dye, at all."

  
  


Seungmin just shrugs.

  
  


"I don't need an expert. I just need a hand. It's easy. You'll learn something new."

  
  


Yeah, like burning someone's hair off. But, oh well. If Seungmin wants to go bald, he can.

  
  


"Right. But let me get a spare shirt from my dorm. This is one of my favorites."

  
  


"You can wear mine. Big deal."

  
  


It is. It is a very big deal.

  
  


"No, thank you very much. It would be too big on me. Give me 2 minutes. I'll be right back."

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


It takes him no longer than a minute to spot the oldest shirt in his wardrobe. Star Wars. Black. Something he would never wear outside.

  
  


But it's safe. He bets red would be harder to get off. He would rather sacrifice an old t-shirt than his ego.

  
  


The 'frat house's' door is open as he had left it. 

  
  


Seungmin is no longer on the sofa, though. Maybe he is changing too?

  
  


"Come in."

  
  


The common washroom? He has no idea where it is?

  
  


Thankfully, Seungmin comes out from one of the doors by the kitchen. 

  
  


Their common washroom has dark tiles and a dark sink. Better for dyeing.

  
  


Seungmin takes out a set of reusable nylon fabrics. And two hairdresser type gowns. For their safety. Of course, he has everything ready. He must have been freshening up his color every few months.

  
  


"Wear this."

  
  


Changbin follows the guy and pops his robe on. It is very loose on him. But at least he won't get the stains on.

  
  


Believe it or not, he is still attached to this atrocious shirt.

  
  


Seungmin coughs to get his attention. How dramatic.

  
  


"I'll take the floor. You sit on that stool, yeah?"

  
  


There's a wooden stool in the corner. Seungmin is pointing straight to it.

  
  


Good lord, there's a comfy stool. He was worried he would have to sit on the edge of the bathtub or something. That would have hurt his ass so much.

  
  


He pulls away the stool and sits on it. Seungmin is near the sink, gathering his supplies. There are so many tubes, a couple brushes, a mixing bowl. An art indeed.

  
  


Now, he will never say this aloud but red does suit Seungmin. It's his brand or something. 

  
  


"Now, this is developer. And this the dye. We have to mix them in a proper ratio or it will dry out the hair."

  
  


Seungmin is crouching in front of him. One knee down. Explaining the process as he is a primary kid or something.

  
  


Well, technically, he is. In hairdye education.

  
  


"Okay….."

  
  


"I'm taking 40 and 40 so it's not strong. And then we mix it. Here you go."

  
  


The mixing bowl is placed in front of him.

  
  


"Now what?"

  
  


Seungmin chuckles.

  
  


"Nothing. I'll sit in front of you. Just start applying with the brush. From the nape. Roots first."

  
  


He settles down in front Changbin. Nudging his back to force him to open his legs. Seungmin only stops when he is comfortable with the position.

  
  


Inhale. Exhale. It's okay.

  
  


Changbin runs his hands through Seungmin's hair. It is not dry or coarse. Looks like Seungmin hasn't taken a hair wash in days. But it still looks nice? How does this guy make everything work?

  
  


"Feels good?"

  
  


He removes his hand as if he has been electrocuted. 

  
  


Time to get on the job.

  
  


The mixing bowl has a thick paste in it. Changbin takes it up and moves the brush experimentally. Oh, it's not as thick as he had thought before.

  
  


He uses his right hand to tip Seungmin's head down. There are tiny hairs working as a trail on his back. Some moles scattered across his visible neckline.

  
  


"Tell me if it's cold."

  
  


One stroke. Two strokes. He only gets hums in reply. It is okay then.

  
  
  


The roots go mushy with the liquid. Changbin is careful to not let the dye touch his bare skin. That would be a mess to clean for sure.

  
  


He is progressing well. Seungmin is humming a tune now. Unfamiliar. Something really soothing.

  
  


Changbin reaches to the top. Left hand holding the brush neatly. Thank God, he has decent art skills. He has even painted Felix's nails before. And that requires more precision than dyeing hair does.

  
  


It takes him an hour to finish every follicle. He is new to it. But Seungmin seems satisfied with his service.

  
  


They stay in the washroom for minutes after the full application. Comfortable. Relaxed.

  
  


Seungmin is surprisingly an okay person. Like an okay person to hang out with. 

  
  


"How much time to dry out?"

  
  


"10 minutes?"

  
  


"Hmm. After?"

  
  


"I'll just wash it off and apply conditioner."

  
  


"Mmkay."

  
  


Changbin is too lazy to get up now. He just wants to keep sitting there. Seungmin in his arms, his back against the bathtub.

  
  


And his left hand fucking hurts from all that work.

  
  


10 minutes pass just like that. He only knows about it through the annoying beep of Seungmin's timer. He is experienced in this dyejob thing.

  
  


"Okay, I'll use the sink to wash my hair. Wanna help?"

  
  


Ugh. His hands are bare right now. They might catch the dye.

  
  


"You have gloves?"

  
  


Seungmin laughs.

  
  


"Of course."

  
  


He then shuffles through the medicine cabinet. And makes a face.

  
  


"We only have plastic ones. Is it okay?"

  
  


Seungmin really is eco-friendly. Good for him.

  
  


"Yeah. Works. Anything that can keep my hands clean."

  
  


The plastic is puny on his skin. But does the job.

  
  


At least the faucet has a sprayer. Rare but they might have gotten it customized like the bigger part of their dorm. It's so not like his own.

  
  


Seungmin dips obediently and Changbin starts working on his scalp. The water flows down his plastic. Diluted red. He can't feel the scalp or the hair. But it's okay.

  
  


The sensation is pretty satisfying. 

  
  


Unexpected.

  
  


"Hand me that dark towel from the door?"

  
  


Seungmin requests. Fumbling. The angle is awkward. Changbin does as asked.

  
  


He takes off the gloves, giving it a last rinse while Seungmin towel dries his hair.

  
  


"All done."

  
  


"Yeah?"

  
  


Seungmin balls his towel and throws it to the laundry hamper by the door. It goes right in. An athlete indeed.

  
  


His freshly dyed hair is half dry and falling through his forehead. Like a sopping puppy.

  
  


Changbin can't help but chuckle.

  
  


"It's not done properly. Come here."

  
  


He takes a smaller towel. A dark one. Same brand as the body one. 

  
  


It's a struggle to reach him well. The guy is at least a foot taller. Okay, not that much. But still. 

  
  


Seungmin takes mercy on him. Bowing a bit. Changbin holds him by the neck just to keep him stable. The towel runs smoothly over his head. 

  
  


Crown. Nape.

  
  


He is now looking straight at Seungmin. They hold eye contact. 

  
  


The movement slows down.

  
  


Changbin drops the towel on the sink as Seungmin dives straight to his lips. The other hand goes to the nape.

  
  


Gasp.

  
  


It's crazy. It's addictive.

  
  


There's something forbidden about kissing in someone's place. More liberating.

  
  


He loves freedom.

  
  


His hands move past the nape to the arms. Muscles. 

  
  


Seungmin is impatient too. He is making little noises in Changbin's mouth. 

  
  


It's warm. Sweet. Sour. Bitter. All at the same time.

  
  


He gets flipped suddenly. Feral. The sink dips on his back. Legs open to have Seungmin in the middle. Ankles crossed.

  
  


Cloud 9. Nothing less.

  
  


Seungmin might be a rock but his kisses are soft as fuck. He could kiss him all day and night. That's how good he is.

  
  


Ring. Ring. Ring.

  
  


It's Seungmin's phone.

  
  


Basic ringtone. Rock Seungmin is back at it again.

  
  


He washes his hands and Changbin follows him. They have already agreed for kisses so there will be more coming anyway.

  
  


A quick hand on the laying towel.

  
  


Ring. Ring. Ring. Ring.

  
  


Impatient.

  
  


Seungmin picks his phone from the dry counter beside the hamper. 

  
  


_"Hello. Where the hell are you Seung? We have been waiting for you for 20 minutes now."_

  
  


Speaker phone. Seungmin's hair is not dried. it could harm his phone.

  
  


"I am busy. Sorry for not informing earlier."

  
  


Okay, rude.

  
  


_"Sorry? Seungmin this is not done."_

  
  


Seungmin looks at him. Straight in the eyes.

  
  


"This is more important. Anyway, see you later, Minhyuk."

  
  


And then he cuts the call. No explanation at all. 

  
  


"Wow, are you that rude with your friends?"

  
  


"They are not my friends."

  
  


"Okay, let me rephrase it. Are you that rude with people?"

  
  


"Am I rude with you, Changbin?"

  
  


No?

  
  


"Yes…."

  
  


Seungmin moves back to him. Circling his body with his gigantic arms.

  
  


"I don't know how this is me being rude. I'm made of cotton candy."

  
  


And then he blinks. For emphasis.

  
  


Changbin has to laugh. Please. Seungmin's face, body, and actions don't match at all. And cotton candy? A kid might barf at this brand.

  
  


"You are made of pure bullshit, Kim. Nothing more. Nothing less. Just because I'm okay kissing you doesn't mean I'll go soft with you. Learn to live on the edge. One wrong move and I'll cut you."

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


Then he drops a quick peck on Changbin's surprised lips. The audacity of this bitch.

  
  


"Kim. I will…..You...You…."

  
  


Changbin is okay. He is okay. He just wants to murder someone and get away with that. 

  
  


South Korean law is lax enough to let him go.

  
  


Look at all those chaebols living lavishly after committing heinous crimes.

  
  


Or these celebrities trending on Twitter for all the wrong reasons.

  
  


"Think about getting a taste, baby. You have the chance."

  
  


Changbin takes a deep breath. This guy is trying to test his patience.

  
  


"Your shitty pickup lines won't work on me, Kim. Go tell that to someone who would be easy enough to go with it."

  
  


"What will work on you then? And no. It's on the deal. I am a loyal person. Even when fake dating."

  
  


Right. Kim Seungmin is just riling him up. There is nothing into his blatant flirting. This is all fake.

  
  


"Okay. Okay. Got it."

  
  


"On that note. Let's meet out now. We have to have people see us to make assumptions."

  
  


Ugh. Yes.

  
  


"Yeah. Meet me at lunch. I take it with Felix at 1:30 PM. Hall 3. Usually near the display. We can sit together. Felix kinda knows we are trying out. 'Sorting our feelings' and such. I have told him, and Jisung, that we are not official yet. He was also pushing for a double date, by the way. If he asks you. Tell him that you can not. It will be an awkward thing."

  
  


"Hmm. Hall 3. Got you."

  
  


"Cool. Anything else? Or can I leave? My head hurts. I did not sleep well today. You know that."

  
  


"Go on. Rest."

  
  


Super awkward.

  
  


"Okay. Bye."

  
  


Then he runs for his life. One more minute and Seungmin would have devoured him full. That guy is like a wolf ready to pounce on anyone, anytime.

  
  


He is saved. For today.

  
  


\--------------

  
  


"Carrots are better, please."

  
  


"No, they are not? They were birthed by Satan themselves. What the fuck is this texture?"

  
  


"Binnie. Eat it today. I'll cook something for you tomorrow hehe."

  
  


"Please no. I want to live. What if this is your big plan to poison me?"

  
  


"Oh my! Why would I try to kill you? You are my friend."

  
  


"Yeah sure, Felix."

  
  


"Don't be so dramatic. I only burnt pancakes like _once_. You promised you'll take it to your grave."

  
  


"Technically, it's you who just spilled it out, baby. I might die today, if your scheme goes through."

  
  


"All this nonsense for carrots? You are like my little niece. She hates meat and makes up all the excuses in the world to not to eat them. You are a grown up, Sweetie."

  
  


"Nup. Not happening. I will just have bits of the fried rice. You take the carrots."

  
  


"Don't give your leftovers to me. Give it to your boyfriend. See, he is coming."

  
  


"Who the fuck?"

  
  


Oh.

  
  


Boyfriend.

  
  


His 'boyfriend' is indeed coming. It's funny how Changbin himself invited Seungmin to his table. Legit gave him directions and the coordinates of where he generally spends his lunch hour with Felix. And now he can't remember?

  
  


Why is that his brain only remembers shitty, unnecessary stuff?

  
  


Like the time Yujin and he fought in his 6th grade. It was over an extra pair of toothbrushes.

  
  


But ask Changbin what he had for breakfast and he will have to think _very_ hard. It's a curse. Really.

  
  


Holy shit.

  
  


His boyfriend.

  
  


Whom he kissed for hours yesterday.

  
  


Seungmin is indeed heading towards his table. Hyunjin by his side. The fresh dye a tad dark under all the false lighting in the hall.

  
  


He knows Seungmin will look like a vampire under the sun. That's how shiny it is. And it's not even styled.

  
  


Focus on Hyunjin.

  
  


Okay, Hyunjin. He looks amazing in his charcoal slacks and peach top. His blond hair is tied in a top knot.

  
  


That's it?

  
  


Changbin really has nothing to go wax poetic about him? What's happening?

  
  


The system is glitching.

  
  


Inhale.

  
  


Reboot.

  
  


On.

  
  


"Hey, Changbin. Felix."

  
  


No amount of breathing exercises, internal scoldings, fish therapy would have prepared him for this.

  
  


Nothing.

  
  


Mind. Blank.

  
  


He can hear cheers in the background. Felix's gasp. Hyunjin's 'Oh my God'. It's all blurry. Faded.

  
  


His only focus is Seungmin.

  
  


And his sinful lips.

  
  


It's not even a peck. 

  
  


Oh, God. He will cry. This is so good.

  
  


Changbin's initial shock subsides, giving way to immense pleasure. 

  
  


Wait.

  
  


They are in public.

  
  


He pushes Seungmin reluctantly.

  
  


They detach but Seungmin is still looking at him with bedroom eyes. His hand is still on Changbin's waist.

  
  


Bedroom eyes!

  
  


"Oh."

  
  


"Holy shit, that was hot."

  
  


Felix is standing. Like full on. Eyes wide. Almost comical.

  
  


"Felix! You also knew about them? And you guys are dating?? Since when?"

  
  


Hyunjin seems exasperated. Half disbelief. Half excitement.

  
  


"Please, guys. Let's sit down and discuss quietly."

  
  


Changbin can't help but pitch in. It's so embarrassing. 

  
  


Okay, their deal asked them to do _stuff_ in public. But it was never mentioned they could make out. Like this. In front of at least 50 fellow students and 10 other kitchen staff.

  
  


What if they get scolded for public indecency?

  
  


They settle down. He has to physically pull Felix down. 

  
  


Seungmin pulls the spare chair impossibly closer to him. What's with him today?

  
  


This is so damn cheesy and not in their initial plans. Oh, how will he explain this nonsense to others?

  
  


Yes, he had wanted a spark and people noticing them. But not like this, please.

  
  


He will be a campus gossip in no time.

  
  


Wait. 

  
  


That's actually very helpful?

  
  


And Seungmin's Insta? Perfect! 

  
  


This will bury the 'scandal'. Oh, good going, Kim Seungmin. You do have braincells.

  
  


"Now, tell me. When? How? What the hell. You were supposed to be my best friend, Min."

  
  


"I like Changbin."

  
  


What the fuck?

  
  


Seungmin has one of his hands on Changbin's thighs. Drawing random patterns.

  
  


Thank Goodness, he is not ticklish. He can't imagine what would have happened if he was.

  
  


Maybe a pterodactyl screech? Or him pushing the redhead to the floor.

  
  


And 'I like Changbin'?. This isn't a slow burn, dual PoV, unrequited love Twitter AU. Please.

  
  


Those might be an amazing read. But they don't apply in real life. No one is going to believe his lame answer. 

  
  


Damn.

  
  


Hyunjin just rolls his eyes. Of course, he got 'betrayed' by his best friend.

  
  


"Yeah, I can see that. You could give me a warning next time."

  
  


"Says you. I've seen worse, Hyunjinnie."

  
  


So, it's Hyunjin bringing his partners home. Ah, Changbin has no chance indeed. 

  
  


"Changbin, how did this happen? Like don't get me wrong. I'm really happy for you guys. But how?"

  
  


Hammer his heart, go on. Kill with a blunt knife.

  
  


"Uh. It's just. Like we kept on meeting and stuff happened. You know."

  
  


"You slept with each other?!!"

  
  


"No, no. Oh God. I mean that's personal. Felix, stop screeching. It's no big deal."

  
  


"This means you are official now! Yay!! Double date!!"

  
  


"Felix, how do you know? Why didn't you tell me?"

  
  


"I just caught them on one of their dates hehe. They were…..shining."

  
  


The table is a mess now. Hyunjin and Felix are loudly ranting about their respective best friends in front of their said best friends.

  
  


But Changbin's main concern is not them. He would handle this shit.

  
  


It's everyone else in the hall. He can feel eyes on his every movement. Seungmin's too. 

  
  


They are under public scrutiny now.

  
  


The redhead might be used to it. But Changbin likes being invisible. No name. No face. Nothing. Slipping under the radar every time.

  
  


"Hey."

  
  


"Hmm?"

  
  


"You okay?"

  
  


"Yeah…"

  
  


"Cool."

  
  


Seungmin now places his hand on Changbin's knee. Sure. Reassurance.

  
  


Everything will be okay.

  
  


2.5 months.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


Days blend into weeks.

  
  


Changbin is slowly getting comfortable with the whole fake dating thing.

  
  


Like they don't get a lot of time to do that anyway. 

  
  


He does what he used to do before and sometimes Seungmin joins him.

  
  


Not that they need to be attached at the hip to push the 'genuine' agenda.

  
  


Social media stuff is also few and far between. Only Changbin's followers count has jumped to 670. That's too much for his introverted ass.

  
  


They do some posts here and there. A couple selca. Photos at the same place, same food. Just the usual Lovestagram shtick. 

  
  


Celebrities do teach you a lot.

  
  


They meet often. Spend lunch hours together. Text a lot.

  
  


Seungmin's casual attitude has grown on him now. It balances him out. Kind of.

  
  


Best yet. There has been no new post about the Yeonsoo thing on Pukyong Confessions. It's dying down. 

  
  


Obviously, people are more interested to know how a loser like Changbin landed a sports jock Seungmin.

  
  


Hot topic indeed.

  
  


The nerd meets jock cliche.

  
  


There are multiple pictures of their dates posted on Anonymous folios. Blurred stuff. He could only clearly see Seungmin's flaming red hair. Taken from at least 10km away.

  
  


But so far none of the 'fans' have tried to invade their privacy.

  
  


That's where he draws the line.

  
  


It's more than their deal getting exposed. Changbin values his personal space more than anything else. 

  
  


Felix is over the moon by their relationship.

  
  


He is happy that Changbin is looking for himself and finally moving on. Oh, if only he knew.

  
  


Changbin tries to dodge his appeals for a double date. Once, twice. He gives up on the third time.

  
  


**Furries**

  
  


Me: at least tell me where we are going

  
  


Felix: nup

  
  


Me: i cant just drag seungmin anywhere lix

  
  


Felix: o.O 

Felix: worried about seungmin

Felix: i see i see

  
  


Me: shut up

  
  


Felix: im writing uwu

  
  


Me: then dont write

  
  


Felix: ok then you wont know where we are going uwu

  
  


Jisung: Lotte water park. Gimhae

  
  


Felix: i hate you!

  
  


Jisung: No, you dont

Jisung: Anyway, we'll be leaving at 8AM this Saturday

Jisung: You can get your car if you want 

  
  


Me: wow

Me: we are really travelling that far

  
  


Jisung: Lixie wanted that and I think it will be fun

Jisung: I will get the tickets

Jisung: My congratulations gift to you both

  
  


No, please. This is so…

  
  


But Changbin is excited for this outing. It has been a while since he went to a theme park.

  
  


Me: thanks

Me: ill let him know :)

  
  


Now, he has to convince Seungmin. It's Tuesday. Three more days to prepare his brain from exploding.

  
  


Should he text?

  
  


Should he call?

  
  


Fuck it.

  
  


Seungmin answers in two rings. It's late afternoon. He has no classes after 3PM, just like Changbin.

  
  


_"Hello."_

  
  


Oh, the heavy drag. He had been sleeping then.

  
  


"Oh, you can go back to sleep. I will call you later."

  
  


Some rustling. Sheets. Fabric. Grunts.

  
  


_"Um. Nah. It's okay. Tell me, what's up?"_

  
  


"Oof. Remember I told you about the double date thing?"

  
  


_"Felix?"_

  
  


Changbin sighs.

  
  


"Yeah. That one. Um.. Are you okay doing that?"

  
  


"Hm. Yeah."

  
  


Oh, this was easy?

  
  


"Really? We are going to Gimhae though. Water park. Is that fine?"

  
  


_"Mm. Sounds fun."_

  
  


"Saturday. We are starting at 8AM. Wanna bring your car?"

  
  


_"I'm okay with whatever you want."_

  
  


Smooth. 

  
  


"Um, okay then. You drive. I don't want to sit with Felix and Jisung and answer their 101 questions."

  
  


_"Cool."_

  
  


That's a relief. There wasn't a lot of praying needed. Seungmin is surprisingly cool with everything.

  
  


"Perfect then. Goodbye."

  
  


_"Wait, Changbin."_

  
  


Now what?

  
  


"Yeah?"

  
  


_"Come home."_

  
  


This request is not very uncommon. Seungmin often invites him home. Just to hangout. 

  
  


Or, well, to kiss.

  
  


Having other friends is not a problem too. They all know about them dating. And are more than happy with it.

  
  


Apparently, Changbin is perfect for Seungmin. He has to laugh. Bitch where?

  
  


"Right. 5 minutes. I'm making ramyun. Wanna have?"

  
  


_"Sure."_

  
  


Changbin adds more water to the pot. Seungmin likes it soupy. While he is okay with everything.

  
  


They are decent friends now. Kind of. 

  
  


Like they have a common friend circle. And Felix is always, always hanging out with Hyunjin.

  
  


And whether he admits it or not, Changbin loves Minho and Chan's cooking skills.

  
  


The couple always gets him something. Packed breakfast when he has to stay in the library till late. Late night snacks to munch on. He always has something home-cooked in his bag.

  
  


He is their friend-in-law indeed.

  
  


Minho is by the lobby when he gets out of his dorm. Dressed kinda fancy. Brown hair neatly combed to the side. Navy shirt and black slacks. Dress shoes.

  
  


Every single soul in the 'frat house' is a looker. Changbin has to admit this.

  
  


"Hey Minho."

  
  


"Oh, hi Changbin. Ramyun? Cool. Enjoy your date."

  
  


"Thanks. You too."

  
  


He only gets chuckles in response as Minho walks down the steps.

  
  


Flat 154 is left ajar.

  
  


There's a lot of movement going on inside.

  
  


He was right. Minho and Chan are off to a date, it seems.

  
  


Chan is dressed fancier than he has ever seen him. White shirt with rolled up sleeves, dark wash denims, and nice shoes. His curls are styled with some gel. They are shining.

  
  


He is by the door. Putting a watch. 

  
  


He looks at Changbin and smiles.

  
  


"Go to his room. He might be taking a shower."

  
  


"Thanks, oh also. Can we study tomorrow? I need some help."

  
  


"Of course, message me, yeah?"

  
  


"Yup, have fun."

  
  


Chan's smile is blinding. Something good did happen. He is happy. Ah, such a relief.

  
  


"I will haha. Now run, your ramyun will run cold."

  
  


"Oops."

  
  


Changbin rushes to Seungmin's room. Straight. The redhead shares it with Minho. Sometimes. Like it's officially Minho's shared room but he hardly stays there.

  
  


More like this flat believes in sleeping wherever they want. He once saw Jeongin sleeping on the sofa. Probably his fault. Seungmin and him were, ehm, busy. And his room was kinda adjacent to Seungmin's.

  
  


He has had Seungmin sleeping at his place more than once. Lounging, eating, kissing and then sleeping. 

  
  


Cuddling wasn't in the plan. But Changbin did not mind the extra warmth coming his way. 

  
  


It was comfortable, in a way. Welcomed.

  
  


He crosses paths with Hyunjin on the way. Looks like most of them were home today.

  
  


Hyunjin looks flawless as always. Changbin swears the man can pull off a rug if he wants to. This cloak-style shirt he is wearing would look so stupid on anyone else.

  
  


"Bye bye."

  
  


Hyunjin just waves at him before leaving. 

  
  


Seungmin is still not out. Changbin sits on his side of the bed waiting for him.

  
  


The room is practically spotless. He might look laidback, but the redhead is very neat with his stuff. He is eco-friendly, uses reusable items, tries to eat home-cooked stuff as much as possible. And his wardrobe is very organized.

  
  


Changbin can not relate, seriously.

  
  


He only has some days he is pumped enough to organize everything. Those days he would go feral over a centimeter of disturbance.

  
  


Rest of the days are lax as fuck. He could care less if his socks end up in the underwear drawer.

  
  


But Seungmin is not like that. 

  
  


That's why Changbin has a table mat placed under his ramyun pot. The water stains are hard to get out. He knows by experience.

  
  


Anyhow, where is this guy? The noodles are getting soggy now. He knows they both don't mind however the food goes. 

  
  


Except carrots. Changbin has a burning hatred for carrots.

  
  


Don't ask why. He himself doesn't know. It was way back in his childhood. Probably Yujin's doing.

  
  


Seungmin walks in as he finishes completing one round of candy crush.

  
  


He is only wearing track pants. Honestly, Changbin had expected a towel. Kim Seungmin hates clothes. He avoids wearing them when he can.

  
  


He has seen him shirtless more times than his family in the last 5 years.

  
  


"Come quickly."

  
  


"Chopsticks?"

  
  


"We can share one."

  
  


"Cool."

  
  


They just eat in silence. Seungmin is a neat eater too. This guy is so different from what he appears to be.

  
  


It doesn't take them long to finish off the pot. Just two packets. 

  
  


Seungmin takes the pot off to his kitchen. Keeping it out for long will probably dry off the residue. Washing it immediately is the best way to get it clean faster. 

  
  


And Changbin needs the pot, please. He only has this one and another smaller one.

  
  


He gets up to follow the guy to the kitchen. He needs to wash his hands.

  
  


"What do I need to bring on Saturday?"

  
  


"Huh? Nothing. Just get some trunks. And shades. And sunscreen. We will be there the whole day. Never been to a water park?"

  
  


"Nah, not in a long time."

  
  


"Oh."

  
  


"Also, I have a match on Wednesday next week. Be my plus one."

  
  


"You do realize we aren't dating right?"

  
  


"Yes. Come with. It's gonna be fun."

  
  


"Where is it?"

  
  


"Intra-college. Against Kyungsang. We leave just after classes. The match starts at 5PM."

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


"And Changbin."

  
  


"Hmm?"

  
  


"Wear my cap. It looks cute on you."

  
  


It kinda does. Navy is his color, Changbin knows that.

  
  


It's good to be complimented though.

  
  


He smiles. Genuine.

  
  


\-------------

  
  
  


"Yeah, Maa. I'm doing okay. Yes, I'm eating well. The classes are going okay. Oh, wait a second. I have a friend over. Bye. Speak to you soon."

  
  


Changbin had been running around the dorm. Getting it tidy. Or getting the visible stuff thrown off. 

  
  


Laundry goes to the laundry basket. Empty packets go to the dustbin. There are some paper clips lying here and there.

  
  


His regular calls with his mom are kinda just catch-up ones. They just hum and repeat the same stuff. Every single time.

  
  


Changbin had not expected a guest at this hour. 

  
  


Much less. Kim Jeongin.

  
  


"Hi? Come in."

  
  


"Hi Changbin. How have you been?"

  
  


Speaking with Jeongin feels like a business meeting. On call or in person. He is straightforward and mysterious. Very mysterious.

  
  


"All good. Have a seat."

  
  


"Nah, I'm good. Thanks. I'll be quick. I have an update for you."

  
  


"Mhhmm."

  
  


Changbin's heart is beating so loud. What now?

  
  


"We tracked the IP address of the perpetrator. It's from this University. Library. Someone used the college library to send the clues and the messages to the board."

  
  


Shit. It's someone in the same University. Who knows him enough to do this?

  
  


Who will go to this extent to make Changbin suffer?

  
  


But on the other hand, he is glad it's not Yeonsoo. Changbin genuinely wants to be friends with her.

  
  


"Do we know who?"

  
  


"Not yet. But it could be someone close to you. Keep your eyes open."

  
  


"Hmm. Okay."

  
  


"Good luck. I will leave now."

  
  


Jeongin leaves without a word. More questions than answers.

  
  


It's creepy enough that he has a library session with Chan. In another hour.

  
  


He should cancel it. Or get him here. They can study at his dorm. 

  
  


Changbin is not scared. No. He just wants to avoid all the mess now that he knows there's someone watching his every move.

  
  


And Seungmin and him have finally got the University rolling on their lie. He doesn't want to harm him.

  
  


Chan should be okay with the sudden change of plan.

  
  


He hopes so.

  
  


Me: chan can we meet in my dorm?

Me: my legs kinda hurt

  
  


Such a lame excuse.

  
  


Chan: Oh, sure.

Chan: Coming in 20

  
  


Me: cool

  
  


Changbin kills the extra time taking a quick shower. Nothing needed. Just an excuse to clear his brain.

  
  


What kind of evil has he attracted?

  
  


He is getting into his pajamas when the doorbell rings. Just on time. So Bang Chan.

  
  


Changbin opens the door to a grinning Chan. He sure is giddy. Things are definitely going well in his life.

  
  


At least his friend is happy. He deserves that.

  
  


"Wow, you are shining haha. Come on in."

  
  


Chan walks inside, his dimples full on display. Some happiness that can not be contained. They will break every facade, every walls that binds them.

  
  


Changbin wishes he could protect his friend's happiness. But he has no control over his own life. How can he do it for him?

  
  


But, any day Chan comes to him, he will be there for him. With open arms.

  
  


You need not know every nook and corner of someone to be their friend. Sometimes just a connection is enough.

  
  


"Juice?"

  
  


"Haha, no no. Let's start? I have to be somewhere. In an hour or so."

  
  


"Oooh. A date?"

  
  


"Naah. Haha. Just hanging out."

  
  


"You sorted your mess then. Good good."

  
  


He only gets a toothy grin in return.

  
  


They get to work. Changbin has only a few logics that make no sense to him. Wrapping up this session won't take a lot of time.

  
  


The coffee table is full of loose sheets and textbooks. Pens. Markers. Post its.

  
  


Changbin loves studying with Chan. He is so patient and kind.

  
  


Today, Chan is humming. Paul Kim. Me After You. Familiar. Beautiful.

  
  


He knows this song. He has had those mushy days too. Road trips, Urban Zakpa, beach days, champagne, and your partner. 

  
  


Rosy love.

  
  


A Sunday kind of love.

  
  


Under the Neon Moon.

  
  


Near light, dust and echos.

  
  


Where everything seems fresh. Everything beautiful.

  
  


Like the ground after a heavy rainfall.

  
  


Like a family meeting after an eternity.

  
  


Like your first love.

  
  


There's nothing that can pull you down. You sit on the throne. Love really has that power.

  
  


One day he will try to fall in love again.

  
  


Maybe this time there will be someone who won't drop him.

  
  


\-------------

  
  


"Ugh it's so hot today. Like it's mid May. I will melt. Why did I even agree to come? It's all Felix's fault. And Jisung's. Why can't he ever talk sense into Lix. I wonder if the water is going to warm too. I need ice cubes."

  
  


"It's okay. Just 5 minutes and you'll find out."

  
  


"How are you so calm?"

  
  


"I train under the sun most of the time."

  
  


"Ugh. Right. Now where are they? Wait let me call."

  
  


"They are here."

  
  


He spots the couple in the distance. Walking far too leisurely. Like they want to punish him. 

  
  


Or maybe because they wanted to give Seungmin and him space?

  
  


He clearly needs none. There's a reason why they took Seungmin's car today.

  
  


Jisung is wearing a teal polo and khaki shorts and Felix is in a white oversized t-shirt with baby pink shorts. The shorter has ridiculous Summer glasses on.

  
  


Heck, they don't even match.

  
  


It's like a father taking his son to his Summer camp. Not a gross couple as they are.

  
  


Seungmin and him are doing a better job at this couple shit. And they aren't even dating.

  
  


How can they _not_ match when they legit went to shop for matching stuff. Navy shorts, white undershirt, and a floral shirt on top of it.

  
  


They look like text-book couples. A pair that can be tracked from several miles away. Exactly what they are pretending to be.

  
  


And fooling Jisung and Felix is more important than the thousands of parents and kids visiting the park.

  
  


Oh, yes.

  
  


Hopefully, they will not be questioned about their interesting choice of clothing.

  
  


Maybe.

  
  


Only if Seungmin behaves.

  
  


Changbin has already briefed him about the rules they are going to follow here.

  
  


One. No inappropriate touching or kissing or anything. It's a family friendly place for God's sake.

  
  


Two. Avoid being alone with Felix. Or Jisung. Or both. Seungmin has to be with Changbin all the time.

  
  


Three. Don't indulge their questions. Read two. Make an excuse. Run to the bathroom. Evaporate in thin air. But don't ever try to answer anything they ask.

  
  


Four. Pretend to be yourself. If you'll be too lovey-dovey, it might make them too curious. That said, don't feed Changbin. That's a no no.

  
  


Five. Hand holding is okay.

  
  


Changbin really hopes Seungmin follows two and three diligently. He is okay going to jail for inappropriate conduct. But his friends are scarier.

  
  


Especially Felix.

  
  


Don't go on his smiling face.

  
  


That guy can lure you into doing anything he wants. Changbin is speaking for himself. 

  
  


The bright pink sweater in his family home can vouch for that event. It was Prada and cost him half a kidney. He only wore it once. On Felix's birthday. Never again.

  
  


"Hey!!! Sorry it took us some time aaah. We got….busy."

  
  


He should have known.

  
  


Changbin should have fucking known.

  
  


His 'friends' let them roast in the burning sun for 20 minutes because they wanted to smooch. Or fuck. Whatever.

  
  


There should be a special place in hell for 'friends' like them.

  
  


"Really guys? Really?"

  
  


"Oops. Let's go haha."

  
  


Changbin is two seconds away from decking Felix. He is too shameless.

  
  


Seungmin says nothing. He is just smiling. The red is flaming in the sun. It suits him. This shade. No wonder he is hell-bent to keep it. Like his own brand.

  
  


"Come on, pictures!!"

  
  


Felix uses his camera to capture the moment. Seungmin hesitates and then places his arms around Changbin. That's thoughtful of him. 

  
  


It's 11 AM when they finally enter the park. Too late if you ask Changbin.

  
  


They will get only 5-6 hours to cover every ride. And with the lines that long it's going to be only selected ones.

  
  


Changbin really wants to try tornado swings and speed rafting. It's been on his bucket list for so long.

  
  


They separate near the changing rooms. It will be quick anyway. He can't wait to be sloshed by cold water. He deserves having fun. Really.

  
  


He takes his own towel with him. Stuffing his wallet and clothes into the provided locker.

  
  


Seungmin is waiting for him outside his stall. How sweet of him. 

  
  


Wait.

  
  


What is that?

  
  


It was not there before?

  
  


"Since when do you have a tattoo??"

  
  


"Since I was 16?"

  
  


Wait. 16? 5 years? He has seen Seungmin half naked so many times and he never noticed a branched plant on his hip? 

  
  


It's slant, shooting on the side. Very low on his hip. Maybe that's why it wasn't that visible.

  
  


Seungmin's speedos are low enough to show a few stray leaves. They look really really pretty.

  
  


"I'm sorry I was so surprised haha. They are beautiful."

  
  


"You can touch it. It's old."

  
  


"Huh?"

  
  


He quickly looks around. Seungmin chuckles. He finds his paranoia funny.

  
  


"There's no one around. Go ahead."

  
  


Changbin uses his left finger to poke the line on the top. Just experimental.

  
  


It's not stiff like most of the tattoos are. The lines are soft. He trails the rest of his fingers across the visible space. Checking if Seungmin is ticklish. He is not.

  
  


"I would say you can check the whole tattoo out, but that would be too inappropriate by your rules. Maybe later. I have another one on my finger. I mostly keep it covered with a band-aid. See."

  
  


Seungmin raises his left pinky up. 

  
  


Sure, there's a band-aid on it. Common for sportsmen. But Seungmin has another special reason.

  
  


"I will show you this one too. One day."

  
  


"Okay."

  
  


Friends do this right?

  
  


He knows everything about Jisung. Down to his birthmarks. 

  
  


It's not weird to look forward to knowing more about your friend's tattoos.

  
  


Right?

  
  


\----------

  
  


They plan to tackle only 4 rides to make the most of their time in Lotte Park.

  
  


Changbin had called it.

  
  


But less rides meant more focus. More time to spend on each ride.

  
  


They take the spiral spin first. Basic but very crucial if you want to get the essence of a water park. They all take a fourway boat. Sitting on the edges for the balance.

  
  


Water is fresh and cool. Exactly what Changbin needs.

  
  


They scream and laugh as the boat makes it way across the tunnel.

  
  


Thrilling.

  
  


Fun.

  
  


The drop has his heart in his mouth. But totally worth getting splashed with still moving water.

  
  


He feels like he is 5 again.

  
  


Young and carefree.

  
  


With only one wish. To reach the stars. 

  
  


Vivid dreams. Fireflies.

  
  


Growing up you have to think practical.

  
  


Reaching the stars?

  
  


What will you study?

  
  


Do you have money?

  
  


Mental strength?

  
  


Support?

  
  


There are only a handful who are able to turn their dreams into reality.

  
  


Rest just struggle. Like him.

  
  


Like thousands of others.

  
  


He envies people who have the strength to stand up and do the thing they want.

  
  


People who give a fuck about what the society wants.

  
  


People who live for themselves.

  
  


People who have shed their past for a new future.

  
  


People who are happy.

  
  


Someday Changbin will fly for his own self.

  
  


For himself.

  
  


\----------

  
  


"These hot dogs are tasty. I was told Lotte food tastes like rock."

  
  


"They better be. We paid a fortune for these items."

  
  


Seriously, they took 300,000 won for chicken nuggets, two hot dogs and soda. 

  
  


They halted their adventure for a quick meal. Not lunch or that'll be out in no time.

  
  


"We should try their restaurant in the evening. It's good. At least worth all the money."

  
  


Jisung always has great ideas. No wonder he is the only one who survived with Changbin's luck.

  
  


"True. True. We can explore that later. By the way, Seungmin. Hope you are enjoying it!"

  
  


"Oh, yes. It is fun."

  
  


Crisp. 

  
  


"Good. Good. I'm happy for you both though. You are cute together."

  
  


Felix looks genuinely happy. 

  
  


Uh.

  
  


"Yeah. You match well."

  
  


Not you too, Jisung. 

  
  


Way to get Changbin sentimental.

  
  


"You think so? Ah, thank you. He is really cute."

  
  


What the fuck Kim Seungmin. Not a word more.

  
  


"Haha. He is!! Our dumpling has had a really hard time with love and dating. I'm happy that he is comfortable with you. I would have given you this 'best friend' talk separately, but Changbin here won't like it. He is kinda possessive. Even if he tries to show he is cool."

  
  


Lee Felix Yongbok.

  
  


You are on Changbin's death note now.

  
  


"What do you mean best friend? Jisung is my best friend. I just tolerate you."

  
  


Jisung just snorts at the side. Seungmin copies him.

  
  


Felix opens his mouth like a pufferfish. Acting all shocked.

  
  


It's their thing. Subtle insults and throwaways. Pure teasing. Nothing Felix is not used to.

  
  


"Wow. You broke my heart. I was ready to name our first-born after you."

  
  


"Wait, I never consented to that. Kim-Lee Changbin sounds ugly anyway."

  
  


"Tell this to your brother, Kim. He suggested Changbin to my maa. If my name is funny, it's coming from your clan."

  
  


"Hey, Jongwoon hyung only wanted to help. It was your maa who gave up looking for new names on the telephone directory."

  
  


"Shut the fuck up."

  
  


"Right back at you."

  
  


"Wow. This is new. Interesting."

  
  


"Shut up, Felix."

  
  


They end the day with rain dance. 

  
  


Wild. Half naked people dancing into the popular tunes. Changbin doesn't know half of them. But it's fun and totally worth indulging in.

  
  


Now Changbin is not a pro. He can just move his hands and legs. And it isn't a competition either. 

  
  


It's crazy. And so relieving.

  
  


A psychedelic experience.

  
  


Seungmin can't dance either. He is worse at it than Changbin is. But he is laughing along. 

  
  


A human.

  
  


Not a rock.

  
  


Human with a lot of hidden aspects. Things. Feelings.

  
  


The tattoos.

  
  


The laughter.

  
  


Changbin laughs with him.

  
  


Maybe they can be friends.

  
  


Not bound by a deal. But just because they enjoy each other's company.

  
  


Changbin knows he does.

  
  


\-----------

  
  


Many things happen when you get used to something.

  
  


You expect a lot.

  
  


You expect a lot from people who don't deserve it.

  
  


You start opening your soul for someone to crash and burn it.

  
  


Changbin has no right to feel this way.

  
  


They had agreed for on-campus stuff. It was okay for off-campus scenarios.

  
  


Then why the fuck it hurts to see Seungmin getting so close to this another person?

  
  


And no. This is a pure platonic betrayal.

  
  


Nothing more. Nothing less.

  
  


Changbin had made efforts to dress his best. Even wore a nice shirt to go with the navy basketball cap. 

  
  


He had cheered Seungmin all through the match. 

  
  


Let's be clear. Changbin gives a flying fuck about basketball. Sports in general. But he still came. Like a stupid trophy wife.

  
  


And this bitch had the audacity to go out with another bitch?

  
  


At least, tell Changbin so he can catch a cab and go back to relax. He doesn't even know anyone here.

  
  


This is so annoying.

  
  


He really did not want to do this. But he doesn't want Seungmin's teammates to catch their power forward with someone that isn't his boyfriend. 

  
  


Changbin has had enough troubles with the cheating scandals already.

  
  


"Hey. Seungmin. Let's go back. Oh, sorry. I did not see you here."

  
  


He tries to act as innocent as he can. The girl looks kind of uncomfortable. Good. Now please get out. Take the hint, damn it.

  
  


Seungmin detaches himself from her. Again. No expressions. 

  
  


Not even annoyance.

  
  


What the fuck is he made of?

  
  


The girl finally takes the hint and leaves them alone.

  
  


Changbin just sighs.

  
  


"Seungmin. I know we discussed it's okay if we want to bang anyone outside the Uni. But we still have your teammates here. And some other collegemates. I don't want rumors please."

  
  


"Okay. Let's date then. For real."

  
  


What?

  
  


Really, what?

  
  


"What, no. I did not mean like that. I am just saying don't do this when anyone from our college is around. Do you understand?"

  
  


"Yeah. I do. Don't think it will be easier if we just date?"

  
  


"We don't even like each other, what the fuck."

  
  


Changbin's head is two seconds away from bursting. It makes no sense.

  
  


"You are cute. I'm okay dating you."

  
  


"But, I am not. Ah, Seungmin. No no. I mean you are hot. Ugh. But I don't think I can date anyone now. Or ever. Plus, we have stuff to take care of. I'm just too caught in my head. Sorry."

  
  


"Okay. It's fine. I said I'll help. I will. Chill."

  
  


Seungmin is just humming as if he didn't ask a million-dollar question. Changbin wishes he had Seungmin's nonchalance. 

  
  


But he is an over thinker.

  
  


Oh well.

  
  


\----------

  
  


Changbin had desperately wished for distraction.

  
  


And it did come. 

  
  


Finals started last week of June. And the entirety of the week preceding it were spent on cramming sessions, study dates and everything that could get him to pass.

  
  


It meant less of Seungmin.

  
  


Exactly what he needed after that Kyungsang event.

  
  


His brain still can not comprehend how casually Seungmin had asked him out.

  
  


No hesitation. At all.

  
  


Changbin remembers all his confessions. Embarrassing, but yes.

  
  


And not one of them went this smooth.

  
  


He had been a blubbering mess in the first. Forgot what he wanted to say in the second. And got laughed at in another.

  
  


Seungmin sounded like he confesses to people for a living.

  
  


Like those emotionless tele callers asking for your credit card details. Never give out your private details on phone, by the way.

  
  


And he had accepted the rejection like a pro.

  
  


Changbin would have come back to listen to Kim Jaejoong's heartbreaking songs on repeat. 'One kiss' would have fit the situation the best.

  
  


He needs to take a few extra lessons from the guy.

  
  


No, really.

  
  


Changbin needs to get back to his Microbial Genetics notes. He has an exam to take the next day. The last one. Finally.

  
  


His phone vibrates out of a sudden.

  
  


Oh, he forgot to mute it.

  
  


Kim Seungmin: did we plan to have a date tomorrow evening?

  
  


No? What? Is he now projecting scenarios?

  
  


Me: naah what are you talking abt 

Me: i have exams

  
  


Kim Seungmin: oh. i had a dream last night that i did.

Kim Seungmin: so i thought i did

Kim Seungmin: its okay if we did not. lets meet and celebrate our finals ending. just me and you

  
  


See. This is what Changbin was talking about.

  
  


This guy is pretty smooth for his own good. He should be an actor or something.

  
  


Me: are you done?

Me: your cheesy pickup lines are giving me a high cholesterol level

Me: tone down

  
  


Kim Seungmin: lol

Kim Seungmin: but date? at 6 PM?

Kim Seungmin: you decide the place

Kim Seungmin: also if you are stopping me from seeing other ppl at least give me ny kisses?

  
  


Me: needy

  
  


Kim Seungmin: thats not a no

Kim Seungmin: meet you tomorrow

  
  


Me: ok bye

  
  


He might sound very casual on messages but Changbin wants to throw his phone away and jump into a hole.

  
  


Vibration.

  
  


What else is left? Kim Seungmin is out to kill him.

  
  


It's not Seungmin. Thankfully.

  
  


Jisung: Hey, how are exams going?

  
  


Me: good good. only one left. then i can breathe haha

  
  


Jisung: 😂

Jisung: i have some good news

Jisung: I got the opportunity

  
  


Me: wowoowowoow

Me: CONGRATULATIONS

Me: this is fantastic news shhdh

  
  


Jisung: 😊 thank you

Jisung: By the way, can you reach Lix?

Jisung: I have been trying to message and call him for so long

  
  


Me: i havent tried

Me: wait. let me go to his dorm

Me: we can videocall from there

  
  


Jisung: Thank you haha

Jisung: I just couldn't wait

  
  


Me: no no its really a fantastic news kim

Me: i dont say it often

Me: but im proud of you ;(

  
  


Jisung: Wait. Let me screenshot it

Jisung: Seo Changbin getting mushy with me?

Jisung: Happens only once every few years

  
  


Me: shut up or i wont go

Jisung: 😂😂

Jisung: Sorry. go go

  
  


Changbin is smiling so big his gums could split into two.

  
  


If anyone deserves that opportunity, it's Kim Jisung. The guy works hard. Has had his whole life dedicated to his research and studies. His folios are always praised.

  
  


And now he will get his paper released in a ceremony in Havard University. A chance of a fucking lifetime.

  
  


Felix would be so happy about it.

  
  


He might tease him. Make fun of him. But deep down Changbin knows Felix loves Jisung the most. Is so damn loyal to him.

  
  


No wonder he felt so insecure around them after his breakup.

  
  


He might have been annoyed at it. But their pseudo dates did help him a lot. Felix did help him a lot.

  
  


Him choosing a place near the 'frat house' did come as a blessing in disguise. Changbin made some new friends and got a partnership that could potentially get Universitizens off his tail.

  
  


He doesn't get a lot of credit for it, but Felix is a really good friend. Dedicated. Loyal.

  
  


Changbin dresses up quickly. Impatient. It would only take him a few minutes to reach Felix's dorm anyway.

  
  


PNA building is only three blocks away. He doesn't even need his car. A nice jog will be good for his sore muscles. He has been sitting in one place for hours for studies.

  
  


It takes him 5 minutes in total. 

  
  


The building is not unfamiliar. But he hasn't been there more than a handful of times. That too with Jisung accompanying him.

  
  


But he wants to tell him. 

  
  


See him getting happy over his boyfriend's achievements.

  
  


His dorm is only on the first floor.

  
  


Changbin rings the bell once. Feet shuffling due to movement after days of inactivity. Mind fresh. Happy.

  
  


It's not Felix who opens the door.

  
  


Not even his roommate.

  
  


It's Kim Jeongin.

  
  


Lee Felix is sitting on his sofa surrounded by papers and a laptop. Some printouts. 

  
  


Now, Changbin wears glasses for a reason.

  
  


He can clearly see what's on the printouts. They have been blown out of proportion anyway.

  
  


It's him. 

  
  


And Yeonsoo.

  
  


In _Jesters_.

  
  


Betrayal does hurt.

  
  


Hurts fucking bad.

  
  


Seems like Changbin can never trust anyone. Everyone just stabs him on the back. 

  
  


Felix pierced his heart.

  
  


He is bleeding.

  
  


His faith in people is bleeding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a long chapter and I presume the final would be longer :) I will also drop a few bonus scene and a potential spin-off for this verse^^
> 
> Let me know who is your favorite character so far! I'll drop mine after the last chapter hehe.
> 
> Here's my [Twitter](https://twitter.com/linoshub) and I drop a lot of spoilers there :D No seriously, you'll see the pattern. Have something to say, get on my [Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.qa/linoshub)
> 
> As always, thank you for giving it a lot of love, it encourages me to write more :)

**Author's Note:**

> Let's say this was my excuse to make fun of Dispatch and all those dating/rumor mills :D
> 
> I had a blast while writing this and would love your thoughts on it :)
> 
> Reach out to me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/linoshub) & [Curious Cat](https://curiouscat.qa/linoshub) \- I drop spoilers here and there hehe.


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